The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/index.php)
-   The Barrow-Downs (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/forumdisplay.php?f=21)
-   -   Time to come clean (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/showthread.php?t=15487)

Boromir88 05-22-2009 09:29 AM

Time to come clean
 
I hate to drop this bombshell right now, I don't expect anyone to understand it, I still don't really know why I did it. I realize now I need to after hurting several people I've grown to care about.

I am Kent2010. The pictures on the photo page I recently put up, that is me. The photos of the cocher spaniel, that I posted as Boromir88, that is my little puppy.

Everything I said over the years, about what has recently happened to my father, that is true. Everything I have said about where I supposedly worked, those were my father's jobs. I did work for him at Phantom fireworks, but when he quit, so did I. Being a Michigan fan who lives in Ohio, because his dad is from Michigan, that is true too. Everything I have shared with all of you happened to, or effected someone I knew. The personal stories I have shared, it is all true. I don't why you would believe me now, after all these years, but I swear it.

What I have lied about, and deceived was my actual age. I don't know why I decided to morph my life with my dad's and appear older, because usually people want to be younger. It started out because I was really young, worried about why my parents said about chatting with people over the internet, but still wanted to get on and talk about LOTR. So, I created this Boromir88 screen name.

I wasn't expecting to make the connections I have over the years, I just wanted to talk LOTR. The fact that I became very close to many of you, and that I was lying about my age was tearing me up. My ultimate plan was to Make Boromir88 disappear completely, and insert Kent2010, because I wasn't going to be able to keep up the facade. I didn't think it would matter, even though as Boromir I made some really amazing friendships. I figured I could just weed Boromir out and be Kent, to stop the act.

Eventhough I have created these split names, everything you know about Boromir88, is true, everything is real. They either personally happened to me, my father, or effected one of my friends/family members. That is me and that is my personality. It was tearing me up, but once I found out that it hurt the people I care deeply about, because it looks like a massive lie for 4-5 years now, it is too much.

Admins, whatever you want to do it is your choice, I will accept any consequences for the deceipt I have caused. I would like to continue to come here as Kent2010, as who I am. But if you have to ban me than do it and it will be deserved.

'Downers, I am sorry for the years of lies, words can not express it. This isn't for self-pity, you should all be angry at me and rightfully, I've kept this fake act for too long. I want you to know that despite the act, you all have come to mean so much to me, and it was all real. To see the pain that I have caused is indescribable, and if you want me to leave I will understand.

John
Senior at Kent St.
History Ed. Major

alatar 05-22-2009 09:56 AM

I care not that you are one or two people with one or two nicks, but just want to add this from here:

Quote:

Originally Posted by alatar
Though at this time I have no evidence - nor will I present any - but once a member had two nicks, and would have the most interesting conservations with himself/herself. Again, I have no proof, but the posting was just too 'in sync' to be posted by more than one brain.

Though I had no proof that you were as this, and I wouldn't bother to see if you ever conversed with yourself (I do it all the time within my own head) it's nice to see that making shotgun guesses can sometimes pan out...;)

Anyway, glad to have you here, whomever you are. :)

Aganzir 05-22-2009 10:17 AM

Wow.

Well that comes as a little shock. Not that you did it but that you got so far with it.

Anyway I just want to tell that at least to me it really doesn't matter, and I wouldn't like you to leave. You've contributed so much to the forum and made this such an enjoyable place that a few facts here and there don't make a big difference.

But grrr! I hope you didn't lure me to say anything nasty about Boro while I was PMing with Kent a while ago! :Merisu: :p

Elmo 05-22-2009 10:18 AM

I'm really the Barrow-wight's alter ego. Let's keep that hush hush now though. :p

Inziladun 05-22-2009 10:19 AM

I don't know you well, Boro / Kent, but I've much enjoyed interacting with you as both. As someone who has always physically given the impression of being much younger than I am, I can somewhat empathize.
However, here at the Downs, I've never doubted there are younger members here who can run rings around me with their general wealth of Tolkien knowledge (and ruthless skullduggery at WW :)).
I suppose all I have left to say is that I believe any fears you may have had about people not taking you seriously because of youth were completely groundless.
Your posts speak for themselves.

Hookbill the Goomba 05-22-2009 10:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elmo (Post 597649)
I'm really the Barrow-wight's alter ego. Let's keep that hush hush now though. :p

So am I. :eek:
I'm also Mister Underhill, the Saucepan Man and Esty. I did spend some time as Frodo495995, but gave it up.

