The orcs at the back
 

This is something that's been on my mind lately:

At Helm's Deep, there are 10,000 orcs attacking the fortress, but surely not all of them can be up and attacking the wall at the same time. What are the ones at the back doing? Playing poker? Let's hear some ideas people!!! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

i bet they were taking to time to refine themselves, reading philosopy, practicing Quenya, and learing to yell in harmony ( no way an orc can sing)

or...

Sleeping, pigging out, gambling, any other useless things they could think of

[ August 07, 2003: Message edited by: Maylin ]

Probably dreaming 'bout how they might change the course of the battle, and if they would be honoured beyond all other orcs if they played a major part in winning. (Do Orcs even think like that?!?) Or we could just say they were playing monopoly (" Hey, I just passed go, you non murderer! give me 200!" " Dont insult me! Non murderer indeed!"

Dreaming about the girl they left behind, of course...:: shudder:: Nightmares. [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img]
Peace

trading gossip [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]

watching the great battle and betting on who's going to kill who.

'I bet Orc number 3,892 is going to kill Eorlinga number 109!' [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

'No way, Orc 3,892 isn't that good. I bet it'll be Orc 973 to take Eorlinga 109.'

[img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] Keep it up, these are brilliant!!! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Nah, they'd be catching up on they're school work. I mean, imagine all those orks working for Saruman to get money to finish their college degrees.

And don't forget about writing letters to their moms back home. Sniff....

Punch and Judy. Or Richard and Judy for those with a portable TV.

they are taking relaxing mud baths or just knitting nice, warm mufflers, don't you think?

Hacking at each other. They're orcs for the sake of Pete!

They're actually having a nice, civilized game of chess. [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

Working out the sum of [The amount of Eorlings] times [amount of orcs] divided by pie, added to the amount of horses... etc. All without the help of a calculator. Not all orcs are idiots, you know! [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

Discussing the new line of L'Oreal hair conditioners and how Legolas is SO much uglier than Uruk no. 1235. And of course, what came before: the chicken or the egg [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

Corny, I know [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

engaging in scholarly debates over whether or not Balrogs have wings

lol these are so funny!
that's great!

I think they would be drinking tea and eating crumpets(sp?) and disscussing the weather,catching up on the latest gossip, and critiquing Legolas' outfit.

perhaps they engage in debates about how Sauron can use the Clear-Eyes without any arms...much less hands.. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

[img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] These are great!!!

Huh. Maybe since they're Saruman's orcs, they could be trying to figure out how he keeps his robes that white with all that mud that he walks through all the time (you know, like in the pits).

Oh, and elfearz1, Welcome to the Downs!!! Enjoy being dead. [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]

I think they'd be painting their nails. Hot pink of course! lol thanks sapphire!

[ June 30, 2003: Message edited by: elfearz1 ]

the orcs in back? thw Ocs in back are probably having themselves a few nice games of TTT on their portable Tvs hehe

(seriously the orcs in back were probably archers and or siege operators

Hehehehe!
They're probably all staring at Uruk No 4,029 (Bortez)'s Urukesses of the Month calendar, all drooling over the half Nazgúl one! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

OR

THey're probably cheering like at a soccer match, going "FOUL" when a ladder is knocked down, and "RED CARD" when an Eorling kills some Orcs.

Hey!
They could also be constructing a site called "From the Battlefront.......or back, what the Battle of Helm's Deep was REALLY like!" on Uruk No 9,999 (Notlarztz)'s new Dell PC with Windows XP. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

See ya!
Namarié!
From
Elróthiel, the Elven Goddess of Hilariosity and Laughter!

Eh, they probably got bored and ate each other. [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]

Whistling 'Teddybears' picnic' of course!

(if you go down to the woods today, you're sure of a big surprise......) [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

Nice ones, Elróthiel! [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

These are brilliant, keep it up! (I really can't believe that so many people have replied to my thread [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] )

Abedithon le! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Would arrows and seige engineers reach that far?

