And so for a week or two there they did stay,
Then returned to face the music

For Sauron did beat them with a stick
Because they failed to find the Wight

"The wight what?" the replied in anger,
Thinking he made fun of their lisp



EDIT: Apologies Hookbill you're quite right it doesn't. But hey, who says a poem has to rhyme! ;)

Since when did Anger rhyme with Wight? :confused:

The fattest Orc laughed and ate a crisp
But Sauron grew wrathful and bellowed,

"May your skin turn bumpy and yellowed!
How dare you not offer me a cracker??"

But all that was left was the empty rapper.
So Sauron summoned his Mountain vehicle...

black as night and fueled with treacle,
and ran over the crispless orc

But in the road there was a fork
And he knew not which way to go

He stopped, took his ring, and so
Threw it up in the air and let it fall

But he slipped on a tennis ball
And the Ring fell to the Fire of Doom

Sauron banged his head on Mount Zoom.
"How will I know my way?" he wailed.

So Sauron's driving test he had failed
even though he designed it himself, it totally backfired it did

So the examiner's body he hid
in a pile of farmyard slurry

but the examiner turned furry
and bit Sauron in the neck.

Turning into a chicken he began to peck
at the lupine examiner's eye, who howled

And becoming a wolf, Sauron growled
Making the examiner white as a Wight

In great fear he took flight
With Sauron hot on his trail

"How dare you make me fail?”
Cried the Dark Lord as he drove

after the fearful wight, who dove
into his barrow and locked the door

All of a sudden that Wight felt sore,
for he was in our The Barrow-Wight's grave

Dug deep into a moldy cave.
Now Sauron battered on the gate

now he blew into the grate
he'd found in the side of the barrow

The wight then shot a flashing arrow
at the grate with his great bow

With a shriek, Saruon decided to go
To find Grond, with which to batter

But lo! something was the matter.
Even with Grond, the grate wouldn't break.

Up walked Tulkas, making the earth quake.
"Need a hand?" he asked, and raised his fist

But then descended a deadly mist
And poor Tulkas got quite lost.

Upon Sauron's nose, there grew a frost
And Tulkas wept for he kicked a rock

Sauron teasing the pain indeed did mock
Tulkas' sorely aching divine toes.

But, as everybody around there knows,
Tulkas tossed him to the moon.

From there to Mars, then to Neptune.
Such was the irate Vala's wrath

It made clear of Sauron's path.
But on Middle-Earth, there was no peace

For everything was covered in grease.
But then came a High Elven King,

Wearing his magic elven ring
"What is with all this grease?" he said

Replied the Wight, "Worry not your head,
or you'll hurt and redden your pointy ears."

From the elven king, you could see no tears,
but annoyance, and growing anger

"Grease is a harmful hidden danger!"
The king proclaimed for all to hear.

And nothing for the people was so dear,
as the revealment of the basic lunacy of their king.

Who with his ancient elven ring,
outlawed all grease within the land.

ALWAYS quote the previous two lines, folks.
 

But already the grease was in the sand
So the Hobbits used it to fry up some bacon