Lanaey had stayed in the back of the council, simply observing those around her without contributing anything. She had talked enough last night and didn't feel like talking at all. Glancing around she looked at the anticipatory faces and the reserved ones. Laurel looked different from last night, as if she had given something up or had a confirmation. Maybe a mixture of the two or neither of them. Lanaey shrugged off her indifference and shifted her position as the humans and elf spoke their pieces. Human's were so impatient sometimes. Lanaey decided that it must come from their youth.
Laurel seemed exceptionally worried about the farmers and such who wouldn't head their warning to go to safety. Lanaey thought that their leader was exceptionally emotional, but that was understandable. She was a young human who was fighting for her home and the life that was all she knew in this world. She could even be losing her friends and family at this very moment to the raiders, who seemed to be expert fighters capable of anything. Lanaey watched Laurel's back as she exited the meeting. Laurel was supressing many emotions as she left them all to get ready for the upcoming trek and not all of those emotions were evoked from this meeting.
Pivoting on her right foot, Lanaey turned and headed to her nearby little camp, gathering up everything. She hadn't been able to do her full excercises that morning, but that was to be expected. She had been able to get in the basic stretching ones, and figured that those would be the only ones she would be able to do for awhile. She had been constricted in her excercises by company campaigns before and it didn't really phase her.
"Heya Drass, now we ride some more," Lanaey spoke quietly in her horses ear. Drass stamped her foot, eager to be off, which brought a slight smile to the old elf's mouth. Drass always seemed ready for anything. Moving around her camp Lanaey gathered up all her belongings that weren't already packed away. She re-checked all her weapons and grabbed her two slender sticks that she hadn't already put in her hair. Twisting it up in two simple motions, the sticks were in place and now so was her long hair. Riding and fighting without worrying about simple little things like loose hair were good comforts in life. Gathering Drass' reigns she led her horse to where they were departing.
Looking about her Lanaey could feel the pull again. It was a pull to go outside of herself, and she resisted it with much effort. It felt as if her soul wanted to escape her corporeal being, but the mind fought it. Going still Lanaey had to literaly stop everything she was doing to focus soley on taking control of herself. As if grasping hold of something, she came almost violently back to herself. Tremoring slightly she gripped Drass' reigns and then the horse itself for support. Acting as if she were simply stroking Drass' neck Lanaey looked around to see if anyone had caught her in that moment of pure weakness. There were some people nearby, but none noticably looking at her. That quick survey satisfied Lanaey as she turned inward again to figure out what had just happened to her.
I've been drifting further and further as each night passes. I've never lost control of myself before though. The previous night Lanaey had blamed her sense of detachment on the environment around her, but now she knew it was much more serious and personal. It's inside of me . . . Suddenly Lanaey was frightened, this was something completely foreign to her, no emotion she had ever known before. Gathering every ounce of will power and strength that she had, Lanaey brought herself under control and sealed away the offending sense inside of her.
Petting Drass to quite the beasts fear for it's master, Lanaey looked out at the landscape before her.
[ March 28, 2003: Message edited by: Kryssal ]
[ March 29, 2003: Message edited by: Kryssal ]
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