The Return of the Entish Beings (REB III) Planning/Discussion

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Did you really think that the adventures of Merisuwyniel and her companions were all over? Well, brace yourself – they go on! Since a number of the original writers are now seldom active on the forum, I have decided to continue on my own. This will be a solo RPG with cameos by guest writers. I know that’s unusual and hasn’t been done on the Downs; fortunately, the Gondor RPG forum provides a location for new ideas and experimental stories.

After “The Revenge of the Entish Bow” and “The Reunification of the Entish Bow”, Merisu’s bow no longer exists as such, but has become the Ent-That-Was-Restored. For a time, he remains in Valleyum, probably hoping against hope that his beloved Entwife will be found someday. In the meantime, Merisu and Gravlox are on their way back to Muddled-Mirth with his squire Windsor Gummidge and with Halfemption (characters created by myself, Mithadan, The Saucepan Man, and Rimbaud and now handled by me with permission of the original writers). They have discovered that Halfemption is actually the missing king of Grundor and have taken up the task of restoring him to his kingdom – and to sobriety/sanity/respectability/whatever necessary. Also sailing with them is Gateskeeper; Thenamir will be the first cameo author to join in, returning with his character.

The authorial team of the past two RPGs was fantastic, setting high standards for parody writing. Any past authors are welcome to contribute old or new characters, episodes, plot and storyline ideas, and to comment on this thread. In addition, other members of the Downs who have an idea or character to contribute are welcome to contact me by PM or e-mail [ estelyn(at)barrowdowns.com ]. Writing on the story thread is by invitation only!

The opening post of the RPG thread will be up soon; additional planning and plotting will be posted here.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

The first post of the (continued) story is up. It briefly sums up where Merisu is and what her situation is for those who have either not read the previous two RPGs or who have forgotten since then. If you'd like to reread them, they can be found here:
The Revenge of the Entish Bow (http://www.forum.barrowdowns.com/showthread.php?t=5751)
The Reunification of the Entish Bow (http://www.forum.barrowdowns.com/showthread.php?t=5662)

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Some may notice that I have chosen an avatar picture that possibly resembles a certain Elf...

[Bêthberry]

Bu... bbbu....bbbuuu...ut. I thought MarySues had red hair, like your previous Asterix avvie.

Don't tell us you're taking a cue from Tolkien and confusing us about elven hair colour.

[Bêthberry]

Oh, and, isn't it a tad early in the game for saves? :D

[Estelyn Telcontar]

But saves are an essential part of REB! It can never be too early! ;)

As to Merisu's hair color, I quote:her waist-length, rippling golden hair I know, rather clichéd, but she does have exotic violet eyes...

[Thenamir]

Esty, do you already have a plan in mind for the Repair of the Ent-questors' Boat? And any specific place or manner you'd like me to jump in with Gateskeeper?

And since confusion is my normal state, I could not precisely judge where we are geographically -- as far as I could tell, we're still in Valleyum, having not yet departed for the Muddled-Mirth Mainland? Correct me if I'm mistaken. Thanks!

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

I may have a solution to the boat problem, Thenamir. Estelyn's currently considering various wild ideas that I threw at her this afternoon.

Preparations are underway for my re-enlistment in the REB project, with just a few logistical details (my internet connection) and some storyline elements to be sorted out. This will be a new character, since Earnur Etceteron's agent is charging far too much these days.

Wait: Panacea looks like Merisuwyniel? Is this some diseased fruit of our temporal peregrinations in REB II?

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Oh my, Thena, managing to turn phrases in REBs could be a running joke here! The boat question will be taken care of, but for the first, the travellers have a Mission To Fulfil on the island. More soon - I'll let you know what possibilities Gatesy has. Check out the rhyme for whatever information you can glean from it - or try Malbeth... :rolleyes:

As to location, we are on our way home from Valleyum - see my last post on Part 2 for the boarding of the sailing ship and the farewell from Yawanna and the shores of Valleyum. However, we have not reached Muddled-Mirth yet. Just because you haven't heard of these islands in the Sea doesn't mean they're not there! ;)

Squatter, I'm happy that you will be joining us! We'll work out some of the plot ideas and get you guys into the thick of things just as soon as I finish Hal's post.

Panacea may not be exactly like Merisu, but the image seemed appropriate somehow.

[Thenamir]

Thanks for the clarifications, though I'm sure everyone else understood it perfectly.

One last loose end -- in re-reading the tail-end of REB2, I didn't see what happened to Pimpi and Vogonwe -- they're not on the passenger manifest for the boat trip. Was that an oversight, or are they intentionally honeymooning in Valleyum?

(What a lovely short FanFic it would make, to parody The Honeymooners using Pimpi and Vogonwe in Valleyum...)

[Estelyn Telcontar]

They stayed in Valleyum - when they were last seen, they were looking for some real estate and planning to settle there.

[Thenamir]

A sad loss for the Now-Poetless-Ship, to be sure. Thanks again.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

The save has been filled in - morning dawns, and the various characters will awaken to find the remnants of their boat gone. Could it be that someone has taken it for spare parts? But then, is there even someone besides them on this island? Stay tuned...

Thena, Gatesy could try to make a gadget that helps them to find their location - unfortunately, it probably will not work, without a satellite system. Are there any other gadgets that will help them survive here?


Oh, credit for the closing song in my post for Hal goes to the musical "The Man of La Mancha".

[Thenamir]

OK, now I understand why I was so confused by your first post -- I read the shipwreck of their current boat as if it was Merisu's recollection of the wreck upon their arrival in Valleyum. Now I get it. They've wrecked on a different island on their way back home. Being the over-analytical type is good for computer programming, but bad for most of the rest of life.

In addition to Repo Man gags, hopping from island to island is going to open up the possibility of Gilligan's Island, Tom Hanks' Cast Away (what would be Gormlessar's "Wilson"?), and several other running jokes. I can see Gateskeeper as "the Professor", always trying to invent stuff using only bamboo and coconut shells...

I'll have some time today to work on a Gateskeeper post, and should have it up...on second thought, every time I've made a commitment to a timeframe in REB's past, I've always missed it. Suffice to say it will be up as soon as humanly possible.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Squatter, what an absolutely smashing (ahem!) post! It's wonderful - my favourite line has to be "boldly going where they’d quite often been before." There are way too many parodic references to mention them all - marvelous stuff! You've created a great new character, plus his intrepid crew. I look forward to whatever comes next.

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Many thanks, Estelyn. I only hope that I haven't used up all the jokes in one post.

I've left Meanderin and his crew out of touch with Merisuwyniel and her companions so that other players can come upon them in whatever way they see fit. I notice that I haven't described Meanderin in any detail, so I'll give you a brief run-down here.

Meanderin is short, skinny, badly shaven and worse dressed, with ungovernable mousy hair, watery eyes and various Homeric accoutrements that don't suit him or, indeed, fit. His crested Spartan helmet keeps falling over his eyes (or dropping off his head entirely from time to time); there is a large gap between his impressively muscled breastplate and his actual breast, and his moth-eaten scarlet cape is ragged at the hem from trailing on the ground behind him. His crew are basically going to be a pastiche of the Argonauts, the sailors of Odysseus' fleet and anyone else from mythology or maritime fiction who can't get out of the way quickly enough. There are enough of them to allow plenty of latitude for names and personalities.

