Here's one:
(From T.T.T. the book)

Frodo: No, no! Sam, you old @$$!
*Tries to lift Sam up, but he is too heavy for skinny-mini Frodo*
Frodo: Guys! Little help here!
*other LotR characters that shouldn't be there storm the scene & pull Sam up*
__________________AND:

P.J: Hey, everybody! It's time to shoot the scene. Alright, Dead Marshes; Take 1! Annnd- Cut!!!!
Sean A.: Wait you haven't even started the scene yet!
P.J: I know. I can't find our Frodo. Has anyone seen Elijah?
Viggo: Uuuuhhh, he's still searching for his tie.
P.J: Why- He doesn't need the tie to film!
Gollum: It keepsss it in its pocketesses.
Billy: Says he can't act without it.
P.J: Okay! Has anyone seen Wood's tie?
*Liv hides something behind her back & startes whistling loudly*

BEWARE THE TIE FONDLER!!!!

Okay, that was REALLY dumb...... Sorry!
[img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img]

[ May 18, 2003: Message edited by: Lily Bombadil ]

Heyyy! You're right. It does look like he's hitting himself.
Frodo; Cool sword, Bilbo- *DONK!*

[ May 18, 2003: Message edited by: Lily Bombadil ]

ahhh... it's good to be back.

Gandalf and frodo are riding the cart into the shire
-Frodo "Gandalf, i think you just hit a squirrel..."

the council of the Elves in Rivendell.

Elrond- "all rise for the council of the elves"

Figwit- "Sir, i think the dwarf is sitting"

Gimli- "I'm standing!"

Figwit- "Sitting"

Gimli- "look, this is sitting, this is standing, i'm standing"

and by the way Legolas lover, that gimli back ribs crack wasn't funny!

This isn't all that funny, but it surely would've raised a ruckus on the set of F.o.t.R.-

Aragorn & Arwen @ Imladris:
Aragorn: You cannot give me this!
Arwen: It is a gift! A gift to the foes of Mordor!
_________________ LATER.....

Boromir @ Elrond's Council:
Boromir (of the Ring): It is mine to give to whom I will. Like my heart. *kisses Aragorn*
Aragorn: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.J: CUT!!!!! CUUUUUTTTTTT!!!!!!! CUT!!!!!!!!!!!!

(In the end, they realize that there was a major misprint in the scripts) [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

LOL!!! That was SUPERB!!!

Thanks, Meela.
One Axe:
Legolas Luver*1 is going to try to blame the Gimli ribs on me. True I made it up, but I never really thought it was humourous. You know how that goes. LOL on the squirrel thing. I can just see it now... [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

these things are always so funny. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Ahh, I didn't think it was dumb.. but then again...uhh... well heck! just read my siggy! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

[ May 18, 2003: Message edited by: ElenCala Isil ]

Hobbits are hiding under the tree roots, the black rider comes...

black rider:sniiiiiffff... sniiiiiffffffff...
*falls over*

Frodo: all right, who forgot their deodorant?

I've just gone through and edited or deleted all my off-topic posts on this thread. So if anyone seems to be talking to themselves - they aren't.

~ Elentari II

But you didn't delete any bloopers that you posted... cos that would be a tragedy. I wanna keep all bloopers for my old age when I can't get on the computer any more, and the BDs are old and dusty and I need to laugh at the good ol' days.


Haldir: You have entered the realm of the lady of the wood. You cannot go back.

*Frodo squeaks and turns to run away*

*Haldir throws himself on the ground and clings to Frodo's ankles*

Haldir: PLEASE don't leave us!! I couldn't bear it if you went! I'll do anything!! ANYTHING!!! Just don't leave us... *sobs*

(um... don't ask. It just popped into my head)

LMAO good one Meela, it plays out in my head so nicely... [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

Boromir: "Give me the Ring!"
Frodo: "No!"
Boromir: *Pouts* "But whyyyyyy?" (Stamps foot)
Frodo: "Because I said so." (smiles triumphantly) "I have the ri-ing and Boromir doe-sn't, na na na na na!"
Boromir: "I hate you you're so mean to me!" (Starts wailing loudly) "Ara-goooorrrn Frodo's being mean!"
Aragorn crashes in.
"Aw poor Borimirworimir, don't woorryyy! Frodo, be nice! And what have we said about sharing?"
Frodo: "I'm sorry." (big blues stare adorably at Boromir) "You can share my ring if you really wanna."
Boromir: "Yay!!!"