But, seriously, Boroman, Kentishman, Borokent?... The only think that has me is... are the photos I used in my paper the REAL you? I wouldn't want to be slandering someone I don't know. THAT would be silly. Now, can I get a quote from you on this? Something along the lines of "And I would have gotten away with it too if it weren't for you meddling kids!"?

We're all happy to welcome you, no matter what name you chose to go under. :)

A Little Green 05-22-2009 10:24 AM

I did wonder how come Kent was so shrewd at WW... :rolleyes:

alatar 05-22-2009 10:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hookbill the Goomba (Post 597651)
The only think that has annoyed me is... are the photos I used in my paper the REAL you? I wouldn't want to be slandering someone I don't know

I assume that the next addition of the newspaper will exploit...er, I mean, explore this revelation to death.

Hookbill the Goomba 05-22-2009 10:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alatar (Post 597653)
I assume that the next addition of the newspaper will exploit...er, I mean, explore this revelation to death.

Pfft! I can't report FACTS! What kind of newspaper do you think I'm running here? :p

Coming back to the matter in hand. I'm not sure what made you think The Downs wasn't a place for younger people? I mean, I was a brainless teenager when I started on the Downs. But no one was very cruel to me, despite my silliness. So... Meh, maybe I'm missing something... :confused:

Legate of Amon Lanc 05-22-2009 10:44 AM

Well, I can only join the line of shocked people, but I guess that is just natural. In either case, I can imagine it must have been really bad when it got so far and you could not get back so easily. But now that you came out, I guess you have passed the problem. And it seems fine.

In any case, I don't know Kent that well, but I have seen Boro posting a lot, and I respected him for his wise posting. So, under whichever identity, I hope that this posting will continue :)

P.S. And to add one curiosity - when I saw the thread title, I started to expect something like that, but in fact, my first thought was that the revelation would be that you are a woman. :D

Boromir88 05-22-2009 10:50 AM

Sorry Hookbill, the guy on the photo page was a random google image I found after typing in "man dressed as Boromir."

I thank you all for your words and wishes to let me stay, but please scold me, call me foolish or something, because the truth is if I didn't find out that I was caught, and upset some friends who have been there for me, I would not have said this.

I would request though that one of the accounts be deleted, preferably this one. Is that something for the admins, or can we delete our own accounts?

Aganzir 05-22-2009 11:03 AM

If your account was deleted, I believe all your posts would disappear, and that would be a loss of over 4,000 posts, so from the other users' point of view that doesn't sound very good.

And my opinion is that you should keep the Boro account. I think it's easier to get used to Boro being younger than to Kent being Boro. I understand, though, if you or someone else disagrees with me on this.

skip spence 05-22-2009 11:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boromir88 (Post 597657)
but please scold me, call me foolish or something, because the truth is if I didn't find out that I was caught, and upset some friends who have been there for me, I would not have said this.

Well, posting pictures of that adorable puppy just before coming clean, thus winning sympathy, was a sly move. And those wet big eyes looks almost too blue to be true, haha. Shame on you!

Elmo 05-22-2009 11:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aganzir (Post 597658)
If your account was deleted, I believe all your posts would disappear, and that would be a loss of over 4,000 posts, so from the other users' point of view that doesn't sound very good.

And my opinion is that you should keep the Boro account. I think it's easier to get used to Boro being younger than to Kent being Boro. I understand, though, if you or someone else disagrees with me on this.

Posts don't disappear, I remember when that Neithan Tol Turambar guy was banned. What a legend. :smokin:

Boromir88 05-22-2009 11:07 AM

Quote:

I mean, I was a brainless teenager when I started on the Downs. But no one was very cruel to me, despite my silliness. So... Meh, maybe I'm missing something...~Hookbill
I really don't know, young stupidity or whatever it was...I think at the time I was 15 or 16, and my parents just allowed me to create my first sn but got on me about the dangers of the internet. I hid from them that I even came here, not because of LOTR, my dad is the reason I read the books, watched the movies, and my mom absolutely loved the movies. It was more of just talking with people on-line, and I wanted to get everything Tolkien, but was worried about being seen as a young ignoramus and wanting to fit in. I saw posts from Fordim, davem, and Lal, and Esty and many others and just wanted to be able to post and have the knowledge they did. So, I read and read..etc Then being introduced to werewolf brought out the still youthful silliness and IMing/PMing with many of you opened up sharing some personal details. Basically, I got hooked, at first wanting to come to a place to talk about LOTR and Tolkien, and learn from Fordim et all, to having a strong connection and community feeling about the place. If that makes any sense.

