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Master Kuru, apperantly you didn't see the entire episode! Dori won both competitions by default!
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Liar, Liar, corset on fire!! Somehow m'lady missed the fact that The Lord of Eagles and the Chief Warg both participated in this competition and gave Dori a good run for his money.
Unfortunately, the Eagle Lord, just as he was about to cross the finish line in first place he succumbed to temptation and ate the hobbit because he thought it was a rabbit.
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Dori tripped near the end and his hobbit dummy rolled across the finish line!
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Might I suggest m'lady acquire a pair of bifocals? It was the Chief Warg who tripped and whose hobbit rolled across the finish line. I can see how you would easily confuse the two. The Chief Warg was disqualified because both porter and portee had to cross at the same time. That allowed Dori, who was just behind the Warg, to win. His victory was a shining example to All-Under-Heaven of stick-to-itiveness and perseverance.
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As for up-down-up a tree, that's not alacrity that's stupidity!
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Not when it is the criteria of the competition it is not. Dori utterly routed his competition here. The Chief Warg couldn't figure out how to climb the tree, the Lord of Eagles couldn't figure out how to stop flying around, Smaug couldn't figure out how to show up, the Necromancer was already voted off, the hobbits curled up into pathetic balls and started whimpering, Roac merely offered platitudes, the elves actually managed to climb the trees but then started construction and couldn't be bothered to climb down again, the other dwarves found it much more fun to criticize the elves incompetent building, the goblins couldn't figure out how to not start a forest fire, and the trolls couldn't figure out how to not eat the trees. Dori, while the other dwarves obviously knew what the competition was about, was the only one who could overcome his desire to taunt the elves as their flets repeatedly fell down to the ground and fulfill the requirements of the competition. Truly a compassionate and goal-oriented individual who in no way deserves these calumnies that are being thrown his way.
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A grievous fallacy. Legolas is born already.
The sins of the sons, and film directors, should not be visited upon the fathers, especially if the fathers are fey, forest-dwelling epitomes of coolness.
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You can hardly punish somebody for a crime they haven't committed yet now can you? You have to punish them afterwards. His crime was having Legolas and being willfully and persistently an Elf!!
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Vote Balin today, Lady Spawnowen, and I'll happily vote Beorn tomorrow
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Don't pay any attention to him m'lady. Vote the Elvenking today and
I'll happily vote Beorn tomorrow. "Why in the world should I do that?" you ask. Because you can trust me to do as I say, unlike certain individuals of our mutual acquaintance. *cough*Anguirel*cough* In fact, I kept my word to him even though he betrayed me. How does he even have the gall to show his face here?!
