The sun-kissed waves scampered across the sands of the Tol Erasurëa Time Share Casino and Resort, as Birdie started on her second Tom Bomb-adillo of the day. She blew a kiss at her favorite cabana Elf, and sighed as Glorfindel rubbed athelas oil between her shoulder blades.
“Oh, Glorie, you do have that Elven magic, don’t you?” Birdie moaned with pleasure, and plucking the candied Elanor from the drink, placed it between her lips and offered it to her favorite Firstborn masseur.
The moment was broken though, but the sound of oversized feet shuffling through the loose drifts of golden sand. A small, dejected looking figure wearing a pillbox hat and short-waisted, double breasted jacket appeared before the skin-changer.
“Well, what is it Frodo?” Birdie asked with ill-concealed impatience.
“Yeth“ huffed Glorfindel, “Can’t you see that Miz Birdie is very busy at the mometh?“
“Palan-Gram for Miss Birdie” Frodo intoned in a lifeless voice.
Birdie snatched the folded vellum from the Hobbit and quickly ripped it open. Quickly scanning the gist of the missive (and ignoring the none-too-subtle reminder from Mith that she needed to post the next installment in the “Shadow of the Star” thread) Birdie squealed with delight and held the Palan-Gram out to the assembled Fair Folk For Hire.
“Look, Nerdy! Glorie! I’ve been awarded a Downie! Oh, my Internet fan base has given me their very highest honor!”
Glorfindel and Nerdanel clapped their immortal hands together in glee, crying “Ai! Ai! A Downie! How wonderful, Mith Birdie.” Then Glorfindel, spying the erstwhile Ringbearer staring at his feet, aimed a quick kick at the listless perian. “Well? Do your ‘Happy Hobbith Dance’ for Mith Birdie. She has been awarded a ‘Downie’!”
Frodo did a random, shuffling step while swinging his arms, as he thought back in horror to the day the grey rain-curtain had rolled back, and he had first beheld the rotted, wooden dock, and the rough-hewn sign stating “The Work Will Heal“.
As the plucky Harfoot attempted a ’shuffle-ball-change‘ he cursed (not for the last time) the day he agreed to turn his Shire passport over to Gandalf “for safe keeping.”
“But we’ll get it back. Yesssss, we will. Then we’ll make them ALL sorry!“
Meanwhile, Birdie tapped the Palan-Gram against her lips, as she counted out the days it had taken it to arrive at Tol Erasurëa. “Why, the award ceremonies are tonight! I must leave for the Barrow Downs now, if I am not to disappoint my loyal RPG worshippers."
“But Mith Birdie. If you leave now, you will mith your archery lethons. And you know how much you love plucking your lithle bow and arrowths.“
“Oh, Glorie, you do know me so well…”
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Dear Diamond stop
Impossible to arrive in time stop
Please give my most sincere regrets to my fellow Downers stop
Hugs and Kisses, Birdie end
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