I would send ...
Intolerant people who would assign minor irritations to the most miserable, dangerous and evil place in the world without a moment's thought ... :p ;)
Happily, though, having assigned me to Mordor, it seems that people are now sending some of my favourite things there. So maybe it's not so bad after all. :D |
Yes, I find it somewhat affrighting
by the speed most blighting with which various among us Dead do find ourselves so led as to "swat a fly toward Mordor". But if Tolkien will deplore a Siamese Cat, are flies better than that? What else did Tolkien so deplore as to assign to Mordor? |
To be a bit more "real-life" and less "not-so-real-life" than my last contribution:
People who go up to you at work and ask "Do you work here?"
People who come in to the library at the same time of the same day, every week, and look at the same books, which are then left around to be picked up and reshelved for them to come in and look at in a week's time. Kids/teens who come in to the library for something like eight hours a week to go on the computers and play the SAME internet game each time. Get a life, people! No wonder obesity is on the rise. Internet use I can understand, eight hours I can understand (easily), but on the SAME game in the PUBLIC LIBRARY???? Lawnmowing: it's pointless. It never stops. ;) |
One no-brainer Britney spears.
Also I agree with Encaitare that AP exams should fit in nicely. Math should also go to Mordor. Its evil. Luckily this will be my last year ever taking math. Can't wait till I'm done. Nuclear bombs should go to Mordor and STAY there never to bother us again. Although we might just run out of room. peopl who snore should go to Mordor untill they stop. |
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I must correct you Saucepan Man I gave these exactly a moments thought no more no less :D ;) |
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I think I'm with Tolkien on motor transport. Like him, I drive because there's not always a lot of choice, and it would be restrictive if I could not do that. Cars are fine when you are in one, but when you are standing by the side of a stinky road they most definitely are not. On May Day we were halfway up a local hill (a mountain in English terms ;) ) and some kids roared past on scrambling bikes, ruining it for everyone else. I still can't get my head round why he didn't like Siamese cats though! That seems arbitrary so I too can be arbitrary. Today my pet peeve is going to be people who rush everywhere and tut when you take your time, e.g. getting in a huff when I chat to shop assistants while I pay, which I think is only being pleasant - but then I think Tolkien might agree with me on that one. :p |
Well I don't object to chatting to shop assistants per se but it can be maddening if the gossip for ages and you are debating whether you really have to get back to the office this instant or can hang on for another 5 minutes without incurring too much wrath. And I do find it baffling that people queue for half an hour to get their car tax and then look suprised to be asked for their MOT and Insurance docs and start rummaging in their handbags... but I wouldn't necessarily condemn tem to Mordor for their lack of forethought.......
Leylandii must go there though.... and slugs my poor hostas look like ... well very holey things indeed... Boromir maybe... ;) |
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Did Tolkien order more to Mordor? Yes and some not so blithely meant as the Siamese Cats he sent. First, some of his own side in war who succumbed to bullying evermore; And that blasted confraternity who offended Chris in the army. Modern life he also placed in Mordor with disgrace for its noisome, loathesome fume and stench, which daily, goodness it would drench with uninhabitable pestilence. Doggerel hath its uses for allowing abuses of poetic rhyme and sense. Time always giddily spent. |
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Today my thing for Mordor will be the nanny state, something else I think Tolkien would agree with. By this I mean the sanctimonious government initiatives which have led to almost constant news stories prying into people's personal lives and there is too much criticising and trying to modify our behaviour. I don't care what people give their children to eat, it's up to them frankly. I'm sure Tolkien would have agreed with this. The Shire was filled with happy Hobbits, smoking, drinking and eating to their hearts' content; they'd get roundly scolded for this today. ;) |
While on the whole I am for minimal government interference, people should be aware of what they are doing - and the government has responsibility for school (and hospital ) food... so many children are malnourished - my form group had 27/31 on free school meals, which should to my mind mean that a child is guaranteed one nutritious meal a day regardless of parental housekeeping skills. However the food offered was disgusting -I did try and persuade one of my group (aged 13 looked about 9..) that a lunch consiting entirely of jelly might not be the best option..... but I cannot say I blame him given the alternatives....
I think hobbit children despite their natural build and substantial food requirements were realtively healthy and active - and it was all natural and organic I bet. I am sure that Tolkien would not have approved of children so hyped on sugar and additives that they can't concentrate and so obese they can't move.... in the words of the "Now Show", children who just sit there and fizz..... As for smoking - smokers more than fund themselves with the tax they pay so as far as I am concerned they can puff away to your heart's content.... :D |
Mithalwen posted:
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I think the whole British public transport system and the way it is funded should go to Mordor. Lalwendë posted: Quote:
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There isn't actually, as far as I know laws against letting kids out - it is just that people are paranoid that they will be abducted, run over etc and councils etc are terrified of being sued... all very depressing really... little patches of Mordor everywhere.... People are very bad at realistically assessing risk.... and the media is partly to blame for that.
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More stuff to send shipping:
Chavs: I live in a place particularly full of them, they just play loud music on their mobiles, spit swear, loaf around annoy passers-by and vandalise things. I hate to classify people but when you're surrounded by them it becomes easier.
People who use the phrase "It's not rocket science": Well, rocket science isn't really that hard..... People who assume that I'm a fan of Star Trek just because I'm starting an Astrophysics degree. |
Um... what's a "Chav"?