Don't worry Agan, you have never said anything that has gotten me flustered. As I have told you I admire your werewolving and am in love with it, I meant it. In phantoms last game when you said I was acting like your brothers, that's kind of where I seriously began to just spill out everything. But regretably I didn't do it until people got hurt.

Legate if you know Boro than you know Kent. Just that it is my father who works for the Road engineers/was the HR rep for Phantom Fireworks and it was me who was his peon/attending a college university.

Aganzir 05-22-2009 11:08 AM

Yes but I believe banning is a different thing than deleting the whole account.

Or would deleting the account just mean that the user profile goes but the posts stay?

edit: xed with Boro - aww thank you. :) And no I wasn't referring just to you but the team of you, Kuru and who was the last one? I don't remember, anyway, you were causing such a chaos that it reminded me of how it's always at home. :p

alatar 05-22-2009 11:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boromir88 (Post 597657)
I thank you all for your words and wishes to let me stay, but please scold me, call me foolish or something, because the truth is if I didn't find out that I was caught, and upset some friends who have been there for me, I would not have said this.

What I'm interested in, lacking a conscience myself, is, what prompted you to 'come clean?' Besides the advice of, if and whenever caught, to 'deny, deny, deny' and when that doesn't work, implement an 'onion defense,' and then when all else fails, assert your Fifth Amendment rights (for those of us in the USA), to admit wrongdoing is just so unnarcissitic.

If you've hurt people, do whatever it takes to make it right with them - each may be an individual case.

Legate of Amon Lanc 05-22-2009 11:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aganzir (Post 597658)
If your account was deleted, I believe all your posts would disappear, and that would be a loss of over 4,000 posts, so from the other users' point of view that doesn't sound very good.

And my opinion is that you should keep the Boro account. I think it's easier to get used to Boro being younger than to Kent being Boro. I understand, though, if you or someone else disagrees with me on this.

I was actually thinking along the same lines. It is actually very, very strange and that's what I was partially referring to when saying that "I don't know Kent". Of course, by that I meant simply that I have read many posts from Boro, but only a little from Kent, but in any case, there is an interesting psychological effect. I think maybe indeed starting to take Boro as younger and as real you would be far easier for many. But it's up to you, Kent/Boro, that is the main point. Only if you f.ex. think people should know that all the contributions of Boro are yours - as they certainly were many, and worthy.

Legate of Amon Lanc 05-22-2009 11:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alatar (Post 597663)
What I'm interested in, lacking a conscience myself, is, what prompted you to 'come clean?' Besides the advice of, if and whenever caught, to 'deny, deny, deny' and when that doesn't work, implement an 'onion defense,' and then when all else fails, assert your Fifth Amendment rights (for those of us in the USA), to admit wrongdoing is just so unnarcissitic.

If you've hurt people, do whatever it takes to make it right with them - each may be an individual case.

Not everybody is the cheating politician such as you, alatar. But I am not going to step on the thin ice and start thinking about googling the pictures of your family...

Thinlómien 05-22-2009 11:26 AM

Dear Boro/Kent,

if I'm to be blunt I have to say I'm hurt. I thought it's best if someone says that aloud.

But I also want to say that internet gives everyone anonymity so that they can be who they will so you have not done anything wrong in that sense, and that this thing does not lessen my respect for your wonderful contributions all around the forum and I still want to be your friend...

I feel like I want to talk with you a bit more, but I'll send you a PM, hope that's ok. :) And although your initial cheating might have been (ha! sir Robinish ;)) I very much admire your courage in coming clean with this now. It must have taken a lot. You're a brave man.

PS. And as for playing ww as Kent - I must admit wondering if he was the phantom's alter ego! :D

Estelyn Telcontar 05-22-2009 12:08 PM

Age is irrelevant.
Resistance is futile.
You have been assimilated.

alatar 05-22-2009 12:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Legate of Amon Lanc (Post 597665)
Not everybody is the cheating politician such as you, alatar. But I am not going to step on the thin ice and start thinking about googling the pictures of your family...

As I've always said, I've nothing to hide...as I've already taken care of any loose Google searches. :D

Another thing I find interesting, BoroKent, is that I too, when joining this forum, was a bit intimidated, and yet I'm as old as many here (if not older...though I could be lying about that as well ;)), and so in a sense I can understand why you may have chosen the path you did.

