[ElanorGamgee]

Well, my death story is a bit *ahem* embarrassing, you see. A bit of a mix up on my part; in fact, you might call it a comedy of errors…except that comedies don’t end in death, normally. But I digress.

You see, I was on the wrong side of the Brandywine, for one thing. But that’s perfectly normal, because I live on the outskirts of Bree, and queer folk live on the western side of the Brandywine, as everyone knows. No, I was on the wrong side because my dratted relatives live on the opposite. I don’t understand why cousin Daffodil married that ridiculous Proudfoot and agreed to live among such odd folk, but I couldn’t very well refuse an invitation to her forty-first birthday party, now, could I? So I packed a few things and set off on the path to Hobbiton.

Now, normally I wear my glasses when I drive the wagon anywhere, as it is a responsible thing to do and I consider myself as good a hobbit as any. However, I forgot the things in my befuddled state of mind and was well down the road before I realized my pony looked remarkably like a large furry sofa. But not one to allow small shortcomings to deter me, I drove on, even urging poor Teddy to trot faster. It was around this time that the beast must have taken the left rather than right turn at the fork in the road, and therein lies the fatal mistake.

Evening neared, and the blurred objects before me began to melt together into darkness. The country was hilly, and the hills seemed to have points jutting from the tops. To my imperfect eyes, they looked as if they could be some manner of dwellings, and, well, folk outside Bree are known for being awful strange. Despite his stubbornness, I urged Teddy toward the nearest one.

I felt the air chill and snapped the reins, but the pony would not budge. Cursing the creature, I hopped out of the wagon to lead him by the reins. Teddy had other plans; the insolent beast bolted the moment my foot touched the grass. With nowhere to go but forward, I approached the top of the hill.

A dark figure emerged. My heart ought to have leapt for joy, but it ended up in my mouth instead. I staggered forward, wishing to turn, but fixed to my destination. A thin streak of an arm reached forward and beckoned icily. I kept moving closer and closer as the figure grew larger in my sight, until the darkness of the robes enveloped my sight. Then I woke up to discover myself wearing the most outrageous costume jewelry in the company of you good people. My, folk outside Bree certainly are strange, and no mistake!