Tiring of those trick candles that reignite themselves Bilbo took desperate measures this year.
or
Bilbo was never good at telling a story
Little Hobbit Child: Ummm Mister Bilbo sir, I think your cake is catching the woods on fir...
Bilbo:....Hold on there little one, I haven't finished telling you my story about how I invented this red little device. I call it 'the red device'. You see it was on my birthday and I was floating into lake town, though at the time the fact that it was my birthday had slipped my mind. Now, I was riding a barrell not unlike this one on which I am standing, did I mention that I invented the red device which I hold...
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“I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo.
"So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”
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