After making sure Saruman was asleep, Grima snuck into the room where the Palantir was hidden. Things had been getting really boring lately, and Grima was also quite hungry.
"Hello?" he said as he looked into the mysterious object. "Denethor? Witch-King? If you know a good pizza place around here, could I get a large pizza with extra pepperoni? Thanks. Oh, and I've got something you might like here. Check it out."
Grima then proceeded to show embarrassing photos of Saruman from his Wizarding School days to everyone on the other end.