Thread: The Desolation
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Old 12-13-2013, 03:06 PM   #29
Lalwendė
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Lalwendė is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendė is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
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Iconoclastic. That's how it's best described in one word. Jackson has taken Tolkien's text and thrown it into the Cracks of Doom and used what was spat back out. This is the one film of all Jackson's adapts that you will love or hate. It has new characters and a new storyline and is thoroughly rip-roaring and grown up; it's everything I should despise but it was the best one since Fellowship.

I went to Sheffield IMAX early to bag my favourite seats in front of Europe's biggest screen (allegedly). Some had got there even earlier. It was full of geeks, and it got rammed full of even more geeks. The rest of the screenings were sold out and there was a queue outside camping (not in the Vicious way) in the corridors. I spent the first 5-10 minutes feeling a sense of outrage that this was not The Hobbit. And then had a word with myself that maybe I ought to forget I'd ever read the book and suspend reality as t'were. That was the right thing to do. If you make a habit of watching comic book films you will know that you need to do this quite often - remember the rewrite of Superman just this summer? Forget that Superman just doesn't act like this and enjoy the ride.

So, I just watched as though this was virgin territory. It's not at all a good film of Tolkien's text. However, it is a very good film. 8/10. It is mostly coherent, though parts get a bit baggy and overlong. It has outstanding performances - all of them. The characterisation is perfect The 'look' is beautiful. It has interesting detail thrown in. And because Jackson ripped up his copy of The Hobbit, it is full of surprises and you will get spoilers if you read about it. They aren't just spoilers in the sense of 'what have they done with x', but real spoilers.

I got the strong impression that with this film, Jackson simply decided he was never going to make us hardcore fans happy, no matter how faithful he tried to be, so he was just going to do his own thing in the quest for internal coherence. I kind of hope that Steven Moffat never, ever realises this and does the same thing to Doctor Who. Though what Jackson has done to The Hobbit is much the same as what would happen if Moffat suddenly cast a woman as the Doctor. He has quite simply turned the whole thing upside down. you will love it or hate it. It's revisionist. It's not The Hobbit. But it is a good film.

Now to get granular...the single most outstanding feature was Smaug. I was not overly keen on Cumberbaps voice interpretation though it wasn't terrible. But the CGI was awesome. That WAS Smaug. He looked perfect. There's something that happens at the end to him before he breaks free and it is simply beautiful cinema. The created storyline of the caper under the Mountain is a bit hokey and too long, but I didn't mind it because it meant More Smaug. And sorry to be spoilery, but we will have him in the final film, which I rather like because for the past 31 years I have always felt the Hobbit went downhill rapidly once Smaug was despatched. The Battle of Five Armies was always something I found a little tedious.

There were good set piece scenes such as the spiders in Mirkwood which was unpleasant. I also commend the Mirkwood scenes in general as wonderfully trippy. They must have used some Alan Lee designs for this part, too. It wasn't my internal Mirkwood, and it was the wrong story, but it was a bonkers one I really enjoyed. The Beorn scenes were simply not long enough, though what we saw was good, including some large bees I liked. And the barrel escape was enjoyable.

About Tauriel - I was dreading this, really not looking forward to it at all in an almost melodramatic fashion. Now I eat my words. Taken in the context of the new story Jackson created, she worked and was not a Mary Sue. I failed to see a 'love triangle' going on, rather that it was an echo of what Gimli loved about Galadriel. There was a puzzling use of walnuts as a pillow though. Was this some kind of smutty in joke? And where a red haired Silvan Elf came from...what exactly had Maedhros been up to?

Moving on from Tauriel of course brings me to Thranduil, who was superbly interpreted. Creepy, imperious, a bit horrible. Lee Pace ate up the celluloid every time he appeared. I detected a little bit of Hiddleston's Loki about his part, a little bit of Lucius Malfoy, and he beat Hugo Weaving's Elrond into a cocked hat (or tiara...). Stephen Fry was alright too; not his biggest fan as he's so ubiquitous and I'm tired of him, but he was good. I liked the choice of name for his greasy Grima-like assistant and that namecheck will please a small boy I know who has talked about little else than The Hobbit for days (but who had to go to school today, muahaha). Some more acting nods - Luke Evans and Bard's little family (great acting from the girls); Martin Freeman pulling an even better Bilbo this time around; and Orlando Bloom much more mature and experienced as an actor. The Lake Town populace are great, too.

I also need to work out from the conversation in Bree how much, exactly, was lifted from Unfinished Tales. I bet the Estate have been pulling their hair out. I quite liked this because it was bordering on naughty creative thievery.

Aside from this film not really being The Hobbit, there were other errors, though this time ones which could not be overlooked by suspending my expectations and prior knowledge. There is not enough of that trippy Mirkwood and no Bombur falling in the stream. There is a Gandalf side story which just did not work for me and I think was there purely to have more Gandy screen time. With repeat viewings I suspect I will get more narked at this as it was close to a bit of a hot mess. The only good bit of that was Gandy's meeting with Rrrrradagast.

And there are far too many Orcs again. We didn't need them, the Dragon to end all Dragons is more than enough Big Bad for one film!

Wasn't so struck on the end titles song, though whether that was more to do with my dislike of Ed Sheeran or my sore, stiff bum, I don't know.

Let's be frank, Tolkien will be rolling in his grave tonight. And if that thought disturbs you, then don't go and watch it. However, while Tolkien's story may have been stripped out, Tolkien's characters are there, very much big and bold and perfectly done. If you want to see them all in a story that's different, then fill yer boots.
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