Incidentally, I'm all at sea with Gilligan's Island. I don't think it's ever been broadcast on this side of the Water, and if it has I missed it. I haven't followed Lost either for that matter. I suppose that there's enough fiction about people stuck on islands that even the most remote must be getting crowded by now. What horrors would result, for example, from Treasure Island having to share a mile-square atoll with The Island of Dr. Moreau? Heaven forbid.

[Thenamir]

First Gateskeeper post is up. It's relatively short, and not up to my perfectionist standards, but I didn't want anyone to wait for me. I just couldn't come up with a decent parody episode yet, so it's rather bland. Hopefully, I'll be better inspired as the story progresses.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

It's a great post, Thena! I enjoyed reading it very much - length isn't everything, and sometimes less is more.

I laughed over Gatesy's fishing method and over your descriptions of the crab and fish - fun stuff! I do like his adding McGyver gimmick qualities to his already present PC abilities.

[Thenamir]

Likewise, Esty, what an inventive way to watch TV (Tele-Velour). Will we be seeing more of Clint of the Eastern Wood? Or of the scantily clad warrior princess? Perhaps Xena could be Halfie's temptation on this Isle of Chastity?

And Squatter, Laetninrod of the Red Tunic! My guffaw generator burned out! Well done!

[Estelyn Telcontar]

We're off to a good start! There may possibly be other players joining us; negotiations are taking place behind the scenes. We have some time to explore the island, to meet Squatter's crew, perhaps to meet additional characters, and for Hal's test before we sail on to the next. I have not planned how much RL time this will take; we shall see how inspiration (not lightning, hopefully! *quickly changes her red sweater for a less susceptible color*) strikes us.

"Clint of the Eastern Wood" - now that's clever, Thena! Sounds like a character that should be played by Underhill! I had actually thought of that image as being the Marlboro man, but I like your idea much better.

I don't suppose I need to tell anyone here that the ending of my last post owes a great deal to Tolkien's own words in "The Breaking of the Fellowship"...


By the way, speaking of "Fellowship" - as I see it, the "Fellow/Galship" ended in Valleyum, breaking up when the majority of the members parted. (Of the original cast that started out at the beginning of the first part, only Merisu is left! :eek: ) I'm open to suggestions for a new name; you may have noticed that I cunningly avoided using a moniker for the group so far...

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

We can't ask Underhill to take time out of his busy schedule just to write some comic homage to a Hollywood icon. Surely he would never wear such an imposition. Anyway, I'm glad to hear that others mean to join us in our bumbling progress through these mysterious islands.

I've discovered that my order for an internet connection was somehow lost, but I'm now assured that the equipment is on its way. I'm also working on some ideas for a temptation, at least for my lucky lads. Incidentally, I've been considering the earlier versions of the Hiding of Valinor, where a belt of enchanted islands bars the path from the Hither Lands. What I was trying to say in chat last night was that we could have stumbled on just such a defence, and be negotiating it in entirely the wrong direction. It seems typically REB to go through the cunning magical defences after having already visited the kingdom they protect. I think they call such dumb luck 'the Beren factor'.

I'm glad you liked poor Laetninrod's brief moment of fame, Thenamir. Somehow I get the impression that you organise an interesting fishing trip.

[Thenamir]

In wandering around and refamiliarising myself with more of the forum and its various nooks and crannies, I noticed that our new venture here has not been advertised at The Seventh Star -- nor has anything else for the last several months. Perhaps a new posting there might attract some attention.

Additionally, while I have no idea how the process works, perhaps it could be time to consider some new admissions to Gondor from Rohan?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Good point. It always pays to advertise.

Anyway, apparently even in a world sub-created for the purpose of escape from everyday irritations one can still be put on hold. I'll leave it up to someone else to find a way to release the crew from their predicament.

Now I know that strictly speaking old Mogul was defeated in the last episode, but even the most comprehensively defeated evil corporate CEO must have the odd forgotten auto-responder. I can remove the reference if it looks to be causing trouble.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

No, please don't remove the reference, Squatter - it works out very well! After all, the end of the main baddie nevers means the end of the evil he perpetrated, and a forgotten answering machine is a most horrifying evil indeed!

Your post is great fun to read! My favourite line here is the byname of the beach leader, "He who rides at night". Apparently these characters have been in close touch with the gods and goddesses of Valleyum, for they appear to speak that language and live that lifestyle very well!

Now the question is, shall I write Hal's testing first, or would Thena like to have the male questers find the remains of their ship and meet Squatter's crew next?

Oh, and the idea of reviving the Seventh Star to advertise our presence is good - anyone want to tackle the task? I won't have much time for any but the most necessary posting in the next days.

[Thenamir]

Squatter, I have to admire your ability to come up with names. I bow to your comedic brilliance.

I will post over in the Seventh Star for our new venture, and see what may come of it.

I will also drag our band over to the sailors on-hold, after having dealt with my own suitably geeky sensual temptation, and attempt to hack the auto-responder.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Saucy, what a wonderful post! I can't believe that we have gone through two RPGs containing a city of that name, and no one had yet come up with the idea of using toothpaste brands in a post - brilliant! (I do have vague memories of a newspaper invented by Diamond called "The Daily Floss", IIRC.)

It's great to have you in the game with us - what would REB be without at least one loyer?! Our legal eagles have had a vital part in shaping the story, and no one is better suited to writing the bad guys. Thanks especially for taking over Denimthor, who's basically been an NPC for the previous games. He has great cosmetic potential - after all, isn't he a Proctor who Gambles? ;)

I am currently working on the men's search for the ship - that post should be up within the next couple of hours, perhaps sooner.

[Thenamir]

Wonderful posts, Saucy and Esty! Great fun with the references to the dental processes and products -- the "Ceremony of Bhrûsh-èn-Gärgelh" practically caused me to spew coffee on my monitor. And I don't think I've seen anyone write Gateskeeper quite so well. Great posts, all.

At Esty's request, I have held my aforementioned post until her latest was up, which is now the case. At the risk of self-defeating goal-setting, I will probably be able to post before the end of the day today.

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Cool. I didn't want to get any work done anyway.

Welcome to the story, Saucepan. I've been saying for some time that we can't seem to get our portrayal of the evil and corrupt quite right without some sort of legal representation.

I can't believe we didn't use all those toothpaste jokes either, but that just goes to show what a stroke of genius it was to think of it. I thought the bridges quite evocative too. I see that Denimthor dresses like the 1980s rock legend his name suggests, although you can't get much more korprat than that shirt.

[The Saucepan Man]

Thanks for the welcome, folks. :D

Having returned from holiday to see the third instalment of the trilogy underway, and in such style, I could not resist getting in on the action. I will be posting intermittently, as there is no hurry to get the villains underway on their chase. It seems that the Castaway-ship(less) will have enough to contend with in the meantime.

Credit to Wikipedia for the list of toothpaste brands, without which my own memory would have stretched to two or three at most. :rolleyes:

Credit also to Bee-Dubyah, of course, for his conception of Denimthor, which inspired much of his introduction as a main character in this story. The legend on his t-shirt, while dreadfully cliched, just seemed to fit somehow.

Anyway, wonderful stuff so far from all concerned, and I'm looking forward to much more of the same.

Who knows? Maybe some others will be tempted back to the long, tortuous path that is a REB RPG.

Oh, and ...

