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-   -   Qs and As for TLOTR but I only want WRONG answers (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/showthread.php?t=4101)

Eruhen 11-01-2002 10:13 AM

He was the sixth Istar. He came to ME in the shape of a hobbit, not a Man, kind of incognito so Sauron wouldn't suspect anything. He was the one who convinced Frodo to destroy the Ring. Gandalf got jealous and contrived an 'accident' so that he could get all the credit.

What was Isildur's Bane?

Diamond18 11-01-2002 10:56 AM

Actually, the correct term is "Isildur's bangs". His hair was always getting into his eyes and driving him crazy, and since he was so famous, any bad hair-do was called "Isildur's Bangs". Over the years the term wore down to "Isildur's Bane" and the original meaning was lost.

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What famous book did Pippin write after returning from the War of the Ring?

Gandalf_theGrey 11-01-2002 11:31 AM

Peregrin Took wrote the bestselling

"Wherever You Go in Middle Earth, Adventure is Just a Stone's Throw Away."

This book renders an account of such ignominious events as tossing stones down Moria's well, the borrowing of a palantír, and how Pippin dealt with finding himself between a rock and a hard place throughout it all.

??????????????????????????????????????????

Name as many different flights of stairs as you can, and their significance.

Gandalf the Grey

Birdland 11-01-2002 12:51 PM

Well, there's "Up the Down Staircase", which made a star of Sandy Dennis and made buck teeth sexy. Then there's "Stairway to Heaven", the favorite song of DJ's needing a bathroom break. Of course, who can forget Dorothy McQuire in "The Spiral Staircase"! Oooooh boy! Was that a scary movie! Remember that part where she's going up the stairs...

Huh? Oh! You mean, like, stairs in the book! Eh, who cares?

Anyway, so Dorothy McQuire is climbing up these stairs, see, when suddenly...

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When Frodo returned to the Shire, why did he say "It feels like going asleep again."?

[ November 01, 2002: Message edited by: Birdland ]

Diamond18 11-01-2002 04:00 PM

Because the Shire is well known for it's magical poppy fields.

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How did Wormtounge get his nickname?

Beren87 11-01-2002 04:02 PM

An episode of Fear-Factor, it was on last season.

Where did Iluvatar dwell?

Aylwen Dreamsong 11-01-2002 04:24 PM

Don't tell anyone, but he signed up for survivor and is in Taiwan. I hope he wins a million dollars!


Who was Frodo's secret girlfriend?

Aragost 11-01-2002 05:11 PM

Lobelia Sackville Baggins, that's how she got Bag End so easily.


Who was the mother of Thorondir?

gralin musicteeth 11-01-2002 08:12 PM

Big Mama Throwrug
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
how many dwarfs went to the lonely mountain?

Nevfeniel 11-01-2002 09:10 PM

17.5 (don't ask).
..::What were the fellowship members' favorite books and why?::..

Diamond18 11-01-2002 10:54 PM

Frodo: "Weightlifting Made Easy."
Sam: "Gardening and Warfare, a Guide."
Pippin: "The Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire" [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
Merry: "Tuesday's With Merry."
Legolas: "The Old Man and the Sea."
Aragorn: "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People."
Boromir: "The Art of Self-Control."
Gimli: "Elves and How to Understand Them."
Gandalf: "The Way of the Wizard" or "Simple Spells for Hearth and Home."

As to why, I think it's self-explanitory...
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What would Gimli see if he looked into Galadriel's Mirror?

[ November 01, 2002: Message edited by: Diamond18 ]

Marileangorifurnimaluim 11-02-2002 11:07 PM

Nothing.

She broke it in a fit of rage years ago, causing the elves' current rather long run of bad luck.

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

What did Pippin steal?

[ November 03, 2002: Message edited by: Marileangorifurnimaluim ]

hobbitlass 11-03-2002 09:04 AM

Galadriel's pasties and high heels.

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For whom did Pippin steal these items for?

Raefindel 11-03-2002 01:31 PM

For himself, of course. He planned to sell them on E-bay and open an espresso stand with the profits.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What was Galadriel's favorite beverage?

