[Rynoah, the Overly-Happy]

"Grease, grease
How my hair is greasy!
See, I look so sleazy!
No one can deny my stench is deadly!
Oh, how my hair is greasy!
Makes my pony sneeze-y
Someone draw a bath so I can bathe!"

*end*

... okay, those are some really disturbing images running through my head. Someone get me some bleach, I need to clean my brain. [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

****

The Fellowship is created in Rivendell consisting of: two hobbits (for time's sake, they cut out Merry and Pippin), Gandalf the wisey-type old fart wizard with a bunch of sparkles that always accompany him wherever he goes, Aragorn the brooding, warrior/hero type person, Legolas the ever-happy and light-hearted elf (the small, bouncy kind), Gimli the comically grumpy and stupid dwarf and Boromir the exaggerated "Mary Sue" of the group, complete with shady past and parent issues. They set off for Mordor to destroy, not the Ring, but a jewelry box that should NEVER be opened. No one knows what this box contains, but it must be very bad and dangerous because the Bad Lord Sauron (who is a creature with an eye bigger than his entire body and a mouth to go with it, just because a floating eye and mouth are too scary) made it by mixing various different bad things together. However, Boromir the Mary Sue is lead to believe it contains a way to help make everything right by a mischeivous sprite named Gollum that stalks the Fellowship the entire way, so Boromir tries to take the box from Frodo. In his attempt to do so, the Fellowship catch him and they berate him for it, forcing him to burst into a tragic ballad about his horrible life. He then leaves the Fellowship in the midst of an encounter with a bunch of cute orcs (because you can't have killing in this Disney movie!). Frodo and Sam are separated from the Fellowship and are forced to continue on their own way to Mordor, with Gollum following. It's a whole "oooh, spooky stalker is following you" scene, complete with ominous music and firtive glances of glowing yellow eyes in the shade of rocks and bushes. Finally, Sam whirls around in a heroic display and lassoes Gollum with some rope. The little sprite bursts into tears and sobs out an entire history of HIS horrible life and Frodo finds a moral to it all. Relieved that someone could make something positive out of his drab existence, Gollum agrees to help them, so he leads them to Mount Doom and the One Jewelry Box is destroyed in a bunch of fireworks and amazing beautiful displays. Suddenly, the two hobbits and Gollum find themselves amidst a party recieving praise and cheers. Everyone reacts with disdain towards Gollum until Frodo berates them for leaving him out just because he stinks, can't speak coherently and looks like someing a piece of roadkill would fall in love with. We get a whole piece of why friends are important and differences in appearance aren't and then the movie ends with everyone singing a chorus of the main song whilst Gandalf sets off fireworks.