Interesting thread topic.
I'm going to disagree in regards to someone helping you complete (make whole) yourself. In my own experience, my wife helped me on that journey (don't think that it ever ends). Surely I was on the path of desiring 'wholeness' at the time - I'd sworn off superficial relationships - but it was she that made it all possible. And I know that others would not have done the same, and so maybe she and I have a holy relationship.
But enough about me.
Eowyn had lost her father. That's a big whole to fill. Theoden didn't help fill that void enough; he loved her, yet he began to fail as Wormtongue began to possess his ear. Eomer, another source of love, was cut off to her as he was out gaining glory - maybe this helped him with his issues. Wormtongue, definitely the suitor from Angband, made the whole in her heart larger, not smaller, as he hoped that eventually she would fall for even him.
By the time Aragorn came along, Eowyn was really hurting. Theodred was just lost (another friend/cousin), and so she may have been at the bottom. Aragorn, a real man and a really good choice for a mate, shows up at that time. Of course this drowning woman is going to grab for anything (with the exception of Grima) that'll keep her afloat. When Aragorn slips her grasp, she goes under for the third time, and so we get Dernhelm.
Facing death in the form of the Witch-King, Eowyn passes through. Maybe she realizes that, as you state, that it's
in her and that she's already whole, though she does have a few wounds that need to be dressed and healed. This epiphany allows her open up and let someone like Faramir in, who then helps her with her own healing (and maybe he gets the help that he too needs from her).
Anyway, just some thoughts, and here's hoping that you're not too sad.