Why, I might have even been tempted to write with a British accent (for you 'Mericans out there, it's easy to do. Just misspell words like 'colour' by adding in an extra 'u,' and for any word ending in 'zation,' just swap the 's' for the 'z.' It's that easy!).

Inziladun 05-22-2009 12:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alatar (Post 597672)
Why, I might have even been tempted to write with a British accent (for you 'Mericans out there, it's easy to do. Just misspell words like 'colour' by adding in an extra 'u,' and for any word ending in 'zation,' just swap the 's' for the 'z.' It's that easy!).

You too, hmm? I do that on occasion, but for me it's mainly a symptom of my chronic Anglophilia.

Eönwë 05-22-2009 12:52 PM

Wow!

Now that's omwthing I hadn't expected- even though I thought that Kent 2010 seemed to know his way round a little too much, and seemed a little to reserved to be a new member- and more spread out, if you get what I mean.

I believe you can just get your account "closed" (like with all those members with low post counts that you occasionally see while browsing thee 'Downs), which would still let you keep your posts.
However, in my opinion, I think you should keep the Boro account, because that is basically what you've posted as you on the 'Downs, no matter what your real age is.


Another mystery solved- Now we know what the 88 stands for!

Eönwë 05-22-2009 12:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alatar (Post 597672)
Why, I might have even been tempted to write with a British accent (for you 'Mericans out there, it's easy to do. Just misspell words like 'colour' by adding in an extra 'u,' and for any word ending in 'zation,' just swap the 's' for the 'z.' It's that easy!).

I think that it's you Americans who misspell (the clue is in the name "English").
And the accent does give what you write a more Tolkienish feel, perhaps.

Ok- We each make fun the other's accent.

It's quite a telling feature though, as people can subconsiously reveal things like that. Many a time have I been surprised to find that a Downer is not from where I expected.


Quote:

Originally Posted by Legate of Amon Lanc (Post 597655)
P.S. And to add one curiosity - when I saw the thread title, I started to expect something like that, but in fact, my first thought was that the revelation would be that you are a woman. :D

*Laughs uncontrollably*

Boromir88 05-22-2009 12:59 PM

If it helps anyone...

My birthday is indeed April 25, just not in '69 but...guess...'88. :rolleyes:

When I can actually get a good connection I will reactivate my facebook page, to completely shatter the image of a middle-aged single man. But I do hope any type of brotherly figure hasn't been shattered, I advise a quiz bowl team, I am going into student teaching next semester. That is actually the reason I deactivated Facebook (not to cover-up anything), but because I am going into a school system. So when I can get there, and post the link I will re-activate it, you can check out my profile, but I will probably deactivate it very soon to protect myself from all those young'uns looking to cause me grief. :p

wilwarin538 05-22-2009 01:03 PM

Awww Boro, you're such a sweetheart, really. The internet gives everyone the ability to be whoever, and I think lots of people probably fib a bit to make themselves seem better then who they are. So I am honestly not bothered by this, though I am sightly shocked, but definitely not angry with you. I'm definitely not going to scold you. :)

I personaly think you should keep the Boro account, since that's what most of us are more familiar with, I never really got to know Kent much, so even though my brain knows you're the same it would be hard to be as familiar with Kent as I am with Boro. Wow, this is kinda trippy. But of course, it's totally up to you whichever you want to keep. :)

wilwarin538 05-22-2009 01:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boromir88 (Post 597678)
If it helps anyone...

My birthday is indeed April 25, just not in '69 but...guess...'88. :rolleyes:

When I can actually get a good connection I will reactivate my facebook page, to completely shatter the image of a middle-aged single man. But I do hope any type of brotherly figure hasn't been shattered, I advise a quiz bowl team, I am going into student teaching next semester. That is actually the reason I deactivated Facebook (not to cover-up anything), but because I am going into a school system. So when I can get there, and post the link I will re-activate it, you can check out my profile, but I will probably deactivate it very soon to protect myself from all those young'uns looking to cause me grief. :p

hehe, I'm a student teacher too, and I have to be careful about my facebook account. You don't want one of the 12 year olds in your class to go home and be like "Look mommy, there's a pic of my student teacher with a hangover." Not that I drink though....but still. :p Even 12 year olds have facebook, you never know what they'll dig up.

To be totally honest I had no idea you were "supposed" to be that old, I had always thought you were maybe in your early to mid twenties.

