[Formendacil]

Your Honour,

I would like to assign Valentine's Day to Mordor, being fully aware that it is already serving an extended sentence there. I should however, like to prosecute it under new charges, and see it serve a sentence for them seperately.

I would like assign Valentine's Day to Mordor as one of the foulest examples of the perversion of an originally Christian holy day to a foul example of modern crass consumerism, rife with stench of physical gratuity, modern concepts of romance, and all sorts of ethical thoughts concerning the relationship of a man and a woman that run completely counter to the religion that the man for whom the holdiday is named believed in. If the proponents of modern lust gratification and the infatuation equals love movement wish to celebrate a day with a disgusting display of pink, red, and shapes roughly resembling a woman's bosom, I would ask them not to pick a day named for a Christian, indeed a Catholic, martyr.

The prosecution rests, Your Honour.