One thing that can certainly be sent with no return... computer viruses. And spyware. They can rot there. |
I'm also going to Mordor over the vote. There's the Emily-Davison-in-front-of-the-King's-horse angle, and the oh-my-God-40%-that-could-have-mangled-Blair-has-been-wasted angle. Both seem pretty convincing to me. And the BNP are Uruk-Hai, so they're there in any case...
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I'm not going to appologise to anyone for insulting them because I know that none of you guys could be chavs (you're too nice and 'Tolkieny'). Perhapp's it is now apparent why these foul creatures should be assigned to Mordor? |
Oh, corsets should go too.
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Chav /chavettes here are a few examples.. but not sure of the US equivalent is trailer trash maybe? ... there are rich chavs too for whom money has not bought taste... ;)
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Chav /chavettes ... here are a few examples.. but not sure of the US equivalent is trailer trash maybe? ...
http://www.littlebritain.tv/characters_vicky.htm http://www.siglamag.com/blaggersguide/0412/Chavs.php http://www.chavscum.co.uk/celebrity.php |
Chav /chavettes ... Ug. I guess we Americans finally have something to feel sorry for you Brits about. Yeah, I noticed a few Americans on that scum site, but it still seems to be a Brit phenomenon (I hope I don't meet up with any of it when I go this Autumn). We have another name for the same thing, I suppose: Hollywood.
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By looking through the thread, a logical conclusion?
With a cheery misanthropic wave of my hand,
I assign people in general to The Black Land. (no offence guys, mais l'enfer c'est les autres.) :D |
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Oh well, I s'pose it might be fun, but maybe only for the sadistc portion of our kind. Just one question... If we were all in Mordor who would be enjoying a human free world? Other than animals (excluding the ones already assigned to Mordor), and tree's nearly everything has been assigned to Mordor. Maybe we already live in mordor with only a few glimpses of the star's shining through the cloud's after all. |
The opposite conclusion
With goodwill and collusion Would be to spare us all From where the shadows fall. These evils are subjective Or, one might say, elective Should you wish to smoke or drink Is it Mordor in a blink? The Siamese discerning Still doesn't deserve burning- Nay, even my Alsatians Should give no such reparations. Mordor was by the King purged For good reason-cease to urge Its all too quick repopulation Can only lead to detestation. |
Celeb, whomsoever finds his or herself in the position to assign something to Mordor should enjoy the human-free world. If anyone, I hope it's me! Or maybe if you look closely enough, I am comparing our own world to Mordor. How cynical of me.
Ang, very nice poem. You should have a rhyming face-off with Kransha. I think that would entertain the whole Barrowdowns. :smokin: |
People who cut Q's! Can't you wait your turn??
Pervs! get a life! Dentists...ugly vile evil...inhumane creatures! when you are waiting for the doctor to see you and they break for Coffee! cant the caffine wait?? I.B exams! Republicans,(i.e. George W. Bush) Bible thumpers cheerleaders and jocks VECTORS and ALGEBRA! ________ Digital Vaporizer |
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My Math teacher...
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Final exams Bad weather Mosquitoes |
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Therefore, I declare that all people who think Republicans should go to Mordor should go to Mordor themselves. :p |
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Oh, wait, it's mosquitoes. They do. |
To Mordor they will go...
Seven o'clock classes, especially if you live 2 hours away.
Upperclassmen who think freshies are "just freshies" so they don't have as much right. Who do they think they are? :mad: And budget cuts on my university. Oh, for crying out loud. As if we're not facility-challenged enough. Then again, there's always hope for all these to redeem themselves... |
I was going to post those sentiments after (I think it was the second) post, when someone said Communists should go to Mordor. Why are we talking about stuff like that? I thought this thread was for things like 7 o' clock classes (Amen, Lhuna!) and other such nonsense and fun.
Anywho, I assign mobile phones. Evil, evil things. On that I have no doubt JRRT would agree with me. Not that I'm living in the past or anything... |
Geometry -- I just completely bombed my final. :mad:
Flash -- Everything I do with that software comes out all messed up, no matter what I try. |
sorry about the comment i made before. i now realize it was politiclly incorrect and was quite rude. i would like to make a formal appology to all who were hurt by my comment... i would like to personally thank the phantom for coming to my aid.
one thing i know that should go to mordor is war. embarresed el ________ Design Host |
I agree with thongs. Especially when the girl who is wearing one is also wearing low pants, thus showing off her thong. SHUDDER
And if a guy wears one...that is just wrong. He should be sent straight to Barad-Dur |
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Here are a few of additions of my own. In the context of the modern world, it's not the Saurons that bother me as much as the Sarumans. There are too many of the latter running around making our lives miserable, and I would like to see them packed off to Mordor en masse. A few prime examples....
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My pleasure Lalwende! :D
I would also like to send the Wendy's guy a.k.a Wendy's unoficial spokesman to Mordor plus the Canadian Tire couple. (Just love what airfarce does with them) |
I suggest that all people who try to speak Old English when they can't be packed off straight to Mordor. It's not really hugely different from English, nor is it difficult to learn when to use "thou," "thy" and "thee." And please, learn your verbs. And why do I see people adding "-eth" to the ends of nouns? And...
*TGWBS mumbles on for a few more hours as less pedantic people leave one by one.* |
My dear friend, tghbs, thou speakest not of Old English nor its descendant, Middle English, but Jamesian English, otherwise named Shakespearian, for the speech of the great poet's plays and that found in holy scripture. Have a care, young sirrah, to know of what thou speakest before thou displayest thine opinions. ;)
And I do believe that all of my usages are grammitcally correct. |
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