Excellent thread topic,
Fordim. However, I must disagree with you on a few points. (I seem to be doing this a lot lately--I promise, I'm not following you around the Downs looking for things to disagree with!)
First, regarding Eowyn: You suggest that at the end of the story she "goes back" on her previous feminist stance. To be a feminist, though, does not mean to wish to live as a man.
Mr. Underhill said it very well:
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Female empowerment and marriage are not mutually exclusive.
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You are quite right to point out that Eowyn has some great lines lamenting her inequality, but the warrior role she temporarily assumes can be just as much of a cage as her earlier traditional role. What she wants, what will empower her, is choices. She freely chooses to marry Faramir; that is just as important a choice as riding into battle. The point, I think, is that had she stayed in Rohan marriage would have been pressed on her. She would not have had the option of refusing, though she might have had her choice of suitors (which makes me wonder--do we know anything about the courtship customs of the Rohirrim?).
It's true that men don't seem to have complete freedom of choice, either (I don't recall any stay-at-home dads in LOtR, for example), but they certainly have more choices than the women do. Frodo chooses to bear the Ring, Boromir chooses to travel with the Fellowship, etc.
Next. regarding Shelob, you said that she possesses
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feminine power that does not check itself, and must be checked by men.
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But as you said yourself, Shelob's power could not have been destroyed without the light given by Galadriel. I think that it matters very little who was bearing the light, but it is very significant that when Sam unveils it he invokes Elbereth. Shelob's power is not really checked by Sam, but by the Phial of Galadriel and the name of Elbereth.
I really like the comparison of Arwen to Penelope. It invites another--three weavers=the Fates?
Mithalwen, thanks for bringing up Ioreth. I also think she gets a bad rap. Not to mention the fact that when Aragorn enters the Houses of Healing, she is supplanted in the exactly the same way as Denethor.