Caption time...


This was the last time Elrond let Arwen do his hair.

OR

Arwen: Where’d my book go?

Elrond: And I paid all that money for your education?

Elrond: Arwen, aren't you a little old for Green Eggs and Ham?

Elrond: Is that blood on your hands?

Arwen: For the last time I did not do anything to Glorfindel!

Elrond tried to supress a smirk, he had tried to warn Arwen what would happen if she let Changing Rooms do a make over but would she listen..

With admirable sangfroid, Elrond maintains his composure as the man lurking in the curtains sticks his hand up his skirt....

A bad enough pun for a neg rep.
 

Arwen: Father is Varda unpopular and boring?

Elrond: Why do you ask?

Arwen: Well all the stars are 'Square'

:rolleyes:

Arwen: Oh pleeeaase...
Elrond: No Arwen, you may not do coloring in until your room is tidy. And look at all that crayon on your hands!

Or

While Arwen distracts Elrond with her coloring book, Elrohir quietly destroys that hideous grey dressing gown he refused to throw out.

Elrond: Aren't you a little too old to still want to be read bed-time stories?

OR...

Elrond: Wait a second...Intro to Gondorian Politics...this isn't your book. Has that blasted Ranger boy been back after I forbade you from seeing him?

Arwen: I swear ada, there has been no one hiding in this room, especially not behind the curtains.

Playing off of Morm -

Elrond: Dear, we really need to stop reading bed-time stories. You are old enough and I'm not sure that Aragorn will continue.

Arwen: Oh, he does....oops.

Elrond: AND HOW WOULD YOU KNOW THAT, YOUNG LADY?

Or...

Elrond: And that constellation is the big dipper.

Or...

Elrond: And that constellation is the big dipper. Hey, wait...computer! The holodeck is malfuncitoning again!

Or...

Elrond: In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some...EEEEEE! Someone's got a cold hand!

Or...

Elrond: So is this what you call...a book?

Or...

Look, behind the curtains! It's the return of Steve, the squid from 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea!!

Arwen: Father, why is that man holding flowers near your bottom?

Elrond: That meat you cooked last night was off, and I have a bad case of wind, that's why people call you Arwen Undomesticated.

Arwen: But of all things, Dad, a mullet?

Elrond: My dear Arwen, it is but a part mullet. The business in the front is receding.

Arwen: But Daaad!!

Elrond: If I've I told you once, I've told you a thousand times! You are NOT trying out for the role of Cyndi in Scary Movie 1 and I will NOT help you practice by being the murderer!!

or

Arwen: Dad? Was Legolas fixing up your hair again?

or even

Arwen: Dad? Was Legolas fixing up your hare again?

or even more

Elrond: You didn't hit a single note on cue OR on key! You're fired!

or again

Man 'holding' the flowers: Will you marry me?

Arwen: YES!!!

Elrond: NO! Wait...was that even a part of the script!?!? :eek:

Elrond uselessly attempts to get Arwen to sleep with a bed-time story, Aragorn comes home in 20 minutes (and he's wearing that special perfume), completely unaware that Aragorn, lurking behind the curtains, is going to ALL lengths to incapacitate him.

OR

Arwen: Father, why are you so grumpy looking all the time these days? Ever since that party with Galadriel in Third Age 1042, I mean, what happened?

Elrond: (groan) Lets just say the water from her mirror and a Vodka Cruiser don't mix, ooooohhhh (holds stomach)

OR

Elrond: That's it young lady, I told you to stay away from that Ranger, now take your punishment! A half-hour reading from the Poems of Ted Sandyman!!

Arwen: NOOOOO!

OR

Arwen: *sigh* I wish Aragorn was home, father's readings always make me so glassy-eyed... and that wall in the background, what was wrong with SHOWING the stars, instead of painting them on the wallpaper!

Elrond flips through a wallpaper sampler book...

Elrond: "What do you think, daughter: The flowers or the leaves?"

Arwen: "Frankly father, I don't care. Anything's better than this horrid blue with random white spots!" :eek:

Arwen is holding a sleeping bag as she tells her father: If you don't get this room re-decorated, then I am sleeping under the constelation of Menofmacoroni and Squarespagetti.

Elrond: This is utter dribble! Mindless blabber and silly statements that mean nothing. What is this rubbish?

Arwen: My diary.

OR

Elrond: Okay... Aha... Ummm... yes... of course...

Arwen: Father, I stopped talking five minuets ago...

Elrond: Hmmm... yes... Indeed...

Elrond is about to find out that the book he has just taken from Arwen and Aragorn is titled 1001 Ways to Give A Wedgie.

Elrond: This book is dull, boring and tedious, it has no imagination, lacks depth and has no credible storyline, what did you say the name of the author was?