Diamond18 11-03-2002 03:24 PM

A dozen raw eggs, cracked into a glass in the wee hours of the morning.

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What diguise did Sam and Frodo use to cross Gorgoroth?

Birdland 11-03-2002 04:14 PM

Oooooh, it was good one. They carved a big eye into a pumpkin, then Frodo stood on Sam's shoulders, and they wrapped a long, black cloak around themselves. Everyone thought it was the ol' Dark Lord Himself wandering his realm.

That is, til the pumpkin fell off...then Gollum was onto them!

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What song did Sam sing to the Fellowship when they were camped at the Troll Dell? (You can give us a few verses, as well.)

Diamond18 11-03-2002 04:20 PM

The leaves were long, the grass was green,
A loon is he that will not sing:
O! Water Hot is a noble thing!
Tinúviel was dancing there,
To music of a pipe unseen,
But better than rain or rippling streams
Is Water Hot that smokes and steams.

Up came Beren with his big boots on,
Said he to Tinúviel: “Pray what is yon?
For it looks like the shin o’ mine nuncle Tim,
As should be lying in a graveyard!

One moment stood she, and a spell
His voice laid on her: Beren came,
And doom fell on Tinúviel.

“My lad,” she said, “this bone I stole.
But what be bones that lie in a hole?
Thy nuncle was dead as a lump ‘o lead,
Afore I found his shinbone.”

Then through woven woods in Elvenhome
She lightly fled on dancing feet.
O! Water is fair that leaps on high
In a fountain white beneath the sky;
But never did fountain sound so sweet
As splashing Hot Water with my feet!

Again she fled, but swift he came,
And called her by her elvish name.
Beren’s leg is game, since home he came,
And his bootless foot is lasting lame;
But Tinúviel don’t care, and she’s still there
With the bone she boned from its owner.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

How did Gollum refer to himself?

Birdland 11-03-2002 04:42 PM

Smeagol...The Smeagter... The Smeaginator...Smeag-Meister...

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What was the waterfall in Ithilien called?

[ November 03, 2002: Message edited by: Birdland ]

Nevfeniel 11-03-2002 06:47 PM

The very first name it aquired was "Hey-that-cave-behind-that-waterfall-looks-like-a-good-spot". It has been shortened to "That-waterfall-thing". [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
..::Getting into the Silmarillion, why did Nienor kill herself?::..

Marileangorifurnimaluim 11-03-2002 07:44 PM

She was forced to watch an animated screen adaptation of 'The Silmarillion' by Ralph Bakshi.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What was Lobelia Sackville-Baggins' primary weapon, and where did she use it?

[ November 03, 2002: Message edited by: Marileangorifurnimaluim ]

Elven Mistress 11-03-2002 09:10 PM

Pots and pans and she used them in her kitchen...

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What is Pippin's favourite song?

Nevfeniel 11-04-2002 10:47 PM

Twinkle twinkle, little star, of course. You didn't know that? [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
..::What big mistake did Bilbo make while talking to Smaug?::..

Marileangorifurnimaluim 11-05-2002 12:43 AM

Not brushing his teeth first. Dragons have a very sensitive sense of smell. Fortunately for Bilbo he didn't smell like something Smaug wanted to eat, not after weeks of cram.

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Why did Sauron want that ring anyways?

Birdland 11-05-2002 02:08 AM

Actually, he didn't want the Ring so much as the finger that was in the Ring. He really missed that finger, you know. It was just long enough to reach that "itchy spot" between his shoulder blades. Not to mention that people had a tendency to stare when they noticed he only had nine digits.

So he kept searching, searching, searching for the One Finger that Isildur had removed, never realizing that he had disgarded the appendage long ago and kept the Ring! Foolish mortal.

For a brief moment Sauron had hoped that he could take Frodo's finger, it being better than nothing, but it was much too small, and burnt to a crisp, to boot.

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From The Hobbit - Why did Beorn use ponies as his house servants?

[ November 05, 2002: Message edited by: Birdland ]

Raefindel 11-05-2002 12:40 PM

Well, the dogs kept licking the dishes instead of washing them. They really didn't work out and he had to let them go.
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Which dwarf loaned Bilbo a hood and why did he feel he needed it?

