taking over the world

[the guy who be short]

hello,
if you were going to take over the world, how would you do it in a lord of the rings style way, and what would the outcomes be? i havent thought how yet, but i would crush people to make hobbits, and set them on fire for balrogs

[Arafangwen]

I don't quite understand, but I would call all the elves(tall, graceful people?) and men(normal people), form an alliance, and then destroy anyone who would oppose us, I guess....
And something else, way of track here, but can you get into Elronds Guestbook? Or LETS DO INTERVIEWS!!!, I can't seem to get into either one of those and a few others. Help!!!

[the guy who be short]

i mean like how would you take over the world in a lord of the rings style way. ie, using trained eagles, bowmen or swordsmen. also, using flamethrowers as dragons. and then, how would you change the world which you had conquered to make it more lotr like, ie, squashing people to make hobbits

[Arvedui III]

Hehe, funny idea.
Well, I would start off by useing balrogs and dragons to set fire to everything, then have my army of hobbits sack all the world capitals while my army of elves and men attack everything else. But that's just me. smilies/wink.gif smilies/biggrin.gif smilies/evil.gif

[Airehiriel]

Yes, Arafangwen, I have had this problem too! All the threads I really want to look at, I CAN'T!!! Now I'll never know what people think about Elves farting!

Oh, yes, taking over the world...hmmm, let's see now. All I would really need would be a gigantic eyeball, and a ring...Wouldn't that work?

[the guy who be short]

no, airehiriel, eyeballs cant wear rings.
i would squash bearded people (one id taken over) to make dwarves. also, i would torture people to make orcs. then i would form an army to battle against the orcs, and kill them all. then id make more orcs... im so evil smilies/evil.gif

[the phantom]

Well, I'd love to share my ideas, but I don't want to give them away (I seriously am going to take over the world). smilies/wink.gif

Well, maybe I could at least give a hint. Let's just say that my idea includes a lot of fruit loops, nuclear warheads, and duct tape.

After I take it over, I'll enslave all the great scientists of the world and make them build a machine to send me back in time to Middle Earth, where I will kick Morgoth's butt, marry Luthien, and attempt to defeat a dwarf in a limbo contest.

[Arafangwen]

Now that I understand what this is supposed to define or whatever...... Hmmmmmm... Let's see here.....

I think I would get Tim the tool man, Whoopie Goldberg, Staccie Orrico, Orlando Bloom, Eddie Murphy, Sean Connery, Jennifer Garner, Vin Deisel, Flipper...... I guess I shouldn't tell you what I would do after I got everyone on my list in one place...... smilies/evil.gif

[Airehiriel]

Dang it, guy who be short! I thought I had it all worked out, and so simple too!!

*sniff* Why did you have ruin my hopes?!

[One Axe to Rule them All]

Let's just say that it involves duct tape, squirrels, and lot's and lot's of Corn...

[the phantom]

Well, I think this thread has proved how amazing duct tape is. Two people have already named it as a prime ingredient in their world conquest plans. I'm surprised Sauron didn't use it.

[Arvedui III]

I think that Sauron lost because he didn't have duct tape. I also, plan on using duct tappe in the creation of my armies of hobbits and elves. It will start in Lithuania, so beware... smilies/evil.gif

[the guy who be short]

oh yeah, arvedui? well ill be in latvia and estonia, so just you watch out.
i would pay scientists to give life to trees. the ents (obviously under my control) would then start attacking all major, minor, and non countries.

[Ainaserkewen]

I'd love to run the world! I'd fix all the problems and heal all the hurts. But I'd have to have someone to slap me if I got too power hungry.
I think I'd start small, with hobbits and show them wonderful technology and become their leader. Then the dwarves and show them how happy the hobbits are(already are, whatever) and word will spread to men and they'll want my friendship, and once I rule them, I'll speak to the remaining elves and get them to join. Elves, Men, Dwarves and Hobbits, whole will dare oppose me? No one, because I'll invite them to join my commonwealth.

