[mormegil]

Please read as this is the sum of my arguements with some additions as to why Merry is the best candidate for today's lynchings.

Originally Posted by Mormegil

We should thin out one of the groups who still have 5. That is minor works, LOTR, and The Hobbit. I suggest we keep Bullroarer as he is fairly interesting, for a hobbit. Merry on the other hand is rather obnoxious, he can't take orders and without Pippin he's kind of like David Spade without Chris Farley--Useless.

Originally Posted by mormegil

Well neither one is here now are they...so he is rather useless. He's neither a good serious nor a good funny. He tries to balance the two but fails horribly.

Originally Posted by mormegil

Let me add to my Merry argument. He essentially is neither here nor there. He's, as I said, moderately funny but not enough to keep neither is he serious enough to be kept for his depth. He's not exactly dumb, and we can find some charm in dumb or slow witted characters, but he's not really intelligent either. He's not a blundering nincompoop on the battle field, well at least by the end, but he's no master strategist either and do NOT tell me the Scouring of the Shire plan was a stroke of genius, he simply blew his horn and had the hobbits out number the ruffians. He's neither repugnant morally nor is he scrupulous.

The sum of it is: Merry is just plain and average and nothing he does can change that. There's really only a sense of mediocre blah when it comes to Merry and that my friends is a rating killer plain and simple.

Originally Posted by mormegil

No, my opinion isn't influenced by the movies so no need to worry, even if it were it's fairly irrelevant. However you admit that Merry is fairly bland and mediocre...this character type is horrible for ratings. Plus he's Pippin's friend and supporter and that alone is crime enough for a hanging.

Originally Posted by mormegil

Really to keep some balance we should be voting for the hobbit or LOTR characters as most will see the poor minor works folks won't make it very far because apparently some of you don't appreciate those works.

Look at Merry's name. Double r's are ambigious linguistically as they are pronounce very differently depending upon the language or dialect even. Take Portuguese for example, in Portugal you would make a near rolling R sound similar, yet different, to that of traditional Spanish. However, in Brazil it would make something closer to an H sound but even then the double R is messy and confusing in all languages and should go

Originally Posted by mormegil

My friends, it has become horribly obvious that there is some deft subterfuge at work here. This blatant attempt to get every minor work character evicted is nothing short of genocide. Mark my words today the excuse is "I like Merry so Alf needs to go" and tomorrow it will be a similar story but it will be another minor work character.

It is our moral obligation to stop this genocide and save those characters who, through no fault of their own, haven't received their due recognition. Alf is a wonderful character who has much more personality than Merry. He has a rags to riches story unlike Merry who was born in the hobbit aristocracy and never did anything to benefit anybody but himself.

SAVE THE MINOR WORK CHARACTERS AND VOTE MERRY.

Originally Posted by mormegil

Merry on the other hand was born into wealth by hobbit standards and a family of power and influence yet he did little with it.

Alf was humble about all his experiences and fortunes, Merry however flaunted his riches to his final days and tried to usurp that of others. He is a thief and that's a fact! He stole from Saruman and then flaunted Saruman's own pipe weed when he was a beggar. He taunted a poor old beggar man that had been cruelly defeated and stripped of any dignity by trees.

Originally Posted by mormegil

What did Merry do that made him a hero? He didn't kill the W-k we all know it was Eowyn and but for the charity of a lady he would be relegated to telling Hobbit stories to the Rohan women, it is my personal belief that Merry breathed a sigh of relief when King Theoden wouldn't let him come on the journey but to his utter dismay Eowyn roped him in and essentially had to tie him down so as to make him come. Of course since Merry had access to the history books he rewrote history to make himself look better.

Bullroarer, however, stopped and Orc invasion whereas didn't even kill a single orc in all of Pellenor fields let alone stop the entire invasion.

Plus, and most importantly, Merry is named after an emotion! What kind of man is named after and emotion? Seriously though!

Originally Posted by mormegil

What did Merry do in the Scouring of the Shire? He blew his horn and devised the master stratagem of surrounding his foes with superior numbers. Had his foes had any level of intelligence he wouldn't have done anything and would have been massacered. The Hobbits for crying out loud, guerilla tactics would be much more suited for them then open combat yet Merry was too dim witted to even see this.

He would never be my captain.

Originally Posted by mormegil

Kuru but the arguement inevitably be he was a master stratagist, and the simple fact is he is not! Like I said anybody could think of such a simple tactic, why even school yard bullies who generally have a rather low IQ (approaching that of primate levels) knows that basic concept.

Originally Posted by mormegil

No he wasn't and he didn't do anything, like I said he has rewritten the history books and this 'noble' poking in the knee of the W-k wasn't what it seemed either the sad truth is he was trying to escape and got confused when he tripped and poked the W-k in the knee.

As for leadership ability, Merry couldn't lead a pack of dung beatles to a pile of oliphant dung!

Originally Posted by mormegil

Lalaith,

I never said anything about Eowyn and her feats of bravery in that. I merely had to stop rival Kath. No the point being made is that Merry radically alters history to suit him.

I have adequately demonstared that Merry is uninteresting and a cheat. Would be woefully inadequate in a real battle. Without Pippin he becomes even a worse character and the poor fellow is depressed because at least with Pippin there was somebody less intelligent than he. He rewrote history, that is a crime and should be punished with death the least we could do is evict him.

Let me write a cute little poem

Mediocre
Expendable
Repugnant
Recreant
Yucky (okay this is sad but it's a difficult letter)

It's far too obvious that there is a strong movement to evict all minor work characters and that is just disgraceful. This Nordic voting block is becoming far too powerful and they need to be put in their place and quick otherwise they will begin to think they control this whole thing.

Merry is trite and boring. Do I need to dig in the archives and find more letter from the Professor?

In letter 679.

Merry is one of those characters that I just didn't know how to deal with. I began to write him in but then as his character developed, if you can call it that, I began to realize that he never should have been written in but I was so far into the story that I couldn't write him out so I left him despite my ethical objection to leaving such an awful character. By the end his only real purpose to serve as filler material and add more pages to the text. I ended up giving him some story plots so it wasn't obvious that I hated him, so I made some definate hints for the observant reader to detect that Merry had indeed changed history to suit himself. Thus, those who have the depth to see these hints really know that Merry was a sham character in an otherwise great tale.

++MERRY

I vow not to change my vote until Merry is gone and the arguements will continue too