Eomer: "You! Were you in charge of navigation!"
Soldier: "Yu-y-yes, sss-sir. I u-used M-MapQuest."
Eomer: "Blast! I should have known. Ohh! I hate MapQuest!"

OR

Eomer: "I can sing higher, higher than you..."

OR

Eomer doesn't see the man coming up to stab him in the back.

OR

Soldier: "Sir, the battle is that way!"
Eomer(clearly not knowing): "I know that! I was just making sure you were paying attention!"

The hard way to do it.
 

The old whoopie-cushion-on-the-day-of-battle trick didn't seem to be recieved well by Eomer.

Eomer: I want a new picture up and I want it now!
Guy holding Horse: Sir, we got one.
Eomer: WELL, where is it!


http://www.warofthering.net/quintess...thannun_tn.jpg

Madril: So, you got the Ransom letter done Captain.

Faramir: Yes, it says...Dear Sauron, I have your ring. If you want it, you must withdraw your troops from Osgiliath, and tell Denethor I did it.

Madril: Sounds good sir, but what's with the P.S. Oh, and give me some fluffy bunnies.

Eomer:
"Everyone needs to calm down. *girlish squeals* THIS IS NO TIME TO PANICK!"

Faramir:
"I didn't know we could still get Atlantic Salmon on the Anduin. Nice of them to send some though."

Faramir and the Flatpack Furniture.

Faramir: "Clearly they put in two Piece Gs and didn't put a Piece F in the box. And there are three screws missing."

Eowyn (shouting from the kitchen) : "Next time read the instructions before you try to put the shelves together. Tch."

Faramir and his men puzzle over the strange uncloaking patterns that Gandalf uses.

Faramir: We'll get him one day!

Madril: "Well, that's my two cents' worth anyway."

Faramir: "I see you haven't been nipped yet by Rimbaud's Phantom Finance Foible-metre."

Faramir: "According to the map we should have taken the first turning on the right a mile back. That's where the short cut is."

Madril: "No, it was second on the right. I'm sure. If we keep on this way it will cut five minutes off the journey time."

Faramir: "No cause then we'll get to those awful traffic lights coming out of the Morgul Vale. Always loads of traffic there."

Madril: "I'm right. If we go your way then there are roadworks, and that one-way system."

Faramir: "I'll get Eowyn, she's a woman, she'll know how to use the road atlas."

David Wenham: According to this map the hidden script is hiddden here *points*

Other actor: And you think by showing PJ this, he'll make your character a good guy.


or


Faramir: So all we need to do is travel 10 leagues north turn west for one league then we shall find the treasure.

Madril: What treasure is that my lord?

Faramir: Why the map that will show us the way to the ring of power.

Madril: Ummm my lord you just let the hobbit go who had that very ring.


or

(for gurthang)

Faramir is working with Mapquest of Middle-earth

Madril: So, you think that if we set fire to these maps so that we never find our way to Osgiliath your father will let you off the hook?

Faramir: Of course!

Madril (muttering): Idiot.

Mardil: The rose petals are set and my men have lit all the candles.

Faramir: Good, now get out before Eowyn gets home!

Faramir: See, Grima is here, in Orthanc. We're here, in Ithilien. It will take him a long time before he finds us.
Maldir: Umm, sir?
Faramir: Yes Maldir?
Maldir: YOU'RE IT!!!! GOT YOU!! YOU SUCK!!!
Faramir: I knew one of those Hobbits was it!!

OR

Faramir: I KNEW we should have taken that left turn at Alberquerque (sp?)

Faramir: And here is conclusive proof as to why I am a much better guy than Boromir.

Maldir: Sir, that's a pencil drawing of you kicking Boromir in the butt. What's that signature? 'By Faramir. Age 7.' Sir, this isn't conclusive proof!

Faramir: Well you have horrible teeth and your mum smells! *runs off screaming like a young girl*

Maldir: Oh dear.

Faramir & Maldir: "If we build this large wooden badger..."

Faramir: "Yes, Madril, the candlelight might be very romantic but I would be much happier if you had paid this here electricity bill on time."

Faramir: 'All right - who's nicked me chips?'

Faramir: Who stole my pen?
Maldir: I think it was Joe.
Faramir:Joe, who's Joe?
Maldir: Joe Mama. hahaha.
Faramir: Oh brother. :rolleyes:
Maldir: I can't believe you fell for that again.

Madril: "We must look to our own borders. Orcs are on the move. Sauron is marshalling an army. Easterlings & Southrons are passing through the Black Gate."

Faramir: "Madril kindly stop picking your nose when your talking to me."

I was thinking the same thing only...

