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			I wonder at the amount of hubris required to rewrite a world classic, not only for the necessities of time compression in a film environment, but to detrimentally alter the plot, radically change characters, and plop in superfluous storylines that bear absolutely no resemblance to the original author's intent.  
 
I wondered at this while Peter Jackson and Phillipa Boyens made a mockery of The Hobbit, stretching and warping a fairly linear and short novel into three torturous films, and I am even more flummoxed and bebothered at how Amazon could lay out $1 billion (or whatever the ridiculous amount was), and yet hire hapless hacks to scribble fatuous fan-fiction with characterizations and plotpoints that anyone who has read Tolkien would immediately recognize as nonsense, and open itself up to such scathing critical ridicule. 
 
We wonders, precious-s-s, we wonders.
		 
		
		
		
		
		
		
			
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				And your little sister's immaculate virginity wings away on the bony shoulders of a young horse named George who stole surreptitiously into her geography revision.
			 
		
		
		
		
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