[Diamond18]

"Oh my ERU!"

Vogonwë leapt up, hitting his head on the roof of the transport. A hollow clang echoed throughout the cab.

“What is it?” Pimpi asked, surprised. Vogonwë sat back down, wincing and muttering a string of Simian under his breath. “Are you all right?”

“I hit my head,” he stated the obvious.

“Yes, but why did you scream and jump up?”

Vogonwë couldn’t remember for a moment or two, but then it came rushing back to him like a flash flood with a grudge against nature. “Harvey!” he cried, nearly jumping up again. Pimpi placed a hand on his arm to keep him down.

“Who?”


“Harvey! Gravlox’s rabbit! I’ve lost him!” Vogonwë cast an agitated gaze around the speeding bus. "I forgot all about him, and I can’t even remember the last time I saw him!”

“I haven’t seen him since Leninia’s dungeon,” Pimpi looked at the diminutive diva sharply.

“You didn’t eat him, did you?” Vogonwë worried. As the bruise near his ribs flowered, he said, “I’m sorry, that was a stupid question. Maybe he’s in one of our packs….”

“If he were, he’d probably have starved and/or suffocated to death,” Pimpi pointed out helpfully as Vogonwë began to rummage through the packs. A few minutes later, having come up empty, Vogonwë sank back into his seat with a groan.

“I’m sorry, Vogie. Perhaps we’ll find another bunny in the Mire,” suggested Pimpi.

“No!” Vogonwë responded, fiddling with a Game-Wizardling he’d found in the bottom of the Gateskeeper’s pack. He threw it over his shoulder in disgust. “Now what am I going to do when Gravlox shows up again, red-eyed, snorting smoke, and hot on revenge? I was going to hold Harvey up and squeal like a girl, ‘You wouldn’t hurt the Elf who saved your pet, would you?’ but now, now I have nothing!”

“Vogie!” Pimpi sought to sooth his gasping speech and frenzied hand motions. “What makes you think he’s going to show up again?” She lowered her voice so that Merisu wouldn’t hear: “When They got back There, They probably killed Him.”

“But I killed him, and he came back! Who’s to say the third time won’t be the charm?” Vogonwë whispered back.

“Well, I don’t know about that… but, sweetie, if you killed him he can’t be that scary, after all,” Pimpi patted his arm.

“I beat him with Aim-well Spells and arrows,” Vogie hissed, beads of sweat popping out on his forehead. “He won’t give me the chance of a duel next time. And sure, I know some fancy schmancy martial arts moves, but it’ll be daggers and claws and fangs.”

“But you don’t have claws or fangs.”

“Precisely.”

Pimpi looked worried for the first time. “Well,” she said, “maybe he’ll forgive you even though you killed him and then lost his rabbit.”

They both fell silent, contemplating this possibility, then shook their heads in unison.

“Hmmm. I know!” Vogonwë’s face lit up after a moment. “I could write a eulogy for Harvey, and present it to Gravlox. That way, he would be so touched by my beautiful words of heartfelt lament that he’ll forget I lost his pet in the first place.”

Pimpi was silent for a moment, then she folded her hands in her lap and studied them a moment. “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” she said finally.

But Vogonwë had already whipped out pen and paper and was busily composing his masterwork. She sighed, and glanced around the bus, noting that Soregum was puffing on his pipe while watching her. She stiffened, but tried to pretend that she didn’t notice the old, short, fat, darkly clad hobbit’s constant and unsettling gaze, by turning away slightly and looking out the window. Little did she realize that by doing so she put her lovely young, tall, lithe, colorfully clad profile at its best advantage, with the sun from the window shining down around her.

Soregum, meanwhile, was contemplating (among other things) the odd conversation between the half-halfing and her nitwit of a boyfriend. Who was this Gravlox? With a name like that, surely not an Elf or any creature these folks were likely to be consorting with. And yet they seemed concerned about gaining his forgiveness for having dispatched with him. Whatever he was, if he harbored a violent grudge against Vogonwë, he might make a valuable acquaintance….