Lord of the Office
 

What would it be like if the characters in LotR worked in the same office together? What would the co-worker dynamics be like?
Who would be in what position?

Arwen, the secretary, sitting at her desk. Intercom comes to life:
*Arwen, could you please bring the new Ring report?*
Arwen: If you want it, come and claim it!

Merry and Pippin would sooo have to be the office clowns. frodo could be the one that says "could you please be quiet, i trying to work" every now and then. Sam could be his assistant, and sauron would be the all hating big boss guy that nobody likes.

Gollum could be the sneaky janitor that takes everyone's stuff...

Everytime I hear the word "secretary", I think "Ghostbusters, whaddaya want?"
Maybe Eowyn would be like that?

Gollum with a mop, standing in the corner, retreating to his dark janitors closet, oh that would be so great.
And I could just imagine Sam...
Sam: do you need another coffee Mr. Frodo
Frodo: Sam, I already have six.
Sam: Well Mr. Frodo I just don't want to leave you thirsty

Yeah, i can just imagine it...
Pip and Merry are lounging in their cubicles. Suddenly...
Merry! Pippin! Get your butts in gear and start working!
P: What? Who said that?
Sauron your BOSS you idiot! I'm a giant eye I can see everything you do! DUH! Get to work!
And Gandalf would be the old tour guy showing newbies around the place.

Elrond would be the vicepresident or something, very busy and important

Legolas would be the computer/fax/printer/copier repair guy and all the women would pretend that something was broken so he would come fix it for them.
Either that or he would be the FedEx guy, and the women would be constantly ordering things so he would deliver it to them.

*sniggersnigger* Ghostbusters... *snigger*

Maybe the Guards of the Citadel from Minas Tirith would be the security guards. And, just wondering, what about Aragorn? What would he do?

Aragorn would be Aragorn, but thought of as the village idiot. Everyone is working, and suddenly, Aragorn gives a war cry and runs across the desks, ending in a tackling of the water cooler. Everyone looks up, tuts, and continues with work. [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]

Does anyone watch Spin City? If so:

Mike= Frodo
Paul= Sam
Carter= Legolas
Stuart= Merry
James= Pippin
Jenel(sp?)= Arwen
Nikki= Eowyn

[img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

[ February 12, 2003: Message edited by: eleanor_niphredil ]

Hope you like it! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Boromir: The disgruntled employee who, after waiting for an executive position has just been demoted in favor of a higher qualified new guy.

Aragorn: The new guy who's dating the boss's daughter and who everyone thinks should really lighten up on the cologne, though all in all a fairly likeable guy.

Arwen: The boss's sweet, perky daughter who's just gotten a summer job to get money to put her through her remaining year of college. (Hey let's face it- it's coming out of Daddy's wallet anyway.)

Legolas: The really snobby guy who works for customer relations and who knows how to tell if a particular wine is a 76 or 77 Napa Merlo. The kind that lots of the girls want to date but that turns them down. Still complete with flock of groupies.

~or~

The hippie, peace and granola guy who runs everyones copies down in office supplies. Still the kind girls get crushes on.

You Pick. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Eowyn: The take no **** personal assistant who's got a big attitude and a big crush on Aragorn.

Frodo: The little intern who's suddenly found himself in a situatuion he just can't handle.

Sam: Frodo's best friend since Frodo stopped a kid from stealing Sam's skateboard thirteen years ago. And now Frodo's really sorry for this random act of charity. Really sorry. ('I said eat the granola bar, buster! Eat it! And I won't take no for an answer! I'm making sure you get a healthy breakfast mister!)

Merry and Pippin: Indeed, the office clowns. They've been working in the office for only a month, and everone's already going insane.

Gimli: The annoying ex-military guy who stands by the coffee machines all day regailing innocent coffee sippers of his stories of the Great War of 1987 in Eastern Tibet. It doesn't matter to him that that never happened.

Gandalf: The office councilor who you can always turn to in your time of need. However, you're never sure if you can trust him with not leaking your problems to the vice-president during a casual poker game.

Saruman: The vice-president. Watch out.

Elrond: The guy in charge of the personnel, the supervisor or manager. He's a pretty get to the point type guy. 'Been known to like cut-to-the-chase lectures.

Grima: The VP's creepy personal assistant who stands at the water cooler making lame pick-up lines and gossiping. Occasionally bursts into tears in desperation. Go figure.

*Fingers faint on key-board* Well, now I shall grace you with my departure, and wish you enjoyment while reading.

[ February 13, 2003: Message edited by: Sadbh ]

Sadbh, that was great! I really enjoyed that one.

