Bilbo: Look at me! I'm Perky, the pipe weed pusher!
Gandalf: Hush now! We'll have no more of that until WWXII
or
Gandalf: Do you realize that your pipe is bigger than your stunt double?
or simply, Bilbo: 
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'But Melkor also was there, and he came to the house of Fëanor, and there he slew Finwë King of the Noldor before his doors, and spilled the first blood in the Blessed Realm; for Finwë alone had not fled from the horror of the Dark.'
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