Awww... that's so good!! I love it!

*wanders off awwwing at the adorable Boromir*

that's just wierd....

In moria:
Legolas is dodging the cave troll, the chain gets stuck on the pillar thingy, Legolas runs across the chain...or tries to. He trips and falls flat on his face.
"I think I've broken something..."
*holds up his bow, which is broken into two pieces*
"Oh!" (You know, just like Merry!)
I am evil today... [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img] [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img] [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img] [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

*Bows* Thankyou Meela!

Of course it's weird, One Axe! That's the beauty of it!
You guys are all beyond brilliance!
here goes;
Legolas, killing orcs at Helm's Deep-
Legolas: Another one bites the dust! Another one bites the dust! OW! Another one bites the dust! Hey! Hey! Another one bites the dust! Hey-ehh-ehh-eh-eh-yaaay!!!!!!

(In the meantime, Boromir does the wave. Yes, I DO realize he's dead already.)

Elennar, why do you 'thtay out of the thwimming pool'? Just curious, really.

In Lothlorien-
Rather than walk, Celeborn & Galadriel tango down the steps.

In Rivendell:

Elrond: Welcome to the Hotel California, Frodo Baggins.

Me: *mutters unintelligably about her strange mentality & '70s music...* [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img]

Her siggie is playing off the phrase (by Descartes, just learned about him in Philosophy) "I think, therefore I am." In hers, it's supposed to be said with a lisp. So it would really read "I sink, therefore I stay out of the swimming pool", but the s's are turned into th's. *shrugs* I think I just went into WAY too much detail. Meh.

I enjoyed the Haldir one. Good work.

I can picture Galdriel and Celeborn coming down the steps in floaty chairs, like in some odd sci-fi movie.

[ May 22, 2003: Message edited by: Lindril Arvilya ]

*Eowyn is sobbing over Theodred*

Suddenly, he sits up and turns to her, grinning inanely.

Theodred (in a Transylvanian accent): Why are you crying, my dear?


(Don't ask... Its a weird day... I could have sworn I just saw a fly bungee jumping off the hose pipe...)

Cave Troll wraps chain around around post in Moria. Legolas runs up it, but slips and straddles it.

Legolas: "OOOOOOWCH!!

PJ: CUUUUUUUUUUUT!!!

Sorry,I'm feeling a bit evil myself right now. [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

*cackles evilly then dies laughing*

AHAAHAAAAHAAAHAAA!... ahem. Errr....

Okay, here I go-
*Gandalf holds out the Ring in the tongs*
Gandalf: Hold out your hand, Frodo. It's quite cool.
*Frodo takes the Ring*
Frodo:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!!!!!!!
*He flings the Ring across the room*
*Gandalf picks up the Ring in the tongs*
Gandalf: Hmmm... Hey! What the- Made by Mirkwood Novelties?! BILBO BAGGINS!!!!!

(Meanwhile: Somewhere down the road)

Bilbo: Ah, ha, ha!
*flips the real Ring into the air, catches it on his finger, & vanishes* [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

[ May 23, 2003: Message edited by: Lily Bombadil ]

Oh, that is GOOD!!! *hands over a Blooper Award*

For me?! Oh, I couldn't possibly- okay yes I could. *takes award*
Now, if you'll all pardon me, I've got a date with the Disco King. He's taking me- well, to a Disco.

The Fellowship enter Lothlorien.

There is a lot of swooshing in the treetops, then...

"HOOOOWWWWWZZZAAAAAAAAAA!!!"

*Haldir swooshes past them on a rope, lands on the ground, does a triple somersault, and lands on Gimli's shoulders*

*The other elves jump out and applaud loudly*

In Isengard, Saruman is sitting in his chair thinking. Three evil orcs approach him.

The first Orc: "Heil Hitler!"

Saruman *rises*: "Heil Hitler!"

Moe & Curly Howard appear in the background: "Hail Hail Hailstone! Wahoo!"

And so, the true Alliegance of Saruman, long an ally to the Three Stooges and the Nazi party, is revealed.

[ May 23, 2003: Message edited by: Himaran ]

helms deep, the orcs are ready to kill all the humans. Suddenly, all the defenders of helms deep drop their weapons, make a big peace chain, and start singing "Why can't we be friends?"

