Two for the price of one!
 

Legolas: Where is the train to Hogwarts?

Gimli: I think it's not here.

Legolas: STUPID MAPQUEST! :mad:

Memoirs of a Elven hairdresser...
 

Legolas face became disgruntled as a storm cloud was quickly approaching. The cold and warm air pressure systems would be creating even more humidity and the likeliness that his perm would make it through the night was utterly depressing. His entire day had been ruined...

~ Aesthete

Gimli tries to pull a prank on Legolas yet after months of traveling without a shower, his body smell gives him away

Legolas can only stare in amazement, as Treebeard starts break-dancing.

OR

Legolas: Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?

Gimli: What? Sweaty and sticky with screaming kids running around and throwing sand at each other?

Legolas invents Middle-Earths first Elven-Bow seat belt

A simple game that had kept the two amused since Helm's Deep:

Legolas: You have to press a little harder or I can't feel it. Umm, is it... a house? A flower?

Gimli: A circle... :rolleyes:




edit: My 1000th post. :)

The Denethor pic...

Denethor: Doom, doom! My son is dead, we will burn, we will all burn! *pauses* *stares at camera*
Well, look at that! There's a spot on the wall! What do I keep these servants for?!? SERVAAAAAAAAANTS!!! TO ME WITH A DUSTRAG!

The Legimli pic...

Gimli grew increasingly agitated, as repeatedly during his monologues and closeups the elf dodged in front of him to pose.

Or...

L: Gimli, do you hear that?
G: What?
L: Nothing.
G: Fine, then.
L: Do you hear Nothing?
G: I don't hear anything.
L: I can't hear anything either, just Nothing.
G: You hear nothing and nobody?
L: I can't hear Nobody, he's miles away by now. I only hear Nothing.
G: *mutters* Probably because that's what's in your head...
L: I heard that!

Legolas refuses to admit that he has no idea where he is.

OR

Gimli: Are we there yet?

Legolas: No.

Gimli: How about now?

Legolas: NO!

Gimli: Now?

Legolas: Yes.

Gimli: Really?

Legolas: No.

Thanks, THE Ka and Farael.
 

Gimli: What is it? What do you see?

Legolas: Shall I describe it to you . . . or shall I find you a booster saddle.

Gimli: :mad: Just tell me what you freakin' see!

Legolas: Krebs cycle.

Gimli: :eek:

. . . on second thought, I think I should just have gone with the 'booster saddle' joke. :rolleyes:

As Legolas is on his most important scouting mission ever, he gets distracted by the german couple having a picnic on his nose.

Panto season in Middle-Earth!!!
 

Legolas:I keep hearing this weird noise!! incidentlly wheres Gimli?
Rest of the fellowship(off screen):hes behind you!!!!
Legolas:Oh no he isn't!!
Rest of the fellowship: :rolleyes:

Gimli:so wait a minute Galadrial is already married?
Legolas:yes already
Gimli:but she gave me some hair
Legolas:What she gave you was hair brush which happened to still have hair in it.

Good Evening. Now its time for the News at Ten.
 

Legolas: Look, it’s the NEW picture!

http://img-nex.theonering.net/images/scrapbook/5137.jpg

Wormtoung: Did you fill my bed with termites?

Eowyn: Erm... No?

OR

Wormy: Do you know there is a head in your bed?

Eowyn, the King said you have to make your bed and I am not leaving here until you do

Wormtongue: It's no good sulking, you're not having this room, it's mine now.

Grima: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck, could chuck wood? Answer the question!

or

Grima: We can do this the easy way or the hard way. Now, just answer my question, did you steal my "Best of Michael Jackson" CD?

or

Eowyn knows the Corleone family is after her when she finds a horse head in her bed.

Grima became furious when he discoverd that Eowyn was wearing his favourit dress.

Eowyn: For the last time Grima, I do not want a wax model of you to remember you always by. Now get that thing out of my bed!

Grima: Ahhhh come on...we can have those girl talks. I'm sensitive I promise.

or

Grima: Okay give me the treasure map and you won't get hurt.

