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littlemanpoet 05-08-2005 07:40 PM

What do you "assign" to the Shire?
I feel we could stand to balance the negative
of Mordorian assignments with something more positive.
The contrast to Mordor
is not Valinor,
which is beyond the girth
of Middle Earth.
It's the Shire.
So in case you tire
of assigning from your ire
to Mordor, you might desire
to give some thought
to what you're quite sure ought
to be in the idyllic Shire.

I'll start.

Groves of tall trees never to be cut down.

Neighborhoods in which people passing by greet each other as a matter of course.

mormegil 05-08-2005 09:18 PM

People who are willing to help for no public recognition or money

Gil-Galad 05-09-2005 07:20 AM

All my lady-friends from the downs of course... :smokin:

LalwendŰ 05-09-2005 07:54 AM

Cold, malty ales freshly hand pulled from oak barrels, served in heavy glass tankards?

Vast trenchers brimming with succulent roast beef, strong cheeses and fresh crusty bread?

Large chocolate cakes with chunks of fudge and with rich, foaming cream just falling out from the centres?

And then a nice soft lawn under a shady tree, beside a babbling brook, the perfect place to sleep it all off?

Oddwen 05-09-2005 09:22 AM

Hobbits, of course. ;)

Mithalwen 05-09-2005 11:24 AM

Dry cider and soft red wines.

Welsh butter.

Homemade marmalade - not too sweet.

Toad in the hole

Treacle pudding

(Well I think they would like a lot of food..)

Tabby & tortoiseshell cats -if the fine breeds are destined for Mordor let the Shire have down to earth moggies.

Larkspur and bluebells cornflowers and poppies - typical country garden and woodland/meadow flowers. The sort you usually can't buy.

Down duvets and pillows

Huge, squishy sofas and sheepskin cushions.

"Traditional Afternoon" tea

"The Archers" and Radio 4

I am going to stop now since I can hear the Elgar Cello Concerto playing....... :eek:

wilwarin538 05-09-2005 03:25 PM

Every member of the downs.

All the teachers who passed me.

All members of the downs.

The colour blue.

Happy faces. :)

Did I mention all the downers! ;)

Nimrodel_9 05-09-2005 05:03 PM

Flowers, music, poetry, books, late nights, late mornings, and the smell of cookies baking?

Encaitare 05-09-2005 05:10 PM

Libraries. Forget cellar door; public library are two of the most beautiful words in the world.

Elianna 05-09-2005 07:19 PM

My big brother telling me bedtime stories in his deep bass voice, or my big sister who is L˙thien...

Just bed time stories in general. Grand adventure, eucatastrophe, and "happily ever after, till the end of his days..."

Home-made banana nut bread, still warm from the oven.

mormegil 05-10-2005 10:19 AM

Tolkien and his all his works

Anguirel 05-10-2005 10:40 AM

Lots of things I love just don't seem appropriate for the Shire. I can't really see the Gaffer much appreciating Anthony and Cleopatra...I'm more of a Grey Havens or Lothlorien type really...

However, elderflower cake.
Eggs so orange-yolked you think there's a fire.
Good stilton.
Courgettes and their golden flowers.
Lemon curd.
Hog roasts.

What, you say, something non-edible? Alright, if you insist. Punts. A perfect way to travel down the Brandywine (though preferably with someone else doing the work...)

Gil-Galad 05-10-2005 04:54 PM

Not to be a jerk but it was Antony and Cleopatra, a simple mistake i can assure you that

Celebuial 05-11-2005 02:29 AM


Chocolate eclairs

Really big bath tubs

Lots of Bubble bath

Books to read in the bath

Kingsize beds


Elianna 05-11-2005 05:54 AM


Originally Posted by Celebuial

And of course Pillow fights. :D

Lathriel 05-11-2005 04:55 PM

Ice cream !!!!!!



Fellow tolkienites

of course libraries too :D

Celebuial 05-16-2005 07:00 AM

How about giant libraries full with all the Tolkien and Tolkien related book's ever written, that have sofa's and kingsize beds and pillows and allow food and pillow fights as long as the book's aren't harmed? And maybe special bathrooms so you can read in the bath? And big window's to let all the light in? That sound's like a good way to sum everything up, what do ya think?

Elonve 05-22-2005 10:47 PM

Song, dance, ale!

Homemade butter like mama makes it...

warm fresh "hearth" brown bread.

soup... especially mushroom!

scones and clotted cream.

sitting in front of the fire while torents of rain fall from the sky cuddeled up on your loved ones lap with the dog at your feet and a blanket over all of you while reading poetry to each other and sipping hot cocoa with little marshmellows and whipped cream on top.

fresh organic vegetables.

having a picnic on a clear full moon night...

roast chicken with tiny crisp potatoes and sweet carrots around the chicken. with stuffing of waterchestnuts and wild honey and bread ... gravy of course...

steamed puddings

i can go on and on!

Anal black

Eomer of the Rohirrim 05-27-2005 04:06 PM

Perhaps redundant because the Shire will already have it but.....

Peace and quiet. :D

That is the best.

Evisse the Blue 05-29-2005 03:39 PM

Chocolate that you melt in a cup of hot coffee with milk.

Quiet summer evenings.

The scent of lilac flowers.

The scent of freshly mown grass.

Fresh fruits.

Fresh air. (truly fresh and unpolluted, rare thing, nowadays. Of course, the Shire will have that on its own, but I'll send it just to be sure ;D).

Fluffy creatures.

Irish music.

Kath 05-29-2005 03:52 PM

Hot chocolate on a really cold day.

Everything soft and peaceful.


Grass and greenery.


