If Sauron came to you with 1,000,000 orcs, you would...
 

What would you do?
I'd kill them with my sword, but that is me.

Do you have 1,000,000 arms?

Personally, I'd start singing a soothing tune, and slowly back away while they all stood dumbfounded.

I would tell him it wasn't nearly enough for my purposes and not to bother me again until he had recruited a proper army. I would then suggest, should this unsatisfactory performance continue, he might lose that promotion to the balrog (a real self-starter).

Set my 100 million Elves on him............

Tell them they've come too late.

Sic the cats on 'em.

Hoestly, have you ever seen what a thrown cat can do to somebody? Well, neither have I, but I can't imagine it would be pretty.

Then I would run over to the local cat-breeder for more ammunition, which rather than causing a swath of destruction through the Orc ranks (ours are so irritable!), would distract them all through sheer cuteness long enough for me to run away. Any who tried to chase after us would trip over the cats circling their ankles.

Alternatively, set up a bunch of hilarious traps (mostly involving cats), then pull out my practice bow (complete with roundish-tipped arrows), toy sword (an accessory for a game), and two Wii remotes (hey, one of the available games is "swordplay," so they should work in real life, right?) and hope they all die of laughter before I'm forced to actually make a last stand.

Prolly get them to sign a petition for any cause I might be sponsoring at the moment; a million's a lot of signatures! :Merisu:

do the Safety Dance.

Call upon the Legolas fans for help
 

Call upon all the legions of Legolas fans for help, saying that once I'm dealt with he'll be next on Sauron's list. :D

Throw man flesh at them, like that stuff fishers do to lure sharks, and run. What I'm doing with human parts that I can throw at people, don't ask. I think I might have had an argument with someone earlier.

Run up a huge mountain using my elf fitness skills and shoot them down, one by one. (while yelling horrible things at them)

Bow down to him, like we should anyways.

What would I do?
 

Pretend that I'm Morgoth returned, give out about how they've all gone soft, then tell them all to go back home and not return until they're evil enough. :D

I would have a pressing engagement elsewhere and hightail it out of there as quickly as possible.

Run.

I would have called godzilla and told him to stomp on them.it would be an orcs massacre

Fight until my last breath. That'd be the best thing to do.

Plead to eru to destroy them all and kill sauron.

I would obey the last command of Gandalf the Grey and "Fly!"

Discretion is often the better part of valour, after all.

*point* They went that way. :Merisu:

Put on a black cloak (I have one of those!) and join the ranks. It worked for Frodo and Sam, and with a million orcs all in one place it's not like anyone's going to be keeping track.

It would be nice to think I could use that disguise to sneak up on Sauron (who is apparently there in person) and stab him in the back a la Wormtongue, but a) unless my replica Sting is hiding a big secret that wouldn't work and b) I am a klutz. I'd probably just wait until they spread out enough and duck out into cover. Again, it worked for Frodo and Sam.

hS

[http://forum.barrowdowns.com/images/...ron;737204]Put on a black cloak (I have one of those!) and join the ranks. It worked for Frodo and Sam, and with a million orcs all in one place it's not like anyone's going to be keeping track.

It would be nice to think I could use that disguise to sneak up on Sauron (who is apparently there in person) and stab him in the back a la Wormtongue, but a) unless my replica Sting is hiding a big secret that wouldn't work and b) I am a klutz. I'd probably just wait until they spread out enough and duck out into cover. Again, it worked for Frodo and Sam.

hS[/QUOTE]

Wow. You really thought that through. :eek:

I think it is the best plan so far.