[Ainaserkewen]

“To present The Gonzo Award for the Moderator Most Likely to Go Postal and Wipe Out the Population of an Inn, Head of the MAMI (Mothers Against Magical Influence), feminist, and leader of the BAEB (Ban All Evil Books) campaign…
Daphne Benelli!!!”
(Insert splattered applause)(Ainaserkewen was going to present the award, but disappeared suddenly beforehand, Veanca could not be found either, so they found the nearest person and used her.)
A very strict and stiff woman walks up to the podium. She is wearing a crisp plain white blouse and a very modest length grey skirt with black flats. Her hair is in a tight low bun, and she wears glasses.
She sets her laptop on the podium, and begins her speech.
“Fist and foremost, I would like to express my disgusted disappointment in each and every one of you! Your beloved author of the evil devil books you love so much is corrupting this world’s children to evil! Magic! Dragons! Elves! Shame on you all!”
Stunned silence fills the room. There is no clapping or any noise except the lone cough far away.
“MAMI and the BAEB will be paying you all a little visit very soon!”
Jaws dropped and a hobbit in the back starts to cry. Everyone is speechless, too horrified that there ever was such a person, to be angry. Who let this bozo in anyway!!!
“But getting on with things…” She continued. “The Gonzo Award for the Moderator Most Likely to Go Postal and Wipe Out the Population of an Inn, whom the winner has been enjoying Tolkien’s books for over 35 years, goes to…”
She opened the envelope slowly for effect. There was a drum roll and a trumpet fanfare.
“Before I tell you, know that you are all aiding with Satan’s plan’s for conquest.
The winner is…The Child of the 7th age, Cami Goodchild!!!”
Tremendous applause erupts. People are standing up and clapping, whistling and hooting.
Over the din, the pit band starts to play an odd Canadian song that Ainaserkewen had picked out. A new group called “The Arrogant Worms” who were known to write very unusual stuff.

It’s great to be a nerd,
It’s great to be a nerd,
The only light we ever see
Is from our monitor,
We hate watching sports, cause we reading Carl Seggen,
But we’d watch the Olympics if they played “Dungeons and Dragons”
“I’m a hobbit!!!” Someone cried.
It’s great to be a nerd,
It’s great to be a nerd,
We think Tolkien was a genius
And Shakespeare was a turd!

People liked the song, but it was really weird.
Cami laughed good-naturedly along with it anyway.