[Sillabub]

hee hee hee! If I ruled the world I'd just go with the simplest route and plunge everything back into the middle-earth age an stuff(and if middle earth isn't an age or whatever I'll settle for the dark/castle age)
and I would RULE OVER THEM ALL! MUAHAHAHA!oh yeah, and I would hire a pet gollum to entertain me by singing the fish song...and get the humans to re-create CATS and such...and all in all the stupid rednecks of society would be kicked off the planet!

[the guy who be short]

ive thought in more detail:

ill dress up in a blue sequin dress (yes, im a boy, i know, but he wears one, i think) and declare that i was manwe, and to obey me. when the men in white suits came, i would get my trained eagles, genetically engineered to me very large, to attack them. then i would squash them to make hobbits and dwarves. also, i would superglue some of their ears into points to make elves.
then i would equip them with bows and swords, and tell them to worship me, reading to them from lotr to convert them, then convincing them i was manwe.

i would slowly take over first bedfordshire, then england, then britain in this way. then i would have 52 million tolkienite elves, hobbits and dwarves behind me (the race of men is weak)

i would get sapphires and make a new robe
out of them, like manwe.

the rest is simple. aeroplane + flamethrower = dragon.

i know dragons are meant to be evil, but hey, im manwe, i do what i want. they fly in my sky, they follow me.

then i would basically go and takke over the world and have a mansion build on everest. all of europe would be turned into a massive shire, all modern industrial things destroyed, and lots of holes made.

the dwarves could live in mountains, and the elves wherever they want. parents could choose whether they want their baby to be a dwarf, elf, or hobbit. anyone who opposes me is turned into an orc, and roasted by a "dragon".

[The Evenstar]

Hey!

W-a-y off topic here, but just in response to Arafangwen's post, I can't seem to get into some posts either. When I click them, they say soemthing like "No member profile for member number: (random number is shown).

Why is this?

[Meela]

Those posts are fixed. It was my member number (00004510) which got stuck, but i am now unstuck and the posts are accessible. It was every post i had answered to.

I would gather an army of dwarves, dragons, and spiteful rangers armed with mouldy peanuts and minature catapults.

[Niluial]

Ha ha these are funny. I don’t what I would do.. I would seduce the guy who has the ring ( I don’t know who would have it after Frodo) and steal it from him and take power.. ok that was dumb but hey it was a try! smilies/rolleyes.gif

[the guy who be short]

on second thoughts maybe ill just get durin, my trusty bowmerang, and shoot everybody in sight. it would just slightly hurt them, seeing as durin and my arrows, gimli, dain and thorin, are home made. for more about them, see:here (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic&f=2&t=002192)
i have so much free time

[the guy who be short]

come on, eople-pay! we're geniuses, and i know lots of us are writing novels... surely you eople-pay can think of some clever wayz to take over the world... we cant let this thread die... fall into decay... perish... smilies/frown.gif
SHOW YOUR TALENT, EOPLE-PAY!

[One Axe to Rule them All]

what about taking a group of midgets and forcing them to take a ring to the top of some mountain in hawii and throw it into the volcano while the whole time being hunted by big bikers with axes

[Everdawn]

Well there is only one way of course... by getting the ring and a band of Evil Squirrels!.. mehmehmeh

[the guy who be short]

you people need inspiration. squirrels??

[Rose Cotton]

Posibility #1:

Create a One Ring and then distrubute rings to all the world leaders slowly turning them into my faithfull Wraiths.

Posibility #2:

Force everyone to eat mushrooms that are highly addictive and turn them all into hobbits.

And if that dosn't work I'll just cover the whole world with duct tape.

Sam: So what are we going to do tomorrow night Mr. Frodo?

Frodo: The same thing we do every night Sam. Try to take over the world.

(Pinky and the Brain rip off)

[ElenCala Isil]

Sam: So what are we going to do tomorrow night Mr. Frodo?

