Frodo stares in horror at the huge spider on Gandalf's back.

Frodo: Why are you wincing?

Gandalf: I just can`t bear to look when I am clipping my toenails.

Gandalf had a severe identity crisis. Why had a balrog just called him "my son" and why did Frodo keep slinging tiny pieces of metal at him and referring to him as Magneto?

Gandalf stole Frodo's pipe... Gandalf must pay!

Frodo suddenly realizes that Gandalf isn't watching his staff. :eek: Oh, the Possiblities...!

OR

Gandalf had his head surgically reattached on top of his left shoulder.

OR

"Yes, Frodo, I did bring my chair along."

OR

Frodo has no idea what's going on.

Frodo is shocked when he thinks to himself "I've never realized how big Gandalf's nose really is"

Frodo stares in dismay as Gandalf's mind starts to atrophy....

Frodo found his lost Tarantula, but doesn't have the heart to tell Gandalf

When Gandalf went misty eyed recounting his memories of young Primula Brandybuck, Frodo had an awful premonition that he was about to find out who his real father was.....

Gandalf may have been pleased to break the Middle-earth record for longest fingernail, but it was beginning to disturb Frodo.

Expounding upon Hookbill's brilliance...
 

"Here I am, brain the size of a planet, and they ask me to lead an expidition through the Mines. Call that job satisfaction? 'Cause I don't."

a former life
 

Gandalf: "Yes, that's right Frodo, I used to be an animal judge. Oh, they just settle disputes and the like between animals...I was assigned to the dog division. *Sigh* I eventually quit though; I just couldn't take all the he-shed she-shed."

Frodo stares in horror as Gandalf talks to his hair.

Gandalf: My pipe? Oh, sure...here you go.

Frodo stands in horror...

Gandalf: IS there something you can do about this giant wart on my back Gimli? Honestly it feels like I'm carrying a 500 lb Gorilla.

Estel, the storm you have unleashed...
 

Gandy: "My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrate.

Once I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.

After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it. The job was only so-so anyhow.

Next I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was exhausting.

I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn't cut it.

I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.

My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't note worthy.

I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.

Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried, but I just didn't fit in.

I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.

I thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell.

I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.

My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit, because it was always the same old grind.

After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian, until I realized there was no future in it."

Fro: *gape*

Gandalf: Well, tell a lie, my first job was selling doors, door-to-door. Hard job;
*Ding-dong* Hello would you like a - oh you already have one.

Frodo stares in horror when he realises they have got the scaling wrong again and that if Gandalf stood up he would barely reach his knee.......

Terrified, Frodo hopes to sneak away before Gandalf can start another one of his "Back in my day..." stories.

wow Oddwen, that's just...wow
 

Frodo stares and Gandalf slowly shakes his head as Oddwen rattles off pun after pun...
Gandalf: "That's pathetic. Simply pathetic..."

Frodo became disturbed as Gandalf talked in chilling detail how he wanted to killed Denethor.

gandalf tells the tale of how he killed Bizarro-Gandalf in Bizarro world...(Or should it be Wrongo-Gandalf in Wrongo world?)

A Picture from the Pipe.
 

Gandalf daydreams while Frodo looks in horror at the new picture....

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...mba/Merry2.jpg

As Merry sinks deeper into the quick-cushion, he wonders where it all went wrong.

Merry is blissfully unaware of the sword that is slowly making it's way round behind him.

While relaxing in Rivendell, Merry is mistaken by an elf for an unusually life-like pin cushion.

Once Merry takes sufficient time to notice he can't help but notice how dashing Legolas is with his long flowing hair.

Merry decides he's never even seen a giant multicolored Venus’s-fly-trap, much less been slowly devoured by one.

Intervention!!!
 

Pippin is making sure that Legolas can't find a sword...to oggle at his reflection!!

Merry: Starlight, star bright, first star I see tonight. Wish I may, wish I might, have the wish I wish tonight. Ooo, I wish my eyes were as big as Frodo's.

Disimbodied voice: Who are you?

Merry: Brandybuck, Meriadoc Brandybuck.

Voice: Well Mr. Brandybuck, you won't escape this time, that incredibly comfortable pillow will render you useless until that laser behind you slices you into carp food. Mwahahahahaaa

Merry: What? I thought that was a sun beam!

Merry could barely take the suspense while watching my Spurs come down to the wire in Game 7 of the NBA Finals! :eek:

not again....
 

Merry stares in shock at Gandalf the Grey....uncloaked!

Merry: "You know... that is a really big pumpkin."

Merry watches on as The Saucepan Man continuously beats people over the head with his pans.

OR

Merry: Come on Gandalf! Which hand is the coin in? Which one?

Merry stops by the Lorien Mall for a picture...


~Ka

the trials of the island
 

Merry contemplates which villager is the werewolf...
"He could be, but so could she. Oh, I don't know! And there's only two minutes left to vote too!!!" :eek:

Merry realises that the strange light of Lothlorian means he can see right through the elf girls' flimsy dresses....

Merry

Midnight not a sound from the palace, has the Lady Galadriel, decided to help?
In the firelight the withered leaves collect at my feet and the wind begins to mourn

Memory all alone in the moonlight
I can smile at the old days, I was comfortable then
I remember a time I drink all the ale I wanted
Let the memory live again

Every tall shadow seems to be a Nazgul
Someone mutters and the streetlamp gutters and soon it will be morning

Daylight, I must wait for the sunrise
I must think of a new life, and I musn't give in
When the dawn comes tonight will be a memory too, and a new day will begin

Burnt out ends of smoky days
A stale cold smell of morning
A wizard dies, another night is over, another day is dawning

Touch me, it's so easy to leave me, all alone with my memory of my days in the sun
If you touch me you'll understand what happiness is, look a new day, has begun

* With apologies to Andrew Lloyd Weber and T.S. Eliot

Now that you've said it...
 

Or Merry contemplates which villager would be best for midnight snack. :eek:

Merry is inconsolable by the news that his favourite villager was just killed.

Or (stealing Kath's idea) Merry is completely unaware that the ferocious Umbrella of Doom is sneaking up behind him.

must--resist--can't--resist...
 

Merry: "Do the chickens have large talons?"

OR

Merry: "But my lips hurt real bad!"