Eomer of the Rohirrim 05-22-2009 01:10 PM

Don't worry about it, man - we all have masks. I believe HerenIstarion once made that point. ;)

And we all have deep, dark secrets, concerning things we may or may not have done, perhaps here on the Downs itself, perhaps something which led to a large in-joke, for which the originator never admitted responsibility, which we swore never to reveal to others.

:Merisu:

Boromir88 05-22-2009 01:58 PM

Alright...so I managed to reactivate and I have requested to join the facebook group. Now I swear that little blue man as my profile picture that says "the one you can depend on," that was something a friend did for me, and has been up for months. I didn't just stick that up there 5 seconds ago. :D

Aganzir 05-22-2009 02:01 PM

*just imagines how shocked Form will be if he checks Facebook before the Downs* :D

satansaloser2005 05-22-2009 03:28 PM

I think I have to go check my tea and see if it was spiked. I'll be back later. :p

radagastly 05-22-2009 04:22 PM

For what it's worth, I think a certain amount of deception and anonymity on the 'net is merely prudent. It's really just a kind of firewall, a smart move usually.

I also just now discovered there was a Barrow Downs group on Facebook. I put in my request to join as well . . .

p.s.--my alter-ego here is "ainur" though I can't remember his password. That's how radagastly came to be.

Feanor of the Peredhil 05-22-2009 04:39 PM

It appears that others forgive blatant deception pretty easily.

Pitchwife 05-22-2009 04:56 PM

Dear Boro/Kent,
although I don't know either of you really well, I'd like to say that I know exactly how you felt when you started this thread. About fifteen years ago, I did something very similar (lying to all of my friends over a couple of years) in RL - a very difficult period in my life that I'm anything but proud of in retrospect, and I remember every bit of it. Feeling like a piece of **** all the time. The need to avoid certain subjects in conversation so as not to entangle myself in more and more lies. How hard it was to work up the courage to tell the truth - first to one person, then to another, then to another (it got easier with the time). And the joyous surprise when almost all of them forgave me, said it was good to have the real me back, and helped me to deal with the bigger problems I was facing at the time (and which had driven me to lying in the first place).
From my perspective, what you have done is comparably harmless - but I congratulate you on the courage of coming out; and I'm glad you seem to be getting much the same kind of response I got. (A marvelous bunch of people, these Downers!)
Anyway, I've enjoyed reading your posts under either name, and I hope to read more in the future!

Isabellkya 05-22-2009 05:13 PM

I understand to some extent where you are coming from.
When I first got introduced to the internet, I was twelve or thirteen - and one of the conditions my parents gave me, was to not reveal any type of personal information about myself. Otherwise they would look over my shoulder, or check everything I did - to make sure I wasn't mixing with nefarious people. It became a hassle so I just figured it would be easier to wait a few years.

I'm quite as shocked as other people. As I had no clue. It doesn't mean I take back my actions from that game though. Nope!

I do agree though, keeping the name Boro would be much easier to deal with than Kent. As I still see them as separate people. Though, whatever you choose! xD

Elmo 05-22-2009 05:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Feanor of the Peredhil (Post 597698)
It appears that others forgive blatant deception pretty easily.

It's only teh internet. Is it really that important that it needs to be 'forgiven'?

Boromir88 05-22-2009 05:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elmo (Post 597702)
It's only teh internet. Is it really that important that it needs to be 'forgiven'?

With all due respect, I have talked with some of these members for 4-5 years who thought they were talking to someone else and now realize that was all fake. I appreciate all the understanding and I appreciate all the kindness, but this is my doing and I've wanted to do this to lift off a giant burden, whatever happens now happens...I can accept any of the consequences.

alatar 05-22-2009 06:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Feanor of the Peredhil (Post 597698)
It appears that others forgive blatant deception pretty easily.

If any of you are without sin...:rolleyes:

FotP, I could see if it were someone like me, who may try to manipulate others for gain, rep points or just mere amusement; to actively set out to deceive people with the intent of causing pain, suffering, delusion, acne, summer reruns, etc. Someone who is wise as a serpent and and harmless as a sneezing Ebola-laden dove with a case of the runs. Someone old enough, and with the means and wit to know better, someone 'tall' enough to never to be in over his/her head.

I'm not the best one to judge here, but it this the case with BoroKent?

Rumil 05-22-2009 06:57 PM

Let him cast the first stone
 
Don't worry mate,

sounds like its not a problem. I must say that I've rarely believed 100% in online personas, in fact it would be silly to do so.

Maybe I should start an account where I'm 16 again ! ;)

Cheers,

Rumil


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:05 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.