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Jackson would have had to have spent a fair bit of movie time showing the relationship between Merry and Theoden for the book version farewell to have worked. He could not afford time wise to do this, (or perhaps he wanted more screen time for a female) so he subsituted the scenes building up Merry and Theoden's relationship, and built up Theoden's and Eowyn's instead.
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Although if pictures don't lie, it appears that Merry offers his service to Theoden at Edoras:
surely Jackson has incorperated some of their relationship in as this is happening (although it'd have to be in the EE, of course). So I think we'll see more of the Merry/King Theoden relationship in the RotK EE, but unfortunatly, I don't think that we'll see the Merry/King Theoden farewell scene because of the Theatrical release of RotK. From what I remember the shots aren't set up correctly to introduce the farewell scene in the EE

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