Faramir: We're lost. It says we're right here, but we're not.

Madril: Don't you just hate mapquest?

And actually I do hate mapquest, I recently had a bad experience with it.

Wizard's Pupil
 

Madril: So you got your report card? Have you shown it to your father yet?

Faramir: NO! I mean, no.

Madril: But you got an "A+" from Mithrandir.

Faramir: Precisely. Help me burn it.

Maldir: Of all the places in Middle Earth, you had to pick THIS dark creepy place to hide from Grima!!
Faramir: What!? I liked the waterfall!!!

Grima Pic
Grima: Ring goes on...Ring goes off...

Eomer Pic
(from the Ham thing first mentioned by dancing spawn)
Eomer: I brough you your sandwich, but I'm too late!!!

Faramir Pic
David Wenham: This is my script and I am going to be the hero and Aragorn will give the throne to me.

When Gondorians get the TV Guide.

Faramir: "Oh look, there's a really interesting documentary on at 8 tonight about the decline of the tree-frog in the woods of Lothlorien."

Madril: "Sorry, but that clashes with Coronation Street. I have to find out what happens to Gail when she goes to trial for stealing from Ena Sharples."

Madril: So, me and the boys, well, we had a bit of a whip round and we bought you this "Sorry your father hates you and is sending you to a certain death" Card.

Farmir: They actually sell these?

Faramir gets his hands on the hairdresser's catalogue
 

Faramir: So, you see, I want a tiny braid like this, and a few nonchalant, dirty curls like over there... *pauses* you think I should go chocolate brown?

Eowyn (from just off the picture): And you tell me to get over my 'Aragorn obsession'!


--- or:


Faramir: NOOO! Look at the plan! The candles were supposed to be on the other side. And you promised to move that one barrel to my friendship corner. This shall disturb my love-feng shui!

Faramir and his men decide to brighten up Henneth Annun
 

Faramir: Hmm, I quite like the Pale Mango, but perhaps a more subtle shade like the Apricot White would suit the place better.

Madril: What about the Lime Green, sire?

Faramir:Ok....I will attack South mirkwood from east mirkwood

unbeknowst to the rest of the men Maldir and faramir have been stuck in a dashing game of risk for 3 years

An Ode to Denethor
 

Faramir: "Okay, lets see what we have so far...

I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface
I don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes

Every step that I take is another mistake to you
And every second I waste is more than I can take...

You think it's any good?"

Madril: "It sounds like an awesome song to me."

Faramir has too much of his dream...
 

Madril: So sir, is our attack on the eastern walls ready yet?

Faramir: Eh... I don't know, if we paint the walls purple they will tarnish the glow of the green, and if we carpet the floors in blue, it will hurt our eyes... Unless, we only put half-windows in at every half corner and encrust some tortoises in gems to balance out the basic wall colours, then we have to figure out what type of gems...

Madril: ...Sir, do you remember what we were actually talking about?

Faramir: Not a clue, but I think I might have enough style to start my own interior design show, better than that Oliver guy from Changing Rooms!

~ Aesthete

Faramir has been living in his mother's old basement for too long.

Faramir: How could my attack miss?! I'm a level 32 Wizard, and I have 45 points in Concentration! And you aren't even that strong!
Madril: Yes, sir...but my Paladin has the Amulet of Undreth, and it allows him to cast Arcane Magic Failure.

Faramir: "Check it out Madril, gullible's not in the dictionary!" *muffled giggles*

Faramir: "Now you take the left sleeve & bring it over to the right side, and you take the right sleeve & wrap it around the shirt and back down...*sigh. I'll never get the hang of folding these darned ranger garments."

Madril: "Sire!"

Faramir: "Hang on..."

Madril: "SIRE! There are 100 Orcs right on the doorstep!"

Faramir: "Yeah, give me a minute...let me finish this Sudoku puzzle."

Faramir: What have we here?

Madril: A new picture, sir.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...a/196410_1.jpg

Pipin began to worry when Denathor began talking to his wine glass.

OR

Denathor: Come, sing me a song.

Pippin: Err... hmm... err... Happy Birthday to you...

Pippin thinking to himself: *sigh* Aren't Denethor's gray curly locks so dreamy. I wish I could get my hair to look like that.

Denethor: What do you think me a dotard that I cannot read your thoughts. I grow weary of your obsessing over my hair. If you continue I will send you to retake Osgilliath too.

Denethor tries desperately (yet to no avail) to move the Wine glass with his mind.

At the same time, Pippin tries desperately (yet to no avail) to move the Wine glass with his mind.

Wine glass: Hello Denethor.
Denny: How do you know my name!?! :eek: