That P and A made me laugh so much I'm crying, it's a good thing my tea wasn't done yet or else it would've gotten all over the computer...
Anyway...
Dear Mr Moreduck,
Why are we sending our complaints to you for the Phantom and Alien comic? You don't even work at The Downer! I'm suing you for your fraudulent newspaper and trying to take credit for things that you didn't do. I hope you're happy now!
Thank you for taking time to read my short letter, I expect to see you in court!
~A worried customer....