Elrond sits down on his pouffy couch in Rivendell, glad to relax now that that pesky Fellowship is gone. I mean, really. Legolas trying all his hiar care products, and Boromir and Aragorn fighting over Arwen... it can really wear you out.
*turns on T.V.*
"Today, on Fashion Spy..."
Elrond: My favourite show!
"...you will be seeing the Fashion Greats, and the Fashion Mistakes."
*Elrond is aborbsed.*
"Here is today's Fashion Greats. We planted a secret camera at the Council of Elrond to get the footage you see here."
*Elrond sits straight up*
Elrond: That's my council! I'm on T.V.! They think I'm a fashion great!
"If you look to the corner, you'll see him. His blond hair is perfectly balanced by his silver robes..."
*Announcer blahs on and on about how great this guy is, Elrond acts very smug, convinced its him*
"And the name of our Fashion Great is..."
Elrond: Me! It's me! Elrond!
"...Legolas!"
*Elrond too shocked to do anything.Just sits there gaping.*
"Now, on his opposite is our fashion mistake. Those robes are totally second age, and I think I can still see battle smears from the Last Alliance!.."
*Announcer blahs on and on about how bad this guy is. then:*
"...and this poor unfortunate soul's name is... Elrond!"
*Elrond bursts into tears*
Elrond: Nooot faair! I'm w-w-way prettier than L-l-legolas! I'm gonna take a ba-a-ath!
*retreats sniffing to his bathroom, where we can soon hear him talking to his rubber ducky and singing.*
Elrond: ducky, everyone's so mean to me! *sniff*
Ducky: quack squeak.
Elrond: You really think so?
Ducky: squeak squeakity quack.
Elrond: Oh, me too! Let's elope! I'm so over Celebrian!
Ducky: Cluck squeak quackity.
"Next week on the Desperate and Deranged..."
p.s.: I do not in anyway mean offence to Elrond. Elrond is cool. This is stuff they'd NEVER say, remember?
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