Being slain is the parting of the soul from the body, the line of connection between the two being "snipped" so to speak.
Whether an elf was impaled with a sword or served a poisoned drink, he is still slain by the hands of another.
BTW, I was under the impression that when I read the books, Arwern, after the death of her beloved Aragorn, went into the west to Valinor.
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Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens... -The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers: Book 2, Chapter 3)
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