"He who rides at night"

Classic! :D

[The Saucepan Man]

... after all, isn't he a Proctor who Gambles?Bah! You beat me to it ...! ;)

[Estelyn Telcontar]

I too am finding Wikipedia an invaluable reference source for popular culture - since it's been longer than I can remember that I last played Battleship, I brushed up on the proper terminology there.

Oh, and Denimthor's T-shirt seems to foreshadow his mental condition...

Announcement: I will be away from home for several days, internet connection hopefully possible, but probably quite limited. I shall attempt to finish Hal's post - anyone want to write one for Gummidge? I have an idea, but will have to see how my scheduling goes - and then leave the rest of you to write up the two groups meeting and to leave the island and arrive at the next while I'm away.

Thena, I will put up a save, just in case my post fits in better before yours. If it works better afterwards, I'll delete it and post later.

[Thenamir]

My save is filled. We may have a new, if a bit robotic, character.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

A great post, and a fabulous new character, Thena! Merisu will surely be glad of female companionship - or something, I hope...

I loved the sportsmanship Gatesy shows at the beginning, and the very apt descriptions of Tara :eek: - oh, and the lovely alliteration!

Unfortunately, time is running short before I leave, so my save will be filled as soon as I have the opportunity to do so from afar, hopefully within the next couple of days. I'll sneak in as often as I can!

[Thenamir]

Consider the following from near the end of REB2:

“At any rate,” Gravlox chuckled, “there’s no doubt of our Elven marital status after this night! Now we should consider whether we wish to have a family.”

Merisu blushed again. “Not necessary,” she whispered. “We already are...”

:eek: :eek: :eek:

Let us not forget that our heroine is expecting. Do elves get morning sickness? And just how long is the gestation period?

[The Saucepan Man]

Lara!

Drool ...!

Er ... I mean, cool! :rolleyes: ;)

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Nice one, Thenamir. Who else but the Plunderer of Sepulchres would appear to one so versed in the arcane arts as Gateskeeper? Of course, this raises the question: how many different geek sex symbols can we write into this island? Unfortunately I don't know which pulp TV and video game characters most appealed to my nerdy female counterparts, so I suppose Esty's on her own with any temptation that Merisu encounters. I wonder if the Music of Holding could be used as a siren song, or whether lift music is more appropriate.

That unexpected epic back-story is going to be a tough act to follow, Saucepan. I'm glad that you've been inspired to join in. I like the Liquidator, meaning that he sounds like a decent enough sort of chap if you get on the right side of him. I just hope that my crew left their business affairs in good order when they set sail.

I'll see if I can do some sort of meeting between Gatesey and my sub-par mariners by the end of the week. It's great to see the steamroller of misadventure that is REB once more set brakeless amid the priceless terracotta warriors of world mythology.

[Thenamir]

Thanks, all, for the kind words on my latest offering. For those who might like to use Tara in upcoming posts, here's a bit of background on her character.

I envision Tara as being something like a combination of traits found in two characters of Star Trek fame -- Data, and Seven of Nine. She's not quite human, though she aspires like Data to be more than she is. She was created, not unlike Saruman's Uruks or Borg drones, to serve her master (in this case, Mogul) with the purpose of "recruiting" (read: tempting unto damnation) unwary souls into Mogul's service. Hence, while she is well versed in the arts of temptation, she is a bit unsophisticated in most other areas of social interaction.

As mentioned in the post, she has special access to the odd forms of communication in Muddled-Mirth -- O-mail/GPS, and a "network" of sorts that connects these servants of Mogul, not unlike the Borg Collective. Gateskeeper has "rewired" her now so that she is no longer beholden to the ISN (Incubus-Succubus Network, coming soon to an earring-channel near you!), but she is now dependent on our intrepid band to help her integrate back into what passes for "normal Muddled-Mirthian society."

Aside from the obvious Star Trek references, I could see connections to Eliza Doolittle/My Fair Lady, with Gateskeeper as Professor Henry Higgins?

[The Saucepan Man]

I like the Liquidator, meaning that he sounds like a decent enough sort of chap if you get on the right side of him.The right side being solvent and free of any debt. But Emu help anyone who owed any money to Mogul Enterpises LLC. Hmm, I wonder who that might implicate ...

For those who might like to use Tara in upcoming posts, here's a bit of background on her character.Although it tends not to be her character that interests those who are interested in her, if you get my meaning ... :rolleyes: ;)

I would, however, note that the character upon which Tara is based is of the English aristocracy, was born in Wimbledon and educated at Gordonstoun (Prince Charles' Alma Mater), is a seasoned explorer and artifact collector and an athlete extraordinaire, likes scaling dangerously precipitous cliffs and jumping rivers of molten lava, and is pretty handy (with both hands) with munitions of various types.

She also tends to shoot dumb animals, along with the odd villainous henchmen, rather a lot.

Not that I know much about her ... :rolleyes:

[Thenamir]

Thanks for the added info, Saucy, I never played much video in my ill-spent youth, and none of the Tomb Raider series. Good to know.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

A brief "hi" from the land of Far Far Away - it's fun to read the posts on both the game and discussion threads! Detailed comments would take a good deal of internet time and expense, so please accept a simple "thanks" to all. I shall do my best to finish writing and to post for Hal soon.

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

I've always thought that My Fair Lady missed a great opportunity for a man to create his ideal woman and then discover one of the following.

a.) The fundamental contradictions inherent in his ideals have given her multiple personality disorder.
b.) His ideal woman finds him physically, intellectually and ideologically repugnant.
c.) He has created a monster, which must be destroyed. (I call this the Mary Shelley ending)
d.) Her new discovery of a wider intellectual world has introduced her to the campaign for Women's Suffrage, which causes her to question his right to determine her social role.
e.) As above, but she becomes a radical Marxist and rebels against the social mores of an obsolete and corrupt bourgeoisie. Perhaps in conjunction with e.
f.) He has imagined the last three months owing to hitherto unsuspected hereditary insanity.
g.) Two words: Cthulhu phtagn

I point this out only in case some of my alternative endings are more entertaining than the real one.

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

First contact has been made between the parties on the island. Obviously I'll edit out any misuses of character that I may have introduced, but hopefully I haven't.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Sorry it's taking me so long to fill my save, folks - now that the internet is finally working again here, I sat down and typed my post, and it disappeared. :( I shall try again in the hope that it will work this time.

[Thenamir]

Cthulhu phtagn Thanks Squatter for that reference -- it forced me to do something I've left undone for some years - improving my cultural literacy by doing some investigative reading on H.P. Lovecraft and the whole Cthulhu mythos.

And while I'm at it, your latest post is up to your usual standard of excellence. It disheartens me, somewhat, to see people writing Gateskeeper better than I do myself. Great work!

EDIT: I see that our Gormlessar has been caught in a wyn-win situation. :D Good ones, Esty!

[Bêthberry]

What a pity Esty has limited internet access just at this particular juncture in the story. Why, I can imagine that Rim would have taken three posts at least to explore Gormlessar's temptations with WynWyn. ;)

As for the rest of ye, I suspect your mutual admiration society hardly needs commendations from me. :D

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

On the contrary, I welcome adulatory plaudits from all quarters. The above are simply provided as examples of the sort of response we expect to receive. Impertinent suggestions of mutual ego-massaging, on the other hand, will be taken simply as evidence that genius is seldom appreciated. I might even have to write a poem about how cruel and unfeeling is a world in which the most profound work of one's heart is received merely as vulgar entertainment for the beguiling of an idle hour. That'll show you.