They would be fighting Huorns.

Berfore the Huorns came they would be sitting down in chairs at tables trying to invent things like refriderators so they wouldn't have to eat "maggotty bread for three stinkin' days."

I suck at this

Don't feel bad, we all have our days.

In fact, I'm experiencing similar difficulties myself...

Heh, I really can't believe that so many people have replied to this thread! How ridiculous.

However, I believe they would be fighting one another, since they couldn't get at anyone else. I mean, they're programmed for battle!

Or maybe they're wondering why it is that the orcs in front of them keep keeling over. At least, the ones who are just out of bow range would be.

Kates Frodo Temp: Ha ha ha. [img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img]

I think they'd be posting on the downs bwahahahahahhahaa [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]


... well I thought it was funny

[ July 17, 2003: Message edited by: elfearz1 ]

The Uruks at the back would be practicing their irish dancing for their recital on the weekend!

• Talking about the weather
• Playing cards
• Whinging
• Playing mournful guitar and singing 'Why are we waiting?'
• Listening to the football on somebody's mini radio (they weren't cheering because of the attack, it was a goal against Manchester United)

[ July 24, 2003: Message edited by: Airerûthiel ]

Man U??? they don't support Man U...they support liverpool for pete's sake!

Anyway they aren't into that crude physical stuff. Uruk-Hai are civilised! They listen to Bach and do cross-stitch.

This is wonderfully amusing! Kate's Frodo Temp: sublime there: "just out of bow range!" [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Perhaps they would be loading catapults with heavy artillery (other Orcs!).
Orc 1 to Orc 2: "Hey Brokenek! Come here!"
Orc2 to Orc 1: "My name's not Brokenek!"
Orc 1 to Orc 2 (loads Orc 2 onto catapult): "It will be!"

OK, not hilarious, but the best I can come up with!

Cheers,
Lyta

Osse, I said a goal against Man Utd!Of course Orcs support Liverpool - did you think they have no taste?!

They were probably calling the orcs in the front on their cell phones and asking how the battle was going.

How intelligent do you take orcs to be? They were probably gormlessly standing there. Or else pushing forward.

They were gossip about Saruman's love life.
Orc 1: Did you hear that he was dating Arwen behind Aragorn's back?
Orc 2: No! That can't be true!
Orc 1: Is to, I read it in People.

Since when do orcs read People? They're orcs, they would have to read Orc, or something like that.

All right, I'm sorry, that was way lame. *hits head on wall* I'm done now.

HI! Thanks for the compliment Sapphire Flame!
Ya want some more?
Here they are!

They were probably playing The Sims Unleashed on Notlartz's Dell, and downloading Orc and Uruk skins off the Internet so they could make a sort of Sim Virtual Battle! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

OR!

They could all be attempting to build a couch out of random dead Eorlingas so they could sit comfortably while watching Eastenders!

They could ALSO be discussing what the world would be like in a few thousand years (aka Now), and freakily getting it right:
Uruk No 2,197 (Squarkz): Hmmm, well -I- think that all the countries will be split up into all little ones, and all the maidens will wear trousers!

Uruk No 3,333 (Quartz): Yes, maybe! BUT! There will also be really cool weapons used to kill people!

Squarkz: Yea! And one of the countries will be really cool, and all the rest apart from a rare few will be REALLY BORING!

Quartz: What do you think they'll be called?

Squartz: I dunno brother. Something really weird. Like........England, and Scotland. Haha! The Lands of Eng and Scot! Silly future people!


Well! That's it! Hope you liked them! I've just recently been to Japan, and since I've been back, England has become SO BORING!! [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img]
I miss my friends, I miss the family I stayed with, and more specifically, I miss the really hot 19 year old dude in that family..............
See y'all!
Namarié!
From
Elróthiel, the Insane Elven Goddess of Hilariosity and Laughter!