Perhaps Sam is Frodo's lacky, and refuses to leave his side even when Frodo goes home.

Frodo: Umm, Sam, don't you have your own home to go to?

Sam: I made a promise Mr. Frodo. 'Don't you lose him Samwise Gamgee.' And I don't mean to, even if I have to give up my own house, and wife, and family, and...

Very good, Sadbh! I like it a lot, you got it perfect! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] Just put Gollum in there as the creepy, I-shall-steal-all-your-stuff-and-rearrange-everything-so-you-can't-find-what-you-need-when-you-need-it janitor, and it'll be exact. [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

[ February 17, 2003: Message edited by: Sapphire_Flame ]

*Sings* 'Cause he's Nick Burns! Your company's computer guy!

*Looks at confused faces* Never seen it? Jimmy Fallon skit on Saturday Night Live. He plays the dorky guy that makes everyone feel less about him/herself because they are morons with the computer. They forget to turn on their computers and the like, but Nick Burns comes in and makes fun of them. He's constantly yelling, "MOOOOVE!" when they get things wrong, and not letting them work on the computers. He's also always making these computer jokes that even I don't get (although I'm a praying mantis with a computer, so I shouldn't talk). Very obnoxious character...movie-Haldir would do quite nicely in that position.

I can imagine Aragorn throwing a computer across the room, screaming, then storming out of his office, cursing about how the blasted thing made him lose his game of "Age of Empires", which he was not supposed to be playing on office time anyway.

And Pippin would always be accidentally downloading viruses sent to his computer, and spreading them throughout the whole office.

Legolas and Gimli would always be arguing (what makes this day different from all others?).

Imagine Gandalf giving a meeting? With an overhead projector connected to his computer with demonstrations?

Lord of the Office, kind of remided my of The Office, wonder who would be Ricky Javais [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

I like Sadbh's idea.

Sauron: The boss of the rival company, Mordor Inc.

Bill Ferny: A spy of Mordor Inc. One of the only people that likes Grima. He's the guy that everybody knows is a spy, but keeps him because he does his work.

Tom Bombadil: That werid guy that leaves in their companies basement. Whenever somebody asks about him, they just say, "Oh, Bombadil? He's been here since this place was built."

What exactly do the companies do anyway?

Ha! That's my favorite sketch! [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]

I wanted to encorperate the weird red-stapler guy from Office Space... for those of you who know what I'm talking about, do you think he's Gollum or what? Maybe Fatty Bolger, since I kind of envision them as looking the same, though I doubt Fatty has pyromania tendencies.

All of you who haven't ever seen it, go rent "Office Space." [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]

-'Vana

Yay! Three people like my idea! I feel all nice and glowy now. [img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] I also very much agree with you guys. The janitor profile for Gollum fits him to a T. (Tee, ti, how exactly are you supposed to write that? [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img])

[ February 17, 2003: Message edited by: Sadbh ]

I think it is a good idea to establish that there would be two rival companies. One run by Saron. The second run by...who? Elrond or Gandalf?

What do YOU think they would be producing?

(And Sadbh, I think just "T" is fine. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] Don't worry, be happy now.)

[ February 18, 2003: Message edited by: Airehiriel ]

Mordor Inc. run by Sauron with his V.P. Saruman, and his sniviling assitant Wormtongue. Product: Evil Rings to rule the world

Company of the Ring run by Gandalf with his V.P. Elrond. Product: Hero's to foil the plan of Sauron and destroy the Evil Rings to rule the world.

How about that? Any other suggestions for product or Personel?

hobbits & co: oh yes we work all day at the *insert name here * factory. We start at 8 and we don't get lunch 'till 3. we'd like to a break. for goodness sake. but Mr sauron says:
Saruman: U CAN'T heeeheheheeeheee!!!!

my apologies [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

Legolas walking down between the cubicles, carrying a heavy broken fax machine, wiping sweat off his forhead with a rag.
As he walks by, all the women sitting and working, rise up, look over, and start fanting because of how hot he is.
Just a thought... [img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img]

I could so think of Frodo as the young intern, or how about the guy who is only doing the job because his father wanted him to go into the business. So he hates it, but he sticks with it to complete about a year there, and then moves on to another job, just to make his father proud.

Ooh, DaughterofVana, you beat me to it! I was thinking "Lord of the Office Space."

Pippin: Hang on, Frodo - you don't come in to work, you have a complete mental breakdown on the way to Mordor, you claim the friggin' Ring for your own - and you're not even being called a "Fool of a Baggins"?

Frodo: Actually, I'm getting to go the Undying Lands.

OK, only works if you've seen it...oh well...