Evenstar, I think its the second option you mention. It shows what you hope or fear. It makes unconcious things concious, & forces you to confront them. It means that you can no longer go on repressing things. They're there, right in front of you, & you're forced to make a decision. I suspect Sam had been fearing what he saw in the Mirror for a very long time, but refused to face it, repressed it & wished it would go away. Those fears would have built & built through the quest, & possibly made it impossible for him to go on, even, at some point have driven him to abandon it & go back. By being shown the absolute worst thing that could have happened back home he was forced to make a decision. Without looking into the Mirror I wonder whether he could have done his 'job' as he called it.
It was the same with Frodo, only more so.
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