I've just caught up with recent developments in the saga. Great post, Esty, particularly since it must have occupied some of your holiday. I see that you've managed to write in another of your hobbies by finally revealing to the world the dark art of Quiltomancy. You might have guessed that I particularly enjoyed the king-sized destiny revealed to Halfullion. Wynwyn is funny in modern English, but possible Old English renderings include 'Pleasure-woman' and 'Best of delights'. A joke to gladden a philologist's heart.

The increasingly extended epic of my internet connection continues. I'm reliably informed that I'm connected, but since I haven't been sent my modem or connection details that's rather academic. These problems should be sorted out by next week at the latest, which may mean dubious benefits for other areas of the forum than REB.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

It disheartens me, somewhat, to see people writing Gateskeeper better than I do myself.

Thena, that is simply a sign of the excellence of the character you created - he's fun to write for!

Squatter, I'm delighted to hear that I unknowingly inserted a philological joke into my post - usually the things that are interpreted from words and passages I've written without intending anything turn out to be risqué.

Bb, as to the unused possibilities of the Wynwyn situation - any Tolkien fan knows that the most interesting debates concern those things that were not written! :D

I am currently concentrating on the paper comparing Tolkien's biography to his 'Leaf' and 'Smith' tales, but I shall do my best to take an excursion to Muddled Mirth sometime this week for the continuation of the story.

As to my useage of quilting in place of banner embroidery - well, to speak with Spock, "It was only logical!" I am Arwen's heir, not Arwen herself... :p

[Bêthberry]

Bb, as to the unused possibilities of the Wynwyn situation - any Tolkien fan knows that the most interesting debates concern those things that were not written! :D



Well, I know how Ulmo/Legolas used to chastise you over your many vacations and holidays and absences, and, knowing how he does not pay much attention to the RPG section, where you are mainly active, I thought you would feel a sad, momentary loss if you received no teasing at all. :D

As for unwritten parts, I suppose this now means that we may speculate on whether Merisuwyniel will ever have wings or not, being the angel she is? :eek:

[Bêthberry]

On the contrary, I welcome adulatory plaudits from all quarters. The above are simply provided as examples of the sort of response we expect to receive.

Dearie me! I would have expected that you of all people, Squatter, might have appreciated a comedic aesthetic in which a response ran contrary to what you expected to receive. You have been too long absent to appreciate how we get and spend our amusement.


Impertinent suggestions of mutual ego-massaging, on the other hand, will be taken simply as evidence that genius is seldom appreciated. I might even have to write a poem about how cruel and unfeeling is a world in which the most profound work of one's heart is received merely as vulgar entertainment for the beguiling of an idle hour. That'll show you.

A tome or two in heroic couplets? The Rape of a Frock! The Eminense gris might make even a Pope take note.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Brilliant post, Saucy! You gave Denimthor his motivation - and us a time limit, I guess! Now we will have to finish and wrap this RPG within the two weeks stipulated by Mssr. Fastbuck (love the Hobbit name!). ;)

I need to reread it at leisure to appreciate the full extent of the parodic elements, but I would like to mention "curiouser and curiouser", "the large black boots favoured by the physicians of Mahrten" :cool: , and "his horse having been clamped", just for a start.

Oh, and obviously, the Proctor who likes to gamble is destined to become a running joke - maybe Kuru will expand on that later on...


I am pondering whether or not to include the temptations of the Squire and of Gravendil - it may be wise to leave a save for them, just in case, but perhaps it's not necessary to spell out every adventure of every character on every island, is it? :eek:

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

but perhaps it's not necessary to spell out every adventure of every character on every island, is it?
Of course it is And by 'it is', obviously I mean 'you must'. Unless, of course, we simply gloss over the issue with some hackneyed plot device and call it satire.

There was altogether too much silliness in the last post for me to put my finger on the best bit. Suffice it to say that I'm a sucker for spurious legal firms whose partners have silly names. It's also nice to have some sort of target to miss: it makes stumbling around randomly much more interesting.

So Kuruharan's joining us, is he? I look forward to the eradication of the last shred of sanity from this excursion with morbid glee.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Oh dear, must I then conjure up a temptation post for Gravendil? I was going to tactfully gloss over anything that could tarnish the perfect conjugal bliss of my main characters.

Anyone want to write one for the Squire? He had the hots for Pimpi back in the olden days, so maybe a furry-footed floozy would catch his eye.

[Thenamir]

I might be persuaded to write for Windsor, given a day or two, but not on an ongoing basis. Gateskeeper is enough for me to handle.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Thena, that would be just fine! I don't expect anyone to write for Windsor regularly - he's more or less an NPC who stays in the story by virtue of having pledged himself to Gravlox/Gravendil's service in Part 2. But if we are to milk this part of the plot for all of its possibilities, it would help me greatly to have him taken on by others occasionally.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

I finally have an idea for Gravendil and am working on that post, hoping to have it finished and up sometime this weekend - provided the parodic research doesn't take me longer than anticipated.

I have a few ideas for Squire Windsor's new, improved character: he's trying his best to be helpful, though he tends to be clumsy about it, for example. I've also thought that he could have an unconscious remnant of rivalry with Vogy left, so tries to create poetry, along very simple, hobbity lines - limericks, perhaps, or such works of genius as:I think that I shall never see
A lass as lovely as Pimpi perhaps. He could also be a fount of rustic wisdom, along the lines of Gaffer Gamgee. Feel free to use or ignore any of these ideas when writing for him - you may just have better ones!

[The Saucepan Man]

I feel rather guilty at leaving my poor character to fend for himself. He has become somewhat of an orphan ... :( ;)

Still, Denimthor and co are likely to keep me as occupied as I can be, so I am afraid that he will have to fend for himself.

I thoroughly approve your ideas, though, Esty. :D

[Kuruharan]

So Kuruharan's joining us, is he? I look forward to the eradication of the last shred of sanity from this excursion with morbid glee.

We aim to please.

A glorious (and debased) introduction to an old friend will be coming...sometime in the next few days (maybe tonight if I can find the time).

Don't wait for me if you have some burning idea...in fact, if some other story posts could happen it might help with the dramatic tension.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

No need for guilt feelings, Saucy - I think we'll have lots of fun with Windsor.

By popular request (well, Squatter is popular, isn't he?! ;) ) I have written a post for Gravendil's temptation. I hope you enjoy it!

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Well played that mostly redeemed once-Orc. That calling card has the look of a future plot element to me, though. You have a way with disturbing images, Esty; but I suppose Gravy's at a difficult stage in his transformation when we can expect him to be swayed by... exotic tastes.

I'm ready to start knocking up another post, but I'm not sure what the plan is from here on in. Are we staying on the lust island until the arrival of Kuruharan's character(s), moving on to the next one, stopping for a quick barbecue on the beach, blowing up the island or what? As I recall, we have to wreak havoc in any place we visit; and so far we don't seem to have done that.

[Kuruharan]

My characters won't be appearing on the island. In fact, the main troupe probably won't encounter them for quite some time. They (well, for the foreseeable future "he") will be causing trouble elsewhere for a bit.

