This is a great thread. And a touching one at that.
For me, the books have both changed with me and changed me. The first time I remember having LotR read to me was when I was about 3 years old and living in India. I thought that it was better than anything I'd ever heard. Better than the Ramayana (which had been my fixation at the time), better even than mother's cooking. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
When I lived in a place where Americans aren't welcome, the books became my escape. I still didn't have the reading skills to read them on my own, so my brother would read them to me. I equated him with Aragorn- calm, strong, and protecting.
When I finally did start reading them for myself, it was on the plane to America. I realized then that the book was a journey, as my life was (eh...<u>is</u>, I've been hanging around here too much) a journey. I could identify with new lands, new experiences.
After that, I remember reading them just for fun and for once taking them at face value- a great story about Elves and little Hobbit whatsits and talking trees.
Then things happened, tough times ensued, and I grounded myself on the firmness of Gimli. Gimli had always been a rock of a character to me, always there, always willing, always a little tough on you but in a nice way.
When my brother joined the military, I again turned to the books for a foundation. I found it in Mirkwood's favorite elf, Legolas. I took his abilities and made them mine. I took his character and found pieces of it in my own life.
A year after that, my brother went to war. That's when I saw the war side of the story. That's when I was able to put my own feelings into the different characters are they know war rages through their lands, against their kin.
But the books have also changed me. They opened my eyes a little further each time, and I was- and am- always surprised at what that little opening can let in.
I won't even get into the Silmarillion. This post is already going on too long. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
Commenting on Arwen Melian's post,
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... But seriously...if this is truly an escapist fantasy....I would rather have Middle Earth then the real world ...
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The thing that (subconsciously at least) appeals to so many of us, I think, is the very fact that almost any situation under the sun is also under Middle-Earth's sun. If your wife is annoying you, you can find Aule outsmarting her with a choice comment that his Dwarves will still need wood. If you leave home, you can find that in any one of the Fellowship and in Bilbo in the Hobbit. The difference between Middle-Earth and our own reality, though, is that in Middle-Earth, you can read ahead to make sure verything comes out alright. [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]