"See, Donald Trump, this is the way real men handle a receding hairline."

Agent Elrond takes out glitches in Middle-Matrix.

OR

Elrond: "Ooh! Is that a pink-chested warbler? That's another one for Exotic Bird Bingo! I am really lovin' this."

OR

Pointing Orc: "Hey! Check out this guy: He's got pointy Ears! HAHAHA!"
Elrond: :mad:

OR

Elrond smiles with pleasure at yet another perfectly cut cake.

Elrond realises he just stuck his sword in his foot.

Elrond: You see, Gilgallad, your foot looks much better with a sword though it.

OR

Elrond, battle feild surgen.

Even during battle, elves didn't forget the essentials of civility and protection, take Elrond's stunning purple cape for example. Any fashion forward orc wouldn't dream of harming such a garment.

Yes, its ture... Elrond was the Mouth of Sauron's dentist! :eek:

Elrond: Just open wide! :D

Elrond: WHAT?! Deny me access to the Down's, take that, white #403!

(Very) bad horror movie
 

Severed arm: "FEAR MY WRATH!"

Elrond: "NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!


or (a proper caption):


Every girl at the disco went wild for Elrond's full battle-suit.

Elrond: you are defeated orc

Orc: no i'm not

Elrond: what! your arms off!

Orc: no its not

Elrond: whats that!

orc:...i've had worse

Elrond: you lie!

Inspired by Eomer...

Elrond only won the Disco competition by cutting the legs off the other competitors.

Elrond's yearbook...
 

Life was one big rave party in the golden Second Age.

or

"In the game of Werewolf... Sometimes, Guardians don't last the night."

Elrond finds a cure for his PMT
 

It is definitely Elrond - trust me I have been gawping at Hugo Weaving for over 20 years (everyone should have a hobby) ;)

After years of running a refuge for needy, grabby relatives and other wasters, Elrond found killing things really therapeutic....

The village had decided: ++ELROND :p

OR

Elrond took the next step in his somewhat bizarre lifelong quest to become a goldfish: he had scales attached.

Elrond killed the man who pointed out that he was wearing Arwen's purple shawl.

Elrond: It's not a shawl, it's a cloak!

Elrond: Dance, Orc! Dance!

Gilgalad: Elrond! He's paralysed!

Elrond: That doesn’t mean he cannot hear! Dance, Orc! Dance!

Elrond goes ape on the dancefloor when the DJ plays Dancing Queen.

Princess Bride
 

Elrond: "I see you have only two and a half fingers. Someone is looking for you."

Elrond: "Come not between Elrond and his prey!"

Elrond bought the Orc version of "The Little Book of Calm" and found to his surprise that it worked particularly well.

Elrond: Wow, I never realised how calming a good maiming is!
:D

Soldier: So...did you just kill Gil-Galad, steal his armor, take his weapon, and marry the women of his country?

Elrond: Eh, he had it commin

There was noone else around but Pippin hoped desperately that the huge grey wrinkly thing was not his blind date.........

Elvish paramedics
 

Elrond: get your sorry self up and into that ambulance! come on!

Gil-Galad: i don't think your "tough love" is working, lets go get the stretcher

Elrond was once a model, showing off the designer armor of Mirdain&Khazad.

Voice emanating from arm: It could be you!

Elrond: What could be me?

Voice: Er, I don't know. I've never been asked that before.

OR

Elrond: I'm sorry but I'm in the middle of a battle, I really don't have time to buy anything!

Elrond: "Ah. I see your swartz is as big as mine..."

it continues
 

Orc: theres something you need to know about us

Elrond: what?

Orc: I am your father's brothers' nephew's cousin's former room mate

Elrond: and what does that make us?

orc: Absolutly nothing

Elrond...okay

Elrond was mad because the orc was taller than he was. So he cut off the orcs legs. Now he's not so mad.

OR

Erlond: "Man, it's so hard to water these orc plants! They keep grabbing the hose!"

Pants.
 

Elrond: You can tell that my future daughter will marry a scruffy mortal, just by looking at my pants?

Elrond: A Horse! A Horse! My Kingdom, for a Horse!

Gillgallad: You're not a king.

Elrond: Shh! They don't know that!

<- Pretend it's a golf ball.
 

Elrond prepares to defend himself against the dreaded Glove Puppet of Doom ...

Elrond: You cannot kill me! I've just filmed the going to valinor scene from The Return of the King! So I’m invincible!

Agent Smith: "Ugh, somebody kill me! I didn't mean to take over the body of a purple-winged fairy!"

Elrond watches in astonishment as the orc arm slowly metamorphoses into a bird!

Elrond: That's for the new picture!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...omba/11537.jpg

Frodo was very shocked with that the Sac-vill-Bagginses had done to Bag-End.

OR

Frodo: Where IS that light coming from? Having said that, where is that music coming from?

Frodo realises his hair is stuck to the wall.

Frodo took one look around and said "Gollem! If you're going to play with the hot glue gun, i'm not going to let you use it!

Frodo: Note to self, next time clean the attic while it's still possible.

Frodo: Let's stop playing hide-and-seek, Sam!

or...

Frodo: I'm lost - I hate MapQuest!