You may blow up the island whenever you like.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

After Thena's post for Windsor, I need only a short one to get Merisu and Gravendil back down. Then the Questers can unite with the saliors and leave the island for the next one. Whether indeed destruction is necessary remains debatable - just because we may have wreaked just a teensy bit of havoc once or twice in the past doesn't mean we have to leave every location in shambles, does it? :rolleyes:

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

That question doesn't even merit an answer. It merely remains to be seen how and why. I'm guessing that there's some sort of high-powered server in the heart of the place that runs on geothermal energy. If we can find a way of provoking the right flagrant power management error, we can probably make this place go up like Krakatoa on tabasco sauce.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Hmmm, since we have several islands ahead of us, we should try to find a way for each to have a unique end - perhaps to match the theme of the island? Punishment to fit the crime, so to speak.

In this case, your idea of a flaming end seems appropriate to the passionate spirit of the place - would you like to write that and our getaway?

[Bêthberry]

I see. Tolkien/Eru was satisfied with sinking an island and bending the world once, but you folks have to better that record. Practice makes perfect I guess. :D

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Well, it seems to me that I've got some of the greatest heroes of the age just hanging around the beach looking heroic, and Merisu is supposed to be the most beautiful woman this side of the Mediocre River. Perhaps too much sex appeal creates some sort of feedback that makes it all go horribly wrong. For added laughs, Our Heroine could destroy it unwittingly in true Mary Sue style. "Oh, but surely I can't possibly be that attractive" (winsome flutter of eyelashes); island sinks; divers alarums, etc.

[Thenamir]

I'm guessing that there's some sort of high-powered server in the heart of the place that runs on geothermal energy. If we can find a way of provoking the right flagrant power management error, we can probably make this place go up like Krakatoa on tabasco sauce...island sinks; divers alarums, etc. Squatter, you have obviously been watching too many James Bond films, or perhaps original-series Star Trek.

"Listen carefully, Norman -- I am lying!" :eek:

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

I suppose you've heard of the Dr. No danger wheel theory. My friends and I were drunk one night and we decided that the plant had a system that controlled the local level of danger, hence that massive wheel with 'DANGER' written above it. All Bond did was to turn the danger wheel all the way up to 'localised cataclysm' and his work was done. We have to use that idea somewhere.

[Thenamir]

Save for Windsor has been filled in. Some references might need editing for family-friendliness, but I considered them mild after reading of the great variable-length sword L'Enviey Piennhas in REB I.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

What a hilarious post, Thena! A great idea to use the Gandalf/Bilbo pipe scene from TH as inspiration! Now, smoking may not be politically correct these days, but since we are being true to Tolkien, I'm sure there can be no objection, can there? :smokin: As to the unusual combination of smoke rings, well, who's to prevent people from thinking what's on their mind. The offer of a hobbit hole to return to could be misinterpreted, of course, but again, that's original Tolkien!

Oh, and I love the Armstrong quote when he jumps off the rock! :D And the mixed proverbs...

This act will be difficult to follow, but I shall do my best to fill in my save this weekend.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

My save is filled in - it is fairly brief, just getting everyone to the ship. I wasn't able to include any explosive and/or destructive activity in it, so anyone who has a good idea is welcome to write something to that effect.

Though the Captain and his crew intend well, and the Questers want nothing more than to get home, we know, of course, that the next stop will not be M-M, but another island. How much time and sailing skill it takes to get there, and how the ship lands, is open to conjecture and to the writing skills of our team.

[Bêthberry]

A hilarious and well-timed extension of Thenamir's linguistic lubricity, Esty. Nice to see that you left the passionate isle intact. You know that saying, what goes around, comes around (or something like that). Who's to say that within the circles of this story you won't be back. :D

The saline seas obviously suggest a salacious but salutary slant upon this sequel's sport. And I'm certain you've hardly begun to enlarge the depths of the maritime score.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

You know how the saying goes, Bb: The opera ain't over until the fat lady sings. I wouldn't count too much on the island staying intact as long as Squatter's crew is still in the vicinity.

Unless, of course, we land on the same island every time and just don't realize it - like the four blind men who try to describe the elephant...

[Thenamir]

Unless, of course, we land on the same island every time and just don't realize it - like the four blind men who try to describe the elephant... Considering the sailing prowess (pun intended) of Meanderin, that's a distinct possibility. Still, the Squatterian supposals suggested above seem too good to pass up.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Considering the sailing prowess The prow is female??

[Thenamir]

Of course -- the wife of a stern husband!

EDIT:Thenamir's linguistic lubricity
While I thank you for increasing my use of dictionary.com, any salaciousness is in the mind of the reader. :p

[Bêthberry]

any salaciousness is in the mind of the reader. :p

Oh noes! Thena is edging towards Fordim's Reader's Camp of Interpretation. It's a slippery slope, first to grant salaciousness to the reader. :D

[Estelyn Telcontar]

I was just reminded of something we could use in this game, though I don't yet know when and where. Anyone remember the PC game "Monkey Island"?

insult swordfighting (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Insult_swordfighting)

I wish I still had the game - I bet there are lots of things we could quote in this quest!

[Thenamir]

A complete list of insults and comebacks from the game can be found here. (http://www.worldofmi.com/gamehelp/insults/mi1.php)

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Great post, Kuruharan. It's nice to see that Chrysophylax fell on his feet after the last outing, combining the elements of live performance and torture that he loves so much. I know it's cruel to enjoy Denimthor's financial prostration, but I don't care.

I know I promised certain people a post last night, but although I have just over a thousand words, substantial sections of the proposed plot remain unwritten. I'll make every effort to get it finished tonight so that we can all have a double dose of REB to take us into the weekend.

[The Saucepan Man]

Great post, Kuruharan. :D

I know it's cruel to enjoy Denimthor's financial prostration, but I don't care.I have a feeling that you may come, in retrospect, to think of it as just ...

... the proposed plotWhat is this thing called plot that you speak of? ;)

With regard to the fate of the island of temptation, it occurred to me that there is property belonging to Mogul Bildur Enterprises LLC in situ. The Liquidator might be interested in that. Whether the island disappears before his minions get there looks like it will depend on Squatter's putative post. I would, however, remind you that destroying liquidation assets is a serious offence. :p

Oh, and as Thena reminded me, one of those assets is currently travelling with the party.

Finally, I just realised that an opportunity has probably been lost to have a Dwarf spot a plane from the island (it being a fantasy island) ...

[Thenamir]

one of those assets is currently travelling with the party.And she has one of the finest assets in Muddled Mirth, too. :eek:

[Kuruharan]

It's nice to see that Chrysophylax fell on his feet after the last outing, combining the elements of live performance and torture that he loves so much.

It must be remembered that Chrysophylax thinks that he is truly talented and that everybody loves his singing. It is his dwarves who have behind his back concocted this scheme to use his singing as a punishment for defaulters.

He would be staggered to learn what is really going on.

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Now that is a dangerous game. Does C. have any albums out?

destroying liquidation assets is a serious offence.

Is it, by Jove? That puts an entirely different complexion on matters. I shall be forced to revise my next post accordingly: say ten per-cent more mayhem and a shade more evidence left behind.

[The Saucepan Man]

I shall be forced to revise my next post accordingly: say ten per-cent more mayhem and a shade more evidence left behind.I was rather hoping that you would say that ... ;)

[Thenamir]

Fantastic! You've outdone yourself, Squatter. I especially liked using Tara as R2-D2, but the whole post is a milestone in the realms of REB-dom. Can't rep you enough on this one.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Wonderful posts, guys!

Kuru, you invented the karaoke prison - a stroke of genius! You also showed the Proctor actually gambling; my favorite quote was the "Grundor has no Queen-Mother" - hilarious! Thanks for your prequel to your later cameo - it's good to have you along for the ride.

Squatter, brilliant post again! How clever to find a connection with a previous post that the rest of us had probably forgotten by now. Your handling of other characters (speaking for myself in this case, of Merisu and Gravendil) is excellent - I liked the "fancy talk" line! That, and "Merisuwyniel boldly and valiantly fluttered her eyelashes". :D (We need an eyelash-fluttering blonde smiley!) The discussion about the meaning of the words was great fun, as were Gatesy's attempts to crack the code. At any rate, you managed to achieve the total destruction of the island - if this story were ever published, maps would be unnecessary, as all locations would have perished by the end of the tale!

I think Squatter's post set a new record for length on a thread accustomed to lengthy epistles... :smokin:

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

You're too generous. Thenamir and I discussed a plot and I tried to work in as much of it as I could. He deserves credit for thinking of an argument about word meanings, along with several other elements in the narrative. If it's the longest post in REB history (which I doubt: Saucepan posted some monsters in the epic back-story for REB II), then it's just because I had a lot of ground to cover. There were a couple of times when I thought I'd never get the dratted thing finished at all.

I've left us out in the ocean somewhere, so the field's open for anyone who wants to get in the first description of the next island. I'm sorry that I didn't leave you the evidence I promised Saucepan. It's one of many defects in my post; I'm pretty sure that the sisadmîn of Bildûr had a remote logging system, or that our gallant heroes left behind some evidence of their identity that I forgot to mention.

[Thenamir]

We need an eyelash-fluttering blonde smiley!
Here you go, glad to oblige! :Merisu:
Alas, my admin powers are too weak to break thru the spell of protection BW has woven about the smiley cache, so he'll have to add it.

EDIT: For some reason I cannot make the smiley appear in the post, so you'll have to click one of the links. :(

EDIT EDIT: I figured it out, finally. Merisu is now one of the smilies! BW may kill me for this one, though.

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

How could BW possibly be annoyed with this face? :Merisu:

[Kuruharan]

He apparently wasn't.

:Merisu:

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Ooooh, I'm famous! :Merisu: - Well, at least my character is. Almost as good as having a smiley named after me, like Squatter's :smokin: !

Let's enjoy it while it lasts!

[Thenamir]

How could BW possibly be annoyed with this face?
Well, I can think of one reason -- the "Squatter" icon is only 201 bytes, while Merisu's is a bit over 3K. I tried every reduction algorithm I could come up with, but that's as small as I could make it.

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

If you edit all the posts in this thread to remove that information, then he may never find out. You might have to delete this one too, though. And erase his memory in case he's seen this thread over the past few days. And we might have to lock out the other ops while it happened: they're loose cannon to a man.

[Bêthberry]

Buh-u-u-u-u-t . . . I can't see the Merisu smilie here in Gondor. :( It is on some of the fora but not all of them.

Is this some kind of insidious segregation? Are there places a lady is not allowed? This will not do. It is not practical.

(On the other hand, I must say this is terribly sweet of you, Thena, and a lovely tribute to Esty's inspiration and contribution here. One of the nicest things that's ever happened on the Downs.) I just hope it won't lead to those werewolf addicts inundating you with demands for a Fenris Wolf smilie. :D

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Bb, I can get the Merisu smiley here: :Merisu:
Perhaps you need to refresh the page or something to get the newest one to work. Try colonMerisucolon, with : for my word 'colon'.

[Bêthberry]

Esty, when I go to reply on some forums, the Merisu smilie shows up in the smilie choice box. In other forums, she is not there.

Forums which show the Merisu smilie with the other smilies: Books, Novs and News, Movies, The Shire, Rohan, Announcements and Obits in the BD forum.

Forums where the Merisu smilie does not appear with the other smilies: Quiz Room, QQuotes, Mirth, New Silm, Gondor.

Coded conundrum fun, I suspect. ;)

But here's to using the long hand form:

:Merisu:

Nope, that doesn't work either for me, at least in Preview Post.

Methinks Thena is pulling my, er, keyboard fingers?

EDIT: In fact, the Merisu smilie does not show up (on my screen) in your post, even when I refresh.

[Thenamir]

I see Merisu's fluttering eyelashes in your post now, Bb. Not sure what the problem might be, but I'll look into it.

EDIT: I would never pull your keyboard fingers -- injuring them would deprive us of your elegant wit and wisdom. :D

EDIT EDIT: I changed the "list priority" on the smiley to the same number as the others. See if it works now in all the fora.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Thena, I went ahead and posted briefly, since I had a scene with my characters in my mind over the weekend. You'll probably want to carry on after that, since mine occurs directly after the destruction of the island. Should I have ruined anything you wanted to write, please let me know and I'll edit it to suit.

[Thenamir]

Absolutely no problem writing around your post, Esty. I deleted my save and posted after yours. We have now arrived at the next island, but have not yet disembarked. Please let me know if I have committed any intolerably heinous continuity errors...yeah, right. :Merisu:

[The Saucepan Man]

I was wondering how the small goat managed to avoid being eaten for so long ... ;)

Great post Thena. Nice to see Tara in action too. The shark-punching and non-geek dialogue was very much in keeping with what I would expect. Although I am sad to see no mention of her traditional 'marine adventure' skin-tight wet-suit/hot pants combo. :rolleyes: ;)

I have put up a save for a post that I have in mind. But it won't involve the Island-Hopping-Ship, so no need to wait for me.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Continuity?

*looks puzzled*

*shrugs*

Whatever that is - REB has no continuity, REB needs no continuity!

Thena, what a fabulus post! You had me laughing all the way - excellent use of Tara as a worthy addition to our little band of questers. I love the way you picked up on that old reference to the Puking Men and used it appropriately here. The painter's name and affliction sound vaguely familiar somehow... and what a fun new name for the ship! Love the geek talk and translations! And the punch line really takes the cake - great idea!

I look forward to your post, Saucy, and of course we need not wait. I'm in the midst of holiday weekend, with all the extra RL activities it involves, so won't be doing any writing till next week. Unless Squatter feels inspired in the meantime, consider the story temporarily becalmed.

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

I've used up two posts' worth of ideas. I think I'll just wait and see where Saucepan takes us before I start cudgelling my brains again.

Nice impromptu outboard motor there, Thena. Tara appears to be a useful person to have around, not to mention promising to prove an inexhaustable mine of Terminator references. Salvage laws being what they are, I think that the newly rechristened ship will be something of a hyper-sensitive issue, but enough of such foreshadowing. The joke once spoken can engender no suspense.

[Thenamir]

And so, anonymously hooded and cloaked, he set off on foot (his horse having been clamped) for the Wight Mountains.

Though I quite understand Esty's sentiments regarding continuity, I found the above statement about Deminthor's horse quite at odds with his earlier statement:

“No cousin of Isildur, however many times removed, has ever required a steed for transportation. You know our motto, ‘A Steeded Steward Shall Soon Succumb to Shadow.’”

