moisturize their leathery soles, put dreds in their foot hair, and stir it up with bob when he was smoking lembas. when he was not, they made balloon animals out of spam.

what were the dwarves trying to find when they dug Moria?

They were trying to build Middle-earth's first underground railway.

Which mountain is "The Cruel"?

Amon Sul.



What did Galadriel give Gimli?

duh! She gave him her favorite teddy bear! Such a heartfelt gift! And Gimli decided to name the bear Goldilocks, for reasons unknown.


How does Galadriel style her hair in the morning?

a comb and hair gel (which is acually troll snot)
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why was lembas made of poop?

Oh, thanks NN10, you've just reminded me why I spend as little time as possible with 14-year-old boys [img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img]

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What is Gollum's favorite color and why?

yellow because it remides him of the sun which he loves
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why did sam follow frodo so faithfuly? ((Oh dear I'm afraid to hear the answer to this one))

Because Frodo had enough evidence to put him away for twenty years. It was to be released to the Shirrifs in the event of Frodo's death.

What is Ted Sandyman's occupation?

Don't tell anyone, but he's actually an undercover Elf, keeping both eyes on those foolish hobbits and keeping them in the dark, so the Elves can use them for power. (Sorry, guys. Just watched the Matrix for the fourth time.)

How did Saruman make the Uruk-hai?

He bought a "Build Your own Hybrid" kit from his local craft shop.

What are the gardens of the Entwives called in the Third Age?

Home and Garden Enterprises.

What is served at FarmerMaggott's table?

Silly question - maggots, of course!

How did Bilbo rescue the Dwarves from the dungeons of Mirkwood?

No, really, it was dead meat. *grins*

He got them off on a technicality, after hiring Johnny Cochra-dill-io, the best lawyer in the Four Farthings.

"If the halbrek doesn't fit, you must acquit!"

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Why did Theoden not want to go to war with Saruman?

Theoden did not want to be a 'Saur' loser.

Why did the White Council heed Curunir?

[ October 15, 2002: Message edited by: Bethberry ]

Because he had an honest face.

For how long did Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli pursue the Uruk Hai?

[ October 15, 2002: Message edited by: Squatter of Amon Rudh ]

101 days.it started as a nature walk North, but they got sidetracked because Gimli wanted to stop and pick some buttercups. Legolas threw a hissyfit because he broke a nail, and Aragorn had to act as a ref in the middle earth rugby championship that was played in Fangorn forest. it turned out that Merry and Pippin were playing in the game, so they were all reunited in the refreshment tent.
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Why were Tom's boots yellow?

he couldn't make it to the bathroom.
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why did gimli make a voodoo doll of legolas out of his hair?

He didn't. He claimed to have done so to force Legolas to stand and fight at Helm's Deep (Legolas is a terrible physical coward).

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What service did Eorl the Young perform for Gondor?

He actually did nothing at all, he was too damn lazy.
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If Arwen didn't marry Aragorn, who would be the lucky man?

I assume you mean the lucky man who got to marry Aragorn, so I would say Legolas!!!!!


Why did Saruman want the Ring?

To revive his flagging second-hand jewellery business.

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How did Gandalf escape from Orthanc?

He built a hang-glider and jumped off of the edge.

What were the names of the Three Rings of the Elves?

Larry, Curly, and Moe [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]


Can Elrond dance?

duh he can dance!! he does a mean Macarena with Legolas, and he is currently working on his YMCA routine to do at the Rivendell talent show.
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why does Sam breathe so loud?

He's gonna be DarthVadar for Halloween and wants to make sure he's got the breathing part down pat.

Question: Why did Beorn REALLY follow Thorin&Co. after leaving his house?

Because he'd forgotten to recommend to them his local Chinese restaurant, and he'd promised the owner as a personal favour.

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Who sold Saruman most of his pipeweed supply?

Pippin, of course!! he's got connections in the black market.
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Why did the Ents storm Isengard?

Because Saruman knew several secrets about the ents and was going to tell all of Middle-Earth.
..::Why/how did Frodo get injured at Weathertop?::..

a few too many pints, pipeweed, the finest ladies of bree, it's a recipe for disaster
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what kind of faceplate did legolas have on his cell phone?

Shiny and reflective, to check himself out.
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There were really 11 ringwraiths, what happened to the other two?

They were too lazy to leave Mordor/Angmar (where do the ringraiths live in their spare time, anyway?), so they let the other nine go without them.
..::How did Gandalf find out that Frodo had the one ring?::..

He read it in the gossip column of the Hobbiton Gazette.

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What is a mathom?

It's a pet name that Hobbits call things that they love a lot; for instance, if Frodo had kept the Ring for much longer, he probably would have called it his 'mathom', like Gollum called it his 'precioussssssssssssssssssssss'.

Who was the original Dark Lord of ME?

Groucho Marx

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What was Helm's nickname?

Helm Hammerhead [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

What became of the three elven rings after the one ring was destroyed?

Vilya turned bright purple and began to make butterflies appear at random;
Narya metamorphosed into a Monopoly house and Nenya started to make irritating noises.

The custodians of the Three donated them to a charity jumble sale by common consent.

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Where is the Hall of Fire?

Go out your front door, turn right, go straight for about 500 miles, then turn around 10 times quickly, and then dig a hole 1 mile straight down. It's right there! (Or it was the last time I checked. It moves sometimes.)

What was Gollum before he found the Ring?

A chartered accountant.
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Who were the Wainriders?

They were a group of nomadic insurace salesmen.


Why doesn't Gandalf want people to know he has a elven ring?