Arwen: Germaine Greer.

Elrond: Ring of Aoom, Ring of Boom, Ring of Coom, Ring of Doom, Ring of...

Arwen: That was it! Go back!

Elrond:... Ring of Eoom, Ring of foom. Nope, not in here. I afraid Aragorn was lying to you. You'll have to go to Valinor now.

Or

Awen is shocked as her father discovers the hollowed out book...

Elrond: So, this is where you've been hiding the Bacon!

Arwen sits down as Elrond prepares to give his 'birds and bees' talk.

It was pointless trying to get Elrond to listen when he was reading the sport section of the Eriador Telegraph....

Hugo wonders whether he should take his cue from Nigel Hawthorne's Archdeacon Grantly in the Barchester Chronicles or from Alan Rickman's Obadiah Slope while Liv with resignation contemplates her Eleanor Harding-Bold role.

Elrond: "My goodness how fasinating! I never knew all this about history. Thank goodness for this book, what'd you say it was? The DaVinci Code? I'll have to tell my friends about this..."

Arwen: "Uh, Dad. It's fiction."

Once again, An Idiot's Guide to Parenting outside the Elvenhome failed for Elrond...

E: Well, at least you don't have six sisters and i'm silmaril crazy...

A: Yeah, and you think healing hobbits is Biography Channel worthy...

E: Young lady, if you don't (pauses to look in book) stop right now, I'll make you take an oath for an obviously doomed task!

~ Aesthete

http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g3...es_filming.jpg

Sam: Mr. Frodo, he calls himself The Ghost of Christmas Past.

or

Andy: See! Frodo's got it! This is the way you use a 'natural' toilet.

Frodo: Ummmm...Guys!?!?

or

Bringing a gardner along on adventures could be a bit tiresome...

Sam: Ohhh look at this plant, and that one, oh I especially love this one!

Sam; It's alright Mr Frodo I got him. Ok you sneaking thief, what have you done with the real Gollum, and what's more where have you hidden Mr Frodo's legs?

or

C'mon you, we got enough with that damn Wizard always uncloaking, we aint gonna stand for it from a stand in.

Quicksand is always dangerous...

Andy: Look; if he struggles it will just make it worse!

Sean: No! You need to slowly squirm out!

Elijah: Erm... I'm still sinking!

OR

Sam: Look, sir, that spandex is so 30 years ago!

Hide and Seek in...THE DEAD MARCHES!!
 

Andy: See Sean! Told you I'd find him!

Frodo and Sam may have had elven cloaks but Gollum had DAMART ....

Sam: "Hey, Frodo, this guys says he's from a drifter indention."

Guy: "No, I said 'a different dimension!'"

Sam: "Whatever. Anyway, he says he lives in union crates!"

Guy: "No! I'm from the United States!" :mad:

Sam: "Right, if you say so. :rolleyes: Well, he said he'll go for our order."

Frodo: "Oh, you're gonna pick up our pizza?"

Guy: :mad: "ACK! No, I said I 'know about Mordor!' Ah, screw it; I'm outta here." *Guy jumps through trans-dimensional rift.

Frodo: "I hope he hurries; I'm starving."

Andy Serkis teaches Frodo and Sam about wild edible plants.

The White Rabbit lures yet more unsuspecting passers-by into Wonderland...

Gollum-Rabbit: What d'you mean, you can't fit down the hole? Sheesh, I never had this much trouble with Alice...

Wrong Guide Through the Dead Marshes
 

Frodo: "Look, Sam. He hasn't a clue about how to get through these marshes. As I told you when we took up with him, pull off the wig. Even you will be able to see it's Mr. Clean!"

Lost?
 

Mr. Serkis: Hello! Can you direct me to the next inter-dimensional rift?

Andy wakes up (still in his pyjamas) and realises that the Hobbits have literally eaten him out of house and home! :eek:

OR

Sam: What have I told you about trying to steal Mr Frodo's money? I've told you a million times he's broke.

Frodo: Hay! I resent that!

Ah, ATM
 

Frodo: Sam! Get away from that anakronism!

Sorry can't resist..
 

Gollum to Sam : "I may be falling-over-drunk but Frodo's legless......"

Sam: "Don't be stupid Gollum we left Mr Legolas at Parth Galen.."

SAM: Can't you see that Mr. Frodo's stuck in it halfway?

Sam: In all my years, I never would have guessed that YOU were the White Power Ranger, Mister Serkis.

Andy: We defeats the powerss of darknesss, precious!!

Rated PG-18

Andy: HEY! You'd have "significant shrinkage" too if you were uncloaked!

Andy: "Sorry guys, but I lost my earring & I'm not filming anymore until I find it."