Perhaps Denimthor, in his old age, is not quite the Stepper that Orogarn was.

[The Saucepan Man]

But Thena, the motto was, of course, a prophecy. For soon after taking a steed, the Steward did indeed succumb to Shadow ...

;)

[Thenamir]

I am in the midst of re-rereading REB2, in an attempt to format the text into something like a published book in Microsoft Word -- re-arranging the posts for better flow, adding real footnotes rather than end-of-post items, and correcting minor errors. I doubt that CT & Co. will ever let this really be published, but I thought it would be nice to have a copy saved and printed offline to read to my grandkids, should I live that long.

Nevertheless, I found this later quote that makes my former point rather moot:I have changed our motto: “Stewards of Grundor do it on the Porcelain Throne”. So, the whole horse thing is null and void. Look for a steed to follow shortly behind this message.

[Kuruharan]

Oooo...let me know when you finish that!

I have a feeling I will have to extricate Chrysophylax from an embarrassing situation after The Saucepan Man posts.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Thena, you're a brave man to take on a project like that! Of course I'm interested in the result when you have accomplished that Herculean task!

Speaking of mythological persons and happenings, I'm working on a landing post for the second island. This one will not have separate locations for the testing of each character, but one central Bacchanalia. The morning after can bring each character's resolution for future temperance - hopefully more permanent than such morning after resolutions usually tend to be!

In case you're wondering, the females won't be involved in this temptation. Merisu's hormones exempt her from such things - and we wouldn't want her testing the Elven drinking capacity of her future child(ren), would we?! The only other female of the group, Tara, is probably exempt too - unless Thena wants to give her an emotion chip to try out...

This is the island upon which to parody the movie drinking contest between Gimli and Legolas, by the way! I'm sure other similar scenes from books/movies/etc. will occur to you.

[Thenamir]

In REB II all involved will remember our run-in- with Underhill's cameo character, Eryy, son of Tait the Terrible. There is a reference to "two curious sigils" on his steel-mesh tunic, but the picture Unde provided is no longer available. In trying to come up with a replacement, I was struck with the following inspiration, posted for your enjoyment, which I was able to whip up in an hour or so of photoshopping.

EDIT: and while we're on the subject, I have almost finished with all the posts on forum-page 3 (of 8), and formatted in 12pt Times New Roman we're already up to 160+ printed pages of text. At this rate, the finished product will be something over 400 pages.

[Thenamir]

Well, I've finished the first pass of the pseudo-publishable REB II, and it comes out to a staggering 531 pages, not including the table of contents, the foreword (to which I hope all concerned will contribute) and the Prologue (comprised of The Tale of Mogul Bildur, Part I). Anyone interested in receiving a copy via e-mail please PM me. Bear in mind that the Word document is approximately 2.75 MB in size, so make sure you can receive such large attachments.

[The Saucepan Man]

Apologies for the delay in filling my Save. But, as I said, feel free to carry the story on as my proposed post will have no bearing on it just yet.

I have a feeling I will have to extricate Chrysophylax from an embarrassing situation after The Saucepan Man posts.Actually, I wasn't proposing to address that strand of the story in my post, so please feel free to continue it (indeed, I should be delighted if you would, as I am not exactly sure where to go with Chrys and Denny's current situation).

Bear in mind that the Word document is approximately 2.75 MB in size, so make sure you can receive such large attachments.I would be highly interested. But I think that may be too large for any of my home accounts. Is it possible to split it up?

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Wonderful, Thena! I'll have to check to see if such a large attachment will work for me. Maybe splitting would be a good idea. At any rate, thanks for all the time you put into that project! We did write a pretty big tome there!

Saucy, no problem - nothing's happening right now anyway, so no need to apologize or hurry. I'm assuming the menfolk are too busy carousing to report details of the org- I mean, feast. I hope Thena and Squatter will put in their two cents soon; otherwise, I'll post for my male characters in the next week or two.

[Thenamir]

I am not exactly sure where to go with Chrys and Denny's current situation
Oh my...I can see where that could open up a whole series of running jokes on the Denny's restaurant chain. For those of you in the *real* world (outside the USA), Denny's is a chain of diners best known for decent and reasonably-priced breakfasts. And notorious for hideous puns in naming some of the entrees. (One particular breakfast sandwich containing ham and two eggs-over-easy is listed on the menu as "Moons Over My Hammy". Ouch.)

And yes, it should be possible to break the narrative into separate "books", as Tolkien did with each volumne of LOTR. Let me know what the max attachment size is for your systems, and I will perform the necessary surgery.

[Kuruharan]

as I am not exactly sure where to go with Chrys and Denny's current situation

I'll see what I can do.

Denny's is a chain of diners best known for decent and reasonably-priced breakfasts.

They've also become known in recent years for slack (indeed, almost non-existant) service. A little over a month ago, I had the worst experience I've ever had in a restaurant at a Denny's.

[Kuruharan]

Wow! Just...Wow!

Amazing work.

Praise Thenamir with great praise!!!

[Thenamir]

I was just proof-reading (for the third time, and still finding mistakes), and I realized something. When I read the part of Grrralph, in my mind I hear the voice of Alan Rickman. :D

Never...call me 'Lurch.'

[Bêthberry]

Thena, I have a question about the formatting of this massive tome. Did you keep the post titles or were they omitted in order to create more flow in the prose?

Post titles weren't used often, but often enough they were a source of some merriment. Do they remain?

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Kuru, your new post is fabulously funny! The development of Chrysi's reactions from positive to negative is an amusing turn, and the last half of the post is just plain hilarious. Thanks for getting things moving again!

I hope to contribute to the main story line soon, in the hopes that Squatter and Thena will add their characters' point of view of the drinking party - or can't they see from under the table? ;)

[The Saucepan Man]

Kuru, your new post is fabulously funny!... not to mention a Lovecraftian board gamer's delight. :D

[Thenamir]

With the exception of entries from "The Very Secret Diary of Falafel", which required the title to explain the abrupt changes in voice and format, I have omitted the post titles in the interest of maintaining a book-ish look to the document. But you're right, Bb, there were some keepers in those titles. I will review the posts and see where I can incorporate them in some consistent fashion.

I believe that I did, in a couple of cases, reference a post title in a chapter title, but the chapter titles are mostly my own inventions.

I have one last round of edits to perform (and post titles to review now, <sigh>) before sending out a draft copy for revisions and corrections to all concerned. I sent out a preliminary review copy to Kuruharan before it was really ready, and will forward a revised copy to him once this round of revisions is complete.

For those who cannot receive 3MB attachments, I will look into the possibility placing a downloadable copy on the Downs website, with access instructions sent privately on request. I want to avoid a mass rush to download copies of this monstrosity which would overtax our bandwidth capabilities.

[Bêthberry]

Oh, dear, I didn't mean to cause you more work, Thena. :(

I was simply curious about how you handled the editing. Did you try to meld everyone's , er, "style" into a more consistent, um, "tone" or did you leave the ideosyncracies? I've always been able to read a, say, Squatter post as different from, say, a Sauce post.

It is amazing, isn't it, how posts and threads 'translate' into pages. I remember printing out the old Rohan game (because I'm a oldstyle bookie who still found it easier to cross reference and page back in book form) (and besides it is so much fun being able to write marginalia) and was shocked to discover that it was 50 pages long. Fifty pages!