Gandalf_theGrey 11-05-2002 01:02 PM

Horace Hoodwinker loaned Bilbo a hood, because it was better than wearing a Baggins over his head.

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Why do Dwarves get along better with Hobbits than with Elves?

[ November 05, 2002: Message edited by: Gandalf_theGrey ]

Atariel 11-05-2002 01:32 PM

because dwarves are all ugly, and hobbits, though totally adorable, are uglier than elves

why does Tom Bopmbadil only speak in rhymes?

mark12_30 11-05-2002 01:36 PM

Because his automatic prose generator crashed a long time ago, and he has to have Agent Elrond reload it into his programming, but he doesn't want to admit that he needs reprogramming.

Why does Gandalf do fireworks?

Elenna 11-05-2002 02:34 PM

Because he's a pyromaniac, and fireworks are his therapist's suggestion for a positive way to burn things.

------------------------------

How did Gollum get to know Shelob?

The Squatter of Amon Rűdh 11-05-2002 03:10 PM

Well, Gollum had been pretty lonely living down in the caves beneath the mountains. In the end, just for a laugh, you understand, he called one of those telephone chat lines and ran into a "sensual older woman". Needless to say their only ever dinner engagement was something of a failure, but they remained friends; meeting every so often for a bottle of Mirkwood red and a takeaway Orc.

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Who is this Elendil person anyway?

mark12_30 11-05-2002 03:18 PM

Person? It's a recipe for broiled fish in cream sauce; the name is short for "Elegant with Dill".

If the shards of Narsil were good enough to whack off Sauron's finger, why reforge it?

Elven Mistress 11-05-2002 05:41 PM

They never really reforged it, you see. They just said they did and didn't...just to get us all confused...

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Who was the real 'Fool' of the Fellowship?

Diamond18 11-05-2002 06:19 PM

Legolas was the biggest Fool. I mean, even Pippin could have kept Gollum captive! And then, to join up with a bunch of mortals on a quest to save a world he's going to be leaving in a couple hundred years anyway...!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

How did Saruman die?

Dagmar of Avalon 11-05-2002 07:14 PM

Saruman got pushed into a river in Hobbiton and drowned. He couldn't float anymore because he wasn't an Istari.


__________________________________________


Why doesn't Frodo wear sunglasses?

mark12_30 11-05-2002 08:28 PM

Because he doesn't need them to be cool, dude. Just like the Balrog is already--- (swoooon-- ooooooo, he's sooooo---) HOT.

(drumroll) Why... does... the... balrog... have...
(HAH!!I'm not going to ask about WINGS!)

....curly ram's horns?

Nevfeniel 11-05-2002 08:37 PM

Because in his spare time, the Balrog and some brave orcs like to have something like a bull-fight, except they used the balrog as a bull, instead.
..::Why doesn't Treebeard like to be hasty?::..

mark12_30 11-05-2002 08:40 PM

Because no matter how much coffee he drinks it just doesn't wake him up in the morning.

Why is Galadriel blond?

Aylwen Dreamsong 11-05-2002 09:03 PM

The local cvs ran out of all hair dyes except for the color: "High-Elf-Lady-Of-Lothlorien-Blond"


Why are men from Gondor so stinky?

Diamond18 11-05-2002 10:11 PM

Because men from Gondor are like onions: they stink, sprout little white hairs, and have layers.

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Who were Legolas's siblings? Please give names and some information about their personalities and lives.....
(I know I ask too much, but is it really too much to ask too much?)

hobbitlass 11-06-2002 01:59 PM

First there is Lincolnloglad. He's the eldest. Kind of a gruff, doesn't want the family business of running a kingdom. He's into logging Mirkwood forest. A very good trade with the dwarves and men, especially since both populations are rebuilding.

Then there's lil' brother, Brioboy. He's quiet and thoughtful and very resourceful. He has plans to make the West more accessable by laying logs (from big brother) in long lines parrallel to each other. On these will ride many wains tied together to transport goods and people.
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What flavor was Bilbo's cake and what did it say on it?

[ November 06, 2002: Message edited by: hobbitlass ]


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