The Fellowship is in Moria, in one of the deep dark caverns.
Gandalf: "Follow me." *Cartwheels along the path.
Rest of the Fellowship stands there.
Aragorn: *Clears throat.* "Well, you heard the wizard." *Cartwheels after Gandalf.*
Rest of the Fellowship glances at one another, shrug, and promptly cartwheel one after the other.

LOL!! Good one Tinuviel!

Hehehehe.... I can just see Gandalf cartwheeling...

At Bag-end after the party:

Gandalf: BILBO BAGGINS! DO NOT TAKE ME FOR SOME CONJUROR OF EXPENSIVE TRICKS! YOU KNOW I ONLY CONJURE CHEAP ONES!!!

(The questions you have are better left unasked. Trust me.)

Rather like in Robin Hood Men In Tights.

"To Die Or Not To Die"

Denethor lights the pyre and leaps onto it. He misses and lands on the floor.

Denethor: oof...

*Tries again, same thing happens*

Denethor: okay, third time lucky...

*Same thing happens*

Gandalf (leaning against the door): just face it, dude. You suck at suicide! *cannonballs onto the pyre* Wheeee...

Denethor growls and leaves the room.

Uruk-Hai attack Minas Tirith, launching various explosives into the city*

Denethor: whaaa... *boom*

An explosive lands on top of Denethor.

Hmm, I have seen it once, but I was only 9 at the time and didn't pay attention to it. Maybe it buried itself in my subconsiouss, subconsiously...

They did the can-can, but I don't think they cart-wheeled..."We're men, we're men in tights, we roam around looking for fights! We maaaay look like paaaansies...but-don't-get-us-wrong or else we'll put out your lights!" *Little John gets punched in the face by Blinking.*

I think I've seen that movie far too many times...

I think you have too [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]
Meela- before I even looked at the name I knew who had written that [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

(Saruman and Gandalf scene in Rivendell in FotR)

Saruman: You do not seriously think that a Hobbit could contend with the will of Sauron? There are none who can. Against the power of Mordor, there can be no victory. We must join with him, Gandalf. We must join with Sauron. It would be wise, my friend.
Gandalf: Tell me, friend. When did Saruman the Wise abandon reason for madness?
Saruman: But, you do not understand, my friend. He is the virus. And we are the cure.
Gandalf: (laughs) Oh, Elrond, you gave me a scare for a moment there...

(Sam's 'speech' at the end of TTT)
Sam: What if the prophecy is true? What if tomorrow the war could be over? Isn't that worth fighting for? Isn't that worth dying for, Mr. Frodo?
Frodo: *yawn* What prophecy, dude? You’ve been watching too much Matrix, man...

(Sam’s just like me !!! [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]) Sorry if I’m just a bit... Matrixish today. I’ve found my new mini-obsession. Oh, here’s another...

Galadriel: Even the smallest person can change the course of the future. There is no spoon, Frodo. Do not forget that.

*dodges rotten tomatoes a la Agent Elrond* Okay, okay! I’m done [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]

~Menelien

[ May 27, 2003: Message edited by: GaladrieloftheOlden ]

I got some too: Lord Of the Pants

Boromir: Gondor has no pants. Gondor needs no pants.

Galadriel at the beginning:
"The world is changed.
I feel it in the earth.
I feel it in the water.
I smell it in my pants."

Forming of the fellowship:
Aragorn: "You have my sword."
Legolas: "And my bow."
Gimli: "And my pants."

Galadriel: "Will you look down your pants?"
Frodo: "What will I see?"
Galadriel: "Even the wisest cannot tell."
Frodo does
Galadriel: "I know what it is you saw, for it is also in my pants."

I hope you like them.

I am very new on Barrow Downs, so I'll give it ago. Maybe alreadyhas done this but, who cares.

TTT, Legolas is jumping upon the horse he shared with Gimli, and flings himself too high and end up on the otherside of the horse;
Legolas:What just happened, where is the horse?
Gimli:Look, thats the fifth attempt of swinging yourself upon the horse. You can see the crew are getting tired.
Legolas:I must perfect this before P.J comes along and takes my place.

Thats alittle bit too weird, don't worry guys I'll get it right one day. [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img]

Do mind the spelling mistakes in my texts.


Oh when the saint, oh when the saints, oh when the saints come marching in......lala [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]