Here I go again...
 

Frodo wears a look of surprise and fear because, after all, Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

Nobody expects it indeed...


*Frodo trying to talk with the orcs that captured him in Cirith Ungol*

Orc: i mean... i never wanted to be an orc, all that ravaging and stuff... i wanted to be a lumberjack! jumping from tree to tree!

*Orcs march in dressed as Mounties*

*Frodo looks in utter surprise of how the Canadian Goverment has allowed Orcs to foul the name of the beutiful great white north*

Time for change, me thinks.

As a Mark of respect;

http://csirke.inf.elte.hu/tolkien/jrrtolk1.jpg

Tolkien: Do Balrogs have wings? Well its funny you should say that because... oh wait I'll have to get back to you!

Note the uncanny resemblance between this picture of Bilbo Baggins (drawn from the journals of S. Gamgee), and the image of the late J.R.R. Tolkien. Perhaps the professor's joking about hobbit blood was not entirely unfounded...

*OR*

Tolkien: "I just had a funny thought. If Dwarf women are similar to Dwarf men, they must have beards."

"Legolas? A blonde? Why, surely you jest, Mr. Jackson."

Frodo: Sam, I've wanted to tell you this for years but...

Sam: What Mr.Frodo?

Frodo: I have a Stye of Mt.Doom in my left eye...

*Corny drama music loops in the background...

Sometimes, I think we all need to poke fun at ourselves... When we can't find the right time, we look to others for assistance... :rolleyes:

~Diggy Dodgering Ka of Doom~

Tolkien: "You mean to say they spelled 'elfs' wrong?!"

If you remember, from the Note on the Text part of the triology, one of the printing companies altered the spellings of 'elves' to 'elfs'. This did not make Mr. Tolkien or his son too happy...



~ka~

Frodo pic
 

The Professor pic
 

The Professor was being told that sometime in the 21st century, people would debate about Balrogs' wings. He laughed at the thought of making things more difficult for them.

Heh. :p

Tolkien: Don't be silly! Gimli was a male!

Tolkien: Who is Tom Bombadill? That’s such a silly question I'm not going to dignify it with a response.

OR

Tolkien: I could play Doctor Who! I have the scarf and everything! Would you like a Jelly baby?

Professor Tolkien: The movies have made how much money?

Tolkien: Arwen's fate...tied to the ring? :chuckle: :chuckle:.

"A pig? At the Pelennor Fields?" *chuckle*

The REAL reason they changed the script...
 

Ha ha! Arwen at Helm's Deep? You really are a funny character, Mr. Jackson! Hahaha! If you were serious, I could have you sued for all you're worth! *chuckle* Mr. Jackson? Why do you look so frightened?

Tolkien: I only put Tom Bombadil in for a joke. Who would have thought they'd take him so seriously?

A little known fact...
 

Professor Tolkien's smoke blowing skills were the foundantions of what Gandalf does in FotR. Although, the Professor was so good at 'blowing smoke' (;)), they had to tone it down a bit to make it believable. :eek: :D

*After disposing of his ghostwriter's corpse, Mr. Tolkien laughs darkly at the scheme that will surely make him an international icon for years to come.*

Heh heh...... <-----insert evil smiley here

...Some said he was just happy. Others thought he had a dirty secret. I say it was the "don`t pull a face to much or it will get stuck that way" rule...

Balrog wings? Elf-ears? No, such trifles will pass with hardly a blink, I think. Not much opportunity for discussion there, is there?

To Sauce:
 

Professor Tolkien: What Orcish redemption? Skewer them with a spear and be through with it!

Tolkien had been turning in his grave so often over the past few years that he decided there was no point in hanging around in a coffin. With a smile in his heart and the pelt of a warg wrapped around his neck, he wanders off in search of the people who keep him from resting in peace.

In other news, hordes of mary-sue fanfic writers seem to have dissappeared off the face of the earth. Peter Jackson fears he may be next. Full coverage at 11.

New pic
 

Sauron: Does this ring make me look prettier do you think?

EDIT: The pic's on my computer, so the only way it can be viewed is by clicking the attachment. Cheers.

Sauron the Horrible:
 

I have that much multi-coloured robes! Beat that, Saruman!

or

What's with the hand? I thought I was just an Eye! :confused:

Tolkein Pic: 'My books? Made into a film? Hahahahahahaha! Nono, wait....you're serious?'

Sauron: Talk to the hand, fo' shizzle!

Tolkien: (trying his best Gollum impression) Itsssss mine, my own, my precccciouuuusss.

Sauron: The cover of Sauron's new CD, with hits like....

Eye see you

The Void

I see a red eye and I want to paint it black (remake of the Rolling Stones)

One is the loneliest number (remake of whoever sang that song)

It aint easy being a Dark Lord

and many more....

Sauron: "NOOO! Isiadur has a sword! MUST USE POWERS!"

*Has fingers cut off*

Sauron: "Should've seen that coming" *dies*

*As the hobbit custodian does his rounds, he peeks through a door where the "One ring: The music video" is being filimed*

Sauron: Stop! corrupting time now!

*crazy orcish beepboxing*

Sauron: Can't kill me! na na na na na! ahh my ri-*dies*

Sauron: To be, or not to be? That is the question....

Whilst Frodo is dwindling on the Mount Doom cleft by one hand, Frodo sees Sauron instead of Sam. Don't you dare let go little boy! Reaaaachhh!

Sauron: My Precious!!!!

The Sauron pic:
 

Mordor. Always reaching out a helping hand in times of need.

Sauron: MY jelly donut! MINE!!!

Oh crud! I gots a marshmallow stuck on my finger!

Is that smoke?
 

Sauron: Smell my hand.

The "Does this make me look fat?" of evil overloads with only a few fingers to spare
 

Sauron: Do you think this shade of black makes my nails look anymore 'mysterious'?? *Does the all-too-common slight twist of the wrist motion associated with nailpolish itself...


~I'm revolting right now. The real Ka will get back to you on a pike...~

Sauron: I said he's being too kind but he insisted buying a 24 carat ring...not to mention nothing about the size of the gem!