[Bêthberry]

*huffing and puffing and favouring left hip*

Huh. All these steps down to the nether regions of the Barrow Downs. I thought I would never make it, what with my arthritis, my rheumatism, my gout, my--oh, wait a minute. This isn't the RPG fiction forum. Well, yes *clears throat and assumes normal voice*

I was half expecting to be the eldest but find I am not. (Nods respectfully to her elders, pio, Child, Selmo, Esty? ) Nor am I of standing as the longest-read. (Nods to Mithadan, Helen, Cuthalion, ainur and the Elders). My history of reading Tolkien somewhat resembles that of Rimbaud and Mr. Underhill--not necessarily in one fell swoop.

Back in second year of university (we don't call it 'college' up here), I read the trilogy and The Hobbit, sandwiching them between such massive eye-strains as Clarissa, The History of Tom Jones, The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman, Vanity Fair, Middlemarch, Dombey and Son and Great Expectations, The Fairie Queen, histories of Europe and of Canada from then till now, and Everyman and other medieval morality plays. (I'm trying to suggest that I nearly went blind reading that year and still read Tolkien.) So, as I was learning about western history's wars and narratives I was reading Tolkien's battles and mythology. But the reading was pure enjoyment and entertainment and true appreciation was swamped by eyestrain and carpal tunnel syndrome.

In later studies, I came upon academic Tolkien, his work in Old and Middle English, and then found On Fairy Stories. I was floored--truly knocked off my feet--by his perception, by his being able to get inside the narrative structure of fantasy in so perceptive a way. I remain to this day in awe of his intelligence and think far more highly of him than of any subsequent theorist in studies of narrative. I might have reread LOTR at this time and certainly debated the inclusion of The Hobbit in children's literature with friends. This was back in days when children's literature was not academically respectable. We didn't give a hoot for that.

Over a year ago I reread TH as background for a Tolkien RP with Gandalf the Grey and that led me on to LOTR again. Last November I reread it by my mother's hospital bedside as she underwent four weeks of excruciatingly painful tests and a horrifyingly rapid physical decline. About the same time that Frodo and Bilbo were sailing west with Galadriel and Gandalf, she was told to prepare for her own journey. I cannot begin to describe how this has affected my reading of Tolkien except to say with Child that it has assumed an astonishingly spiritual quality. I am only beginning to appreciate Tolkien's claim that he was writing about death. This past summer I was finally able to appreciate The Silm instead of viewing it piecemeal as encyclopedic sections.

So, what I would ask of all of you is: How has your reading or understanding of Tolkien changed or developed in your 18+ years of reading him?

Bethberry

PS. See--all those steps didn't wind me at all. [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

[ September 24, 2002: Message edited by: Bethberry ]