Orominuialwen 05-29-2005 06:50 PM

Brat Fest. Four days devoted entirely to the consumption of sausage (brats, otherwise known as bratwurst) to raise money for charity. I just got home from 5 hours of wrapping brats...

Larien Telemnar 05-29-2005 07:39 PM

Reading a good book by a warm fire with a warm cup of tea.

Getting a letter from a long lost friend.



Babies of all kinds!

Chocolate: Light, Milk, Dark, White, any kind!

Cooking, and eating good food!

Friends and friendly get togethers.

Card Games.

Boiled Eggs.

No Orcs!

People who make you smile and feel better after feeling really bad all day! Thanks all! :D

Elonve 05-30-2005 11:00 PM

Bailieys Irish cream! ;)
The girls next door forum

Mad Baggins 06-02-2005 08:56 PM

Large comfortable, cushy chairs and large comfortable, cushy ottomans.

Fresh, clean, crisp vegetables and fruit.


Roaring fires and blankets to curl up in on a cold night.

A cool pond to swim in.

Many, many friends.

Elonve 06-02-2005 11:06 PM

fish 'n' chips (with vinegar!) :D :p


Larien Telemnar 06-04-2005 07:49 PM



Goats milk!




(I'm hungry, can you tell? :D uh, fish 'n' chips with vinegar?) :confused:

littlemanpoet 06-05-2005 06:28 AM

I take it, Larien Telemnar, that you are not British, nor live on the east coast of the U.S.? Fish and chips (with vinegar) is a British favorite, comparable to the U.S. predilection for a burger and fries. Or maybe that's a bad example. Pizza and beer? Oh, that's another import. um...... I think you get the idea.... :p

Garen LiLorian 06-05-2005 04:36 PM

Antique books
Leather armchairs
Big dogs (in front of the fireplaces)
Rooms that contain the above
The sort of New-England/European/English thing of having really narrow streets lined with actual houses
Irish Coffee

Larien Telemnar 06-05-2005 05:00 PM


Originally Posted by littlemanpoet
I take it, Larien Telemnar, that you are not British, nor live on the east coast of the U.S.?

Noop, I live in the midwest. I've only left the state a few times, but I hope to visit other countries someday! Yep, this Hobbit's going on adventures!



Round Doors.

Strider 06-06-2005 02:27 AM


Orominuialwen 06-06-2005 05:19 PM

Warm apple pie

Big mugs of whole milk

Window seats

Waking up late on a Saturday morning with the sun streaming in through an open window on to your pillow.

Ceili dancing

Instrumental folk music

Violins and mandolins


Lying in the grass under a tree, reading



The Ragg. It reminds me of the Springle-Ring.

Encaitare 06-06-2005 07:42 PM

Finding a particularly soft patch of grass.

Lying on the lawn with one's friends and lounging doing nothing in particular.

Children with big eyes and big smiles.

Elonve 06-06-2005 11:21 PM

what i imagine vienna to be like.


beautiful cobble stone streets with ancient beautiful houses of arcitextural wonder...

or like The Beacon in penryth :smokin:

Holbytlass 07-02-2005 10:53 PM

funny people that share stories of their past and you laugh so deep and hearty that your sides ache.

Lhunardawen 07-03-2005 04:33 AM


Originally Posted by Larien Telemnar
Chocolate: Light, Milk, Dark, White, any kind!

Unfortunately, white chocolate has been sent to Mordor.

There's only one thing I can think of right now...bubbles!

Holbytlass 07-03-2005 07:59 AM


Originally Posted by Lhunardawen
Unfortunately, white chocolate has been sent to Mordor.

Muwahaha- by yours truly :D I didn't mention it here because I was trying to keep things upbeat!

Estelyn Telcontar 07-03-2005 09:09 AM

I would assign patchwork and quilts to the Shire. With the Hobbits' love of bright colours and comfortable things, I can well imagine them sewing leftover bits of their clothing fabrics into cheerful patterns for blankets and other things. There would be cotton calicos for the summer, cozy wools for the winter, and the scraps of velvet (from the rich Hobbits' clothes) would be made into decorative crazy quilts, like those in Victorian days.

Quilting bees are a sociable activity I could easily imagine taking place in the Shire. At first thought, one might wonder if they'd have time to sew, what with meal preparation taking up so much of their day, but since the families were large, I'm sure some of them were able to pursue other handcrafts. I can see the Hobbit women and girls sitting around a quilting frame, gossiping about Bilbo's quirks or whether Rosie wasn't going to look for another fellow soon, now that that Samwise chap had disappeared so long - and the fact that the armour Merry and Pippin wore must be horribly uncomfortable and heavy...

I'm sure Tolkien would have approved, as he was all for handcrafts instead of industrial production!

Lathriel 07-08-2005 06:45 PM

This message should be sent to the Shire. My granparents are becoming hooked on LOTR!!!!! :D

Lhunardawen 09-01-2005 02:26 AM

Is it just me, or did anybody else wonder why a lot more are being sent to Mordor than to the Shire? Is the world generally filled with things that belong to Mordor?

I admit to being quite an active poster in the "What do you assign to Mordor?" thread. Every simple annoying thing in my life I send to Mordor, when I find the time. But the other day, while I was contemplating whether or not to send a certain very Mordor-worthy something to the Black Land, a thought came to me so hard I could have touched it. ( :rolleyes: ) Isn't there something in bad things that could make them more appropriately sent to the Shire instead?

Just a thought.


Now that I'm trying to turn over a new leaf, I'd like to send parents and their children to the Shire. Perhaps the serene environment will give them the opportunity to understand each other.

Or maybe just Fea and Sauce. ;)

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