As to the subject of Arehdil herself . . .the first person not guilty of doing something minorly selfish, raise your right hand now.
Yeah, that's what I thought. As has been pointed out, it's true that if she'd stayed behind in Gondolin like a good little girl, Gondolin wouldn't have fallen. Then again, if Eol hadn't randomly kidnapped a passing lovely elf woman--go back and read that passage again, it was captivation and confinement--Gondolin also would have fallen. If Turgon had been smart enough to leave the city when advised, Gondolin wouldn't have fallen. If Gondolin had never been built, Gondolin wouldn't have fallen. If Eol hadn't been so sickly, possessively stubborn, Gondolin wouldn't have fallen. If Maeglin hadn't had a rather incestuous interest in his cousin, Gondolin wouldn't have fallen. If Idril hadn't fallen for Tuor, Gondolin wouldn't have fallen.
And I'm sure that if someone's great-great-great-grandfather hadn't swatted a malaria-bearing mosquito, then someone wouldn't have died and . . .you see where I'm going with this.
Lush, I think your friend has some pretty unrealistic ideas of women if he thinks we don't have just as much impulse to wander, see, explore and not be cooped up in one place as men do. As for a woman's "place" . . .I do have issues with Tolkien's portrayal of taht, but I'm also well aware of the point of view, timewise, religionwise and time-in-storywise that he was writing from, so I deal.
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