[Mithadan]

Captain Gravlox, who possessed a bit more wit than most Orcs, undertood that his position as head of security involved more than simply keeping the peace. Thus, as the audience murmured in shock, he swept up a fallen clipboard and a golden trophy and stepped out to the podium. Ignoring the fact that the average Orc has a deep-rooted fear of public speaking, he addressed the audience.

"Our next Downie Award pays homage to a valued trait of Barrow-Downs' RPGs; their commitment to authenticity. We strive to have our RPGs mirror the works of our favorite author as closely as possible. Thus, we present the Canon Award for the RPG Most Faithful to the Spirit of Tolkien. And the winner is...Estelyn Telcontar for 'The Revenge of the Entish Bow'!"

As Led Zeppelin's 'Whole Lotta Love' begins to play, the spotlights search through the audience and come to rest on a tall woman standing in the rear of the auditorium signing autographs. She seems surprised and raises a hand to her chest. Moi? Then she steped forward towards the stage throwing kisses to all and sundry.

She fairly raced up the steps and strode forcefully to the podium where she snatched the trophy from the Orc's claws and raised it triumphantly in the air. "You like me, you really like me," she cried. "Oh, this is such a shock. I must begin by thanking all the little people who made this possible...but I'm so bad at recalling the names of little people. Let's see... There was the Dwarf with the Dragon, Booboowarren. Then there was that nasty animal person, Thirdbland, and the one who did all those cameos, Deathfairy."

She took a deep breath and thought hard. "Who else? Oh yes, the one who played the two half-Elves, Pieman18. And of course there was that darling Arrowbite whose character was in love with me. And Potter of Baby Ruth, whose character was in love with me. And also Jimbob, whose character was in love with me. Oh, and Iffyplan, whose funny little Orc character was in love with me. Oh thank you, everyone!"