Nice Saraphim. How about Sam as a professional chef! I can see it now
Quote:
Sam: And we lightly garnish the rabbit with a little bit of salt, stew it, and garnish some chips next to it!
Gollum: Keep your nasty chips!
Sam: After the commercial, 101 recipies for Lembas!
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And how about Sauron as a baby sitter 
Quote:
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Sauron: Where's the baby? I see you!
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Also, how about Ents as plumbers!
Quote:
Treebeard: Hello? Ents plumbing. How may I help you?
Saruman: I've got a dam that needs repairs! Can you help?
Treebeard: We'll be right over!
(Treebeard goes over and breaks the dam)
Saruman, oblivious the the river comming into the ring: How's it going back there?
Treebeard: How about you pay me in cash...now!
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What a world 
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'But Melkor also was there, and he came to the house of Fëanor, and there he slew Finwë King of the Noldor before his doors, and spilled the first blood in the Blessed Realm; for Finwë alone had not fled from the horror of the Dark.'
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