Frodo: The same thing we do every night Sam. Try to take over the world.


hehe that'd make a good tv show.. pinky and the..ermm, frodo

I would take over the world by.. uhhh turning everyone into hobbits, and making them drink pints of wraith-ifying ale, making them my servants!

after that.. it's all a blur.. smilies/biggrin.gif smilies/tongue.gif

[Luthien_ Tinuviel]

Phantom, did you say you would marry me? Hmm... I'm already married to Beren. Sorry.

Anyway, I would take over the world by making LOTR mandatory reading in every school everywhere. And then everyone would take field trips to see the movies, which would also be broadcast on TV every Christmas. Once I had created a significant group of LOTR fans, I would make them all join my army. We would ride giant metallic blue rats and start our world conquest in the Czech Republic (or New Zealand, whichever is more convinient). In New Zealand, I would gather all the rugby players and make them join my army, too. Being an LOTR would be a good quality for them to have. So once my band of fans, rats, and rugby-players (not to mention all my insane friends, I seem to befriend people who are hopelessly crazy more often than not) was ready, we would give everyone fake One Rings and convince them that every ring was a real Ring of Power which would give them world domination and so forth smilies/wink.gif . Once everyone was throughly obssessed with their rings, there would be a ring tax, and this is how I would get money. Once I had taken over the whole world, my friends and I would have a big party (sure, all you BDers can come, too, because I trust you'll join my army of LOTR-freaks), and everyone would be forced to grow potatoes in their backyard! I'm evil, aren't I? smilies/biggrin.gif smilies/wink.gif smilies/biggrin.gif

[Helkahothion]

I would buy all the elven daughters with glass beeds and train them to become warriors. Then I will take them to the beautiyparlor. No one will resist beautifull elf woman.

And if they will do it?
I will open fire.

The have steel armor and tanks and heatseeking bombs and nuclear weapons against me?
Mwuahahahaha. I laugh at that. For I hold the most powerfull weapon of all:The pants attacking monkey of Doom!!!

SO I'm pretty wel fortyfied hehehehe. And ofcourse let us not forget Ducktape.

[Wolf Larson]

First I will need 100,000 Elven women. 200,000 Dwarves. 300,000 Ents. And 5 loyal Wizards. The rest is a northern sweep. A couple hobbits couldn't hurt for good measure.

[Tinuviel the Nightingale]

I would seduce the guy who has the One Ring and get him to offer it to me and when he does, I will snatch the oppurtunity and go blue Galadriel style!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!
Don't worry I will be a fair ruler.

[the guy who be short]

you people are really insane. i read somewhere that all barrowdowners are insane, and i know i am. however, the percentage of insane peope is starting to scare me a little. well, at least youre all original!

[purplefluffychainsaw]

I would do it the same way as Gilmor (Who is the ULTIMATE bad girl) - Start small and work upwards! First the golden wood would fall (After Galadriel had left) then Mirkwood. With my army of Elves I would then take the area around the lonely mountain. then Rohan would fall and after that Gondor. Finally Rivendell and the westen lands....

[Everdawn]

you people need inspiration. squirrels??
--------------------


Never underestimate the squirrels...

[Maegaladiel]

Okay, here goes nothing:

First, I would collect a huge supply of food. Mostly potatoes.

Next, I would get two really hot elves (a male and female) to faint in front of the White House. Then, while every government official and security person was trying to look the most heroic to save the hot elves and impress them, I'd run into the white house and lock the doors.

Then I'd send my army of hobbits to eat all the food within a seven-hundred mile radius, and send my eagle army to cut the power to every major city in the world. Then, VIOLA! I control the country's food supply, and, using my potatoes as crude batteries, controll the world's electricty as well. It's as easy as that. More to come.

[Luthien_ Tinuviel]

Okay, this is off topic, but Maegaladiel, I love your sig!

[Meela]

*sticks up her hand*

The answer to that sig is me smilies/biggrin.gif

[Maegaladiel]

Why thank you! I like it too.

And Meela, I should have known it was you! Thanks to your crazy antics, half of Gondor is on fire, and Faramir has put himself up for adoption!

Hmm. In the midst of all that confusion, now would be a very good time to start with the world domination plans in Gondor... Heh heh heh!