Fea walks into the room with a dignified saunter, causing an immediate hush. The Cheeky Brits stop their cheeking, the Dorky Dorks stop their researching, the Angsty teens quit wallowing in self-pity, and everyone else simply stops. The only motion is that of Eomer of the Rohirrim carefully sipping a cup of tea, pinky outstretched, as he sits beside the fire in a pink argyle skirt... er... kilt. Fea looks around.
"Behold! Yet another King of the World Barrowdowner hath joined your ranks. All shalt love me and despair."
After several shocked seconds, an uproar begins. The Brits poke Fea with their well-muscled pinkies, shouting Cockney obscenities that nobody but themselves understand. The Nerds quickly start looking up all the ways to oust a monarch, and the Angsty teens begin muttering rebelliously. Fea looks nervous.
"You misunderstood me, let me explain!" she shouts over the noise, "You shall love me because I shall provide you with all the supplies you need! The Brits shall get a lifetime supply of PG Tips (the best tea in the world, Fea's alter-ego adds smugly), and the Nerds shall recieve... coffee. Caffiene all around! As for the desparation... I was letting my nerdy side poke through."
As Fea's queenly voice cuts through the sound, silence takes over once again.
"What about whipped cream?" shouts one of the battlers.
"Thou shalt receiveth whipped cream, and this war shall lasteth through eternity, but there shalt be no killing. As thou mayest already know, we are already dead!"
Cheers are heard through the room, as Fea turns on her heel and marches back out the door through which she entered...
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