Grima is very confused when he spots a Dixie cup on the wardrobe. Eowyn pretends not to see it, as to speak an Anakronism will get her sent to Mordor.

When the cabinets were full, Eowyn began hiding the rest of the dead bodies under her bed. No one would ever notice...

Grima: Did your bed get... taller somehow?

Eowyn: *well, now I have to kill him too...*

It was a never-ending cycle.

Grima: Is that a wig?

OR

Eowyn really DID have eyes in the back of her head! :eek:

You know when you get back to their place, and the room's a tip? Puts you right off.

The latest Tracy Emin art show comes to Meduseld.

Grima: "You see, I just love the dichotomy that this suggests. Taken in the everyday context it would be little more than a mess, but placed in the Art Gallery it suggests something tragic, almost biblical."

Eowyn: "No, I still don't get it."

Grima: Give it up Eowyn, you're just not angst teenage attitude enough to cry in your bed all day while listening to Here I am in darkness of my darkness which is very dark, gah... Sssss! by Orc Wasteland...


~ Aesthete

Grima: Look what you've done!! You've gotten us all the way to Rohan! How in Eru's name did you manage that!?

Eowyn: Simple! I used MapQuest!!

or

If Grima had known that Eowyn was a Wolf, maybe he wouldn't have asked her if her bed had gotten taller. (Play off of Maeggaladiel)

Can't resist . . .
 

Wormtongue: Who knows what you've spoken to the dark watches of the night, when the walls of your bower seem to close in about you; a hutch to trammel some wild thing in. How 'bout it, baby? Will you be my wild thing?

(Thanks, Oddie. This is hilarious! :D )

Gríma practices his lines on a manequin.

or

Gríma's Michael Jackson manequin needed some work.

When you are the prime suspect for a murder, there is one thing you shouldn't say...

Grima: Don't look in the bed!

OR

Grima: All right, I give up! Where's the money?

(playing off Rune)
Grima: Answer me, Eowyn. Why are you wearing your uncle's favorite dress?

OR

Grima: You ask me why I'm wearing black on Valentine's Day? What does this Faramir have that I don't, that's what I want to know.

OR

Eowyn: Grima, what's my Barbie doll doing there?

OR

The sheriffs accidentally killed the Seer. One of the sheriffs is actually the Cobbler and tries to make the other sheriff guilty of hunting the Seer.

OR

The Lovers are having a tiff.
Grima: I told you not to let my fellow wolf be lynched!

Okay, that's enough for now. :rolleyes:

Grima: I just wanted to make my clothes out of a bedsheet, like you have. Is that a crime?

Grima: Does he look blue to you?

The last two villagers enter the home of Theodred only to find him violently maimed by the final wolf and the wolf-to-villager ratio now even...

Grima (wolf): “Sucks for you babe. Sucks for you...”

Grima figured that if he stared at her long enough, she'd get uncomfortable. Then she'd HAVE to talk to him! <3

OR

Grima: So it's NOT her natural hair color!!

OR

When the piles of clothes came up to their knees, Eowyn knew that Grima had been skipping out on his laundry duties.

Grima: To get to the other side! Get it?

Eowyn: Um...No.

Grima: Well then how about this one?

Eowyn: Um...No.

Grima: Have you NO sense of humor?!?

Eowyn: Um...No.

Flatmates from Hell

Grima: "He's my best mate and he's been kicked out of his flat. You don't mind if he sleeps in your bed while you're out at Uni all day do you?"

Happy Valentine's Day!!!
 

Appropriate for the day...

Grima: "Oh come on, it's not a difficult question Eowyn! Will you or will you not be my valentine?"

Grima: your eyes are like the pits of Orthanc and i'm a sleeping Ent being thrown into it

I'm sorry for this corny pickup line, but I can't resist.

Grima: Do you work at Subway? Because you're hot, fresh and toasty! :D ( :rolleyes: )

Eowyn starts to wonder if Grima is a vampire.