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I don't think you have to be so hard on yourself. I mean, of course we're not all as gifted as Tolkien was, but the good thing is we are always motivated to try our best to pay our humble tribute to him.
But I can imagine how you felt, because I had a similar situation happen to me, when I tried to write a fanfic story. I had the characters (original characters), I had what was relatively a good storyline, but I made a mess of it because it had none of the charm and the beauty of Tolkien's writing, so I felt, like you did, that I somehow 'insulted' it and spoilt it. So I just stopped writing anything related to Middle Earth, even though I sometimes yearn to do it - I know I'm not capable so I let the moment pass.
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And no one was ill, and everyone was pleased, except those who had to mow the grass.
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