http://www.forbes.com/forbeslife/hea...out604370.html
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Films that delivered the most "smoking impressions" included The Perfect Storm, Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring -- yes, the ritual smoking in the J.R.R. Tolkien movie counted -- Wild Wild West and Saving Private Ryan.
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Anti-tobacco activists want Hollywood to reduce smoking in movies and adjust the ratings system to give R-ratings to movies with smoking.
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However, there's always the option of starting with
'Bilbo Baggins was standing at his door after breakfast eating an enormous long stick of celery that reached nearly down to his woolly toes (neatly brushed)"
& ending
'Thank Goodness!' said Bilbo, laughing, & handed him the tofu.