I wonder, would LotR or The Silm have been longer if Tolkien had had a computer to work with? Or would CT have been out of a job?

Hilarious work, Kuru. As I said in the rep, I lurve the dial tone. Now you've got me wondering what kind of ring tone to expect on a REB phone.

[Thenamir]

No, Bb, it's not much more work, really – I’ve found that I incorporated most of the post titles in some fashion already.

And I would not dare presume to rewrite the brilliance exhibited in the originals. Most of my editing was to rearrange the order of posts to reduce the number of times you encounter various forms of the phrase “While [event X in a prior post] was going on, [character Y] was [doing something in the same timeframe].” In a number of cases, I would actually split posts into pieces so that I could interleave simultaneous events, thus eliminating most of the times where the reader would have to make the mental time-shift, unless such a shift was intentional. But in doing so, I tried to make sure that when I separated a post into sections that all the sections were present-and-accounted-for in the final version.

I also corrected (or perhaps I should say Microsoft Word did the corrections) spelling errors. In very, very rare instances where a descriptive word was used multiple times in close proximity I would substitute a (hopefully creative) synonym for one of them, but I will certainly defer to any requests of the original authors to restore any such alterations.

I should have the latest edits available within a couple of days. All who wish to receive a copy, let me know via PM, along with your e-mail if you can receive large attachments.

Thanks for all your support in this project!

[Thenamir]

It is now full three weeks since our last post in the main thread of REB Le Troisième. I could shift blame and say I was waiting for the baliffs to arrive, as foretold in the last save, but it is time to move forward. I will be giving the next post from Gateskeeper a hearty attempt in the next few days. I just wanted to give a nudge to all the rest as well. :D

[Estelyn Telcontar]

You've spent those weeks toiling at a labour none of us would have tackled, Thena! Your time was not only well spent to our advantage, but used to further the cause of the Fellow/Galship.

I have also used the past weeks for Tolkien business, what with preparing my paper on the 'Autobiographical Tolkien' for the seminar lecture, along with the matching quilt. Ha! How many Tolkienists, even though they be much more learned than I, can boast of that combination?!

Unfortunately, it looks like we have temporarily lost Squatter - he hasn't been around much in the past several weeks. I left the males at a drinking revel; it would be great if you post, Thena - it doesn't have to be lengthy - then I can post for one or more of my male characters. Alas for the many irons I have in the fire at the moment...

[Kuruharan]

what with preparing my paper on the 'Autobiographical Tolkien' for the seminar lecture, along with the matching quilt. Ha! How many Tolkienists, even though they be much more learned than I, can boast of that combination?!

We grovel pathetically at your glorious feet... ;)

[The Saucepan Man]

Well, I've been doing Tolkienish things too ... er ... Werewolfing counts, doesn't it ...? :rolleyes: ;)

That SAVE weighs on my shoulders like an overweight Aerophaunt. Um ... I'm working on it.

Btw, Thena, I have some suggested amendments to some of my contributions to REB2 (based largely on subsequent name changes which were not carried through). I haven't had a chance to read through the entire manuscript yet, though. Should I e-mail them to you now or wait until I have read more?

[Estelyn Telcontar]

@Kuru: :Merisu:

[Thenamir]

SpM: In re-reading (several times!) the manuscript, I think we were all guilty at times of giving new parody names to items/people/places which had been named already in earlier posts. I thought long and hard about trying to reconcile these names, but eventually took Esty's sage advice: REB has no continuity...REB needs no continuity.
That being said, I will accept any corrections or updates that we-the-authors deem necessary or even just desireable. When sending along proposed changes, be sure to indicate the page number to help me find and make the changes. I am maintaining a copy of the original (sent out) and a master-update copy, so I can reference original page numbers.

Also, if you haven't already contributed your entry to the Bio section in the foreword (Thanks, Kuruharan!) please do so when you can.

Thanks all!

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Guilty - I will send you that info ASAP, Thena. I haven't been able to proofread yet in these hasty days, but I will do my best soon. And yes, not all parody names need to be unified - the changes were part of the fun!

I have a question to all authors:

A German friend who has read some of REB asked me to do a reading in connection with her lecture on Mary Sue fan fiction at the annual meeting of the German Tolkien society this summer. She thinks it's hilarious and would be an amusing way to illustrate her points. Any objections? It's not public and not commercial.

Speak soon, or forever hold your peace.

[Thenamir]

I have no objections, and would love to hear about it afterwards!

EDIT: I am reminded of discovering one of my own renaming faux-pas -- I found that Diamond had named "the swinging city of Gondola", where I had mentioned that one of Gateskeeper's Loyer-associates was present at the "fall of Mandolin".

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Can't we keep both, Thena? :Merisu: I find both too good to delete! Besides, Tolkien had a multitude of names for characters and sometimes places, so why can't we?!

[Kuruharan]

I don't have any particular objections, although I'm curious about what selections she'd make.

I also advise against reading this at work. It’s been years since I really read it and so it is sort of fresh for me again.

Many bouts of poorly suppressed laughter don't endear one to one's co-workers...

[Thenamir]

Can't we keep both, Thena?But of course. A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of small minds, and none of us is small-minded. :D

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Sorry, ladles and jellyspoons; the last few weeks have been ridiculously busy and I've not been up to doing any writing. On top of various other problems, I've managed to delete the entire contents of my computer's hard drive, including all of my connection details, and I've not yet got round to setting it all back up again. I am still checking my PMs, though.

Expect some sort of contribution in the near future.

Edit: I have not forgotten you, comrades. A post is in progress, and should be complete this weekend.

[Bêthberry]

See now, here's the very reason why, or at least a major reason why, I declined to join in this voyage out. I suspected that the ship would rapidly become becalmed and I knew that I just couldn't stand the suspense.

:rolleyes: :p

[Kuruharan]

ZZZZZZZZZ *sputter* ZZzzzz.....whaaaa...?

Did somebody say something?

Hellooo...?

[Estelyn Telcontar]

REB is alive and - well, alive. Consider my brief post as First Aid while waiting for a full cure... :Merisu:

btw, Saucy - there's a five month old save back a few posts - do you remember what you wanted to use it for? ;)

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Merry Christmas to all who aren't posting here! My post owes a good deal to Louisa May Alcott, to whom I apologize abjectly.

Let us hope for an Entish revival in the New Year!

[Bêthberry]

Let us hope for an Entish revival in the New Year!

Hoom huuum. Does that "Entish" mean a revival that's not hasty?


:D :smokin:

[Estelyn Telcontar]

"Hasty" is certainly not the word I would use to describe this RPG! :D

[Estelyn Telcontar]

My last post ends with a "meanwhile" - any of you guys want to fill that with content? If not, I will be putting up a new post very soon. If by my triple post I can save this story's life, I will. You have my pen!*


*The last I heard, it's supposed to be mightier than the sword...


edit: I posted a "meanwhile", though that does not mean another can't be done. Let me know if you have something. Oh, and much of my post was lifted verbatim from RotK, plus a bit from TT - those passages fit the situation so well that I really couldn't improve on the words!

[Bêthberry]

Methinks there was another source that was lifted, if not uplifted. ;)

A fitting way to find a future for the Ents from the Kween of Parodee. :cool:

[piosenniel]

For the time being, this thread will be stashed safely in Elvenhome.

It may be resurrected upon request.

~*~ Pio