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I wish Saruman had blue hair and was a hippy
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Your wish is granted. Saruman smokes too much pot. Gandalf sees that he's relaxed and not worried about Mordor and joins him. In staring at their fingers, they forget about Frodo, the Fellowship and the Ring. When Gandalf finally remembers, he jumps into his VW bus, which stalls, drives to them as fast as he can, then sees them and, still hallucinating, thinks they're orcs. He hits them with his bus and leaves the bodies there for the Nazgul to find.
I wish there were more Gollum/Smeagol conversations in the movies.