I think most of the characters had to face terrors, whether psychological or physical - it is a book about "the inevitability of death". Just one of the worst dilemmas/upsets faced was that faced by Elrond, Arwen and Aragorn. This is no simple love story, Tolkien shows just how difficult this was for all concerned. At the heart of the story of this trio of characters is the fact that if Arwen stays in Middle-earth she will become mortal, and that has greater consequences than the fact that she will one day die, it also means that this is a permanent sundering of her relationship with her father without any hope of being reunited after death.
Whichever decision Arwen makes, she is doomed to be permanently parted from either her father or her betrothed. Elrond knows that if his daughter marries Aragorn her happiness will only be bittersweet, and Aragorn knows that his love for Arwen is likely to take her away from her father and her family for good. I can imagine that Elrond more than kicked himself when his daughter met Aragorn! And the possibility of such situations is probably one of the many reasons why Elves do not mix with Men.
One interesting thing about the relationship is that Elrond does not want the pair to marry until Aragorn has regained his Kingship; for Elrond this would mean not only that the kingdom of Gondor be a safer place for his daughter to live, but the whole of Middle-earth would be safer too, as he must have known that with Sauron still in existence, it would have been nigh on impossible for Aragorn to reunify the kingdoms to any degree. Aragorn and Arwen seem to take Elrond's decision stoically. Arwen does not simply run off with Aragorn. This suggests that either she is trusting to 'fate' to make the decision to remain in Middle-earth or not, or that she has incredible faith and trust in Aragorn that he will achieve what has been set out for him. For Aragorn the impact this must have on him is to put tremendous pressure on him to succeed, yet he must have always borne in mind that if he did succeed, he would also bring great grief for Arwen.
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Gordon's alive!
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