[Oddwen]

Well, here I am again...posting, posting, posting...

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Scene: The Three Hunters, the White Wizard, the Host of Rohan, and two not-orcs approach Isengard.


Treebeard: Hoommmmmmmmmmmmooooooohhhhhooooooooommmmooohhhhooo om, Young Master Gandalf. I'm...glad, yes, glad you've come. Hotels and restaurants, stock and portfolios I can master, but there is a wizard to manage here. We think. There's this huge crater where Isengard used to be. No trace of the tower or wizard.

Gandy: Oh. Um. Script?

PJ: *whisperwhisperwhisper*

Howard Shore: Aright, time for some brooding theme music!

Gandy: *whispermutter, what the Angband am I supposed to...* Oh, ahem! But you said "used", and "no trace" of Saruman. What about "is?" Is he dead?

TB: We...don't know.

Gandy: Well, did you go into Isengard?

TB: *stare* You're kidding, right? I just explained...it...

Gandy: Well, the snake still had one tooth left, I think, for he has obviously poisoned your mind. But I shall speak to him.

TB: Is he kidding?

Aragorn: Probably not.

Gandy: Saruman, Saruman! Come down Saruman!

TB: Well anyway, this mess is slowly washing away. Soon the Isen will run clean again, and Drunkbeard and Dogbark can fix the dam. *glare*

Gandy: Saruman, Saruman. Saruman, you missed your path in life.

Aragorn: I think he has delusions of grandeur.

*Pippin, through a drunken haze, sees a glowing glow in the waters. After staring cross-eyed at it for a while, he fell off the horse*

Pip: Ahhhh*splash!*

*He appears back on the horse with a confused look on his face. He then climbs down very carefully down*

Gandy: Come back, Saruman!

Pip: *blubber*

TB: And trees, young trees who HAVEN'T flunked AA will come to summer vacation here, and the land will spring up green, and the little plants will shoot up towards the sky, and the sun will nourish the tender shoots sending their little roots deep into the rich earth...

Gandy: I did not give you leave to go...

Pip: Hey, cool, a glowing bowling ball! Anyone up for some ninepins?

Gandy: I am not Gandalf the Grey whom you betrayed...

Merry: Shure, can we find some sticks we can use for pins?

Gandy: I am Gandalf the White, returned from death!

Gimli: Ooh! Ooh! I want Legolas for my team!

Legs: Shut up, shorty.

Gandy: You have no colour now, and I cast you from the order and from the Council.

A: Hey, Pippin, that isn't a bowling ball!

Gandy: Saruman, your staff is broken! Pow, kapow, ziingie!

All: What?

Gandy: No, that was not thrown by Saruman; nor even at his bidding, I think. It came from a window far above. A parting shot from Master Wormtongue, I fancy, but ill aimed.

Éomer: Is it just me, or does he keep talking, like we're listening or something?

Gandy: Pippin, here, I did not ask you to handle that! Give it here!

Pip: Noo!

*After a few minutes of wrestling, Gandy managed to wrest the ball from Pippin's tight grasp. Barely*

Pip: Wahh! He BIT me!

Leggy: Ha, you owe me twenty dollars! Pay up!

Gimli: *grump*

Merry: Hey, now we can't play ninepins!

The Host: Aww, man! Stupid Gandalf!

Gandy: It is the end. Let us go.

*Not without a mutter, not without a death threat or two, the host made their way back to Edoras*

Pip: I'm gonna get you, Gandalf, if it's the last thing I do. Hey, Aragorn, let me back up! Don't leave me behind! Waiiiit uuuup youuuu guyyyyys!

TB: Well, bless my furry little hobbit feet!

Ent: Wrong metaphor there, sir.

TB: Shut up, Dutchelm!

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Annnd the next scene is Hail the Fallen Dead/The Palantir scene. And unless someone gets crackin', it'